Writing on the Wall

Staying True to Your Characters

2012-01-11T08:30:00.003-07:00

by Annette Lyon

I love reading a book where the characters are so well-drawn that they feel real. Where I read a description or action and know exactly why this character said, acted, or described something a specific way.

Writing characters that are round instead of flat, who seem to breathe off the page instead of walk around like paper dolls, is hard.

Some time ago I posted about character lenses. That concept is one of my favorite tools for characterization, ever. If you haven't read that post, go read it now to brush up on what I mean by "lenses."

Short version: It's the unique way each character views the world. (But the post explains it in greater detail.)

The crucial part:

Creating a lens does you no good unless that lens colors every page that the character shows up on. If we see it for the first time on page 287, it's useless.

Here are some ways to give your character a lens:

A Defining Characteristic

I've visited the house of Finnish composer Jean Sibelius twice in my lifetime. Both times, a trait of his stood out to me: he was a synesthete, meaning he had what's known as synesthesia.

Synethesia is when two senses that wouldn't normally cross, do. One synesthete may see colors with letters. Another may associate a personality with numbers, and so on.

For Sibelius, sound had color. He had a painting hanging in his house with a lot of a specific shade of yellow that, to him, was D Major. A bright green fireplace was the exact shade of F major. (Apparently he "saw" only major keys, not minor.)

Give your character something that distinguishes them, like synesthesia . . . or something less dramatic.

Does your synesthete hear a shrill minor key when walking in city traffic? Does a lullaby evoke a peaceful light blue? If we learn how your character interacts with their world through their individual attributes, everything will be more alive, even if that attribute isn't nearly as "out there" as synesthesia.

Passions

What really gets your character excited?

If it's food, then a totally awesome event should be described in terms of European chocolate or a favorite restaurant's cuisine.

If your character loves to knit, use terms about yarn, stitches, gauges, needles, and the frustration of frogging.

If it's motorcycles, use terms that evoke the passion, whether it's rev and gear, or other things, like the challenge of fixing the engine yourself, running out of gas, a flat tire, or the thrill of wind in your hair.

If your character is a football star and experiences something totally exciting, don't describe it as heavenly; describe it as feeling like he won the Super Bowl.

Career/Talents

Whatever your character is good at is likely something that will color their lens.

For some old friends of mine, that would be theater. I could write about an actor and use theater terms to color experiences in the story, events in the story that of themselves have nothing to do with theater. Think green room, opening night jitters, break a leg, flop, standing ovation, etc.

Brandon Sanderson does this well in his Way of Kings. A main character is a soldier, but he's no ordinary soldier; as a boy, he was trained to be a surgeon. He views life (and the battlefield) in terms of a surgeon. He doesn't just see blood; he knows exactly where the man was pierced with a sword and how it must have missed an artery, because of the way the blood flows.

Background

Dad grew up as a farm boy. Mom grew up in a metropolitan European city. People used to joke that they were the embodiment of the Green Acres TV show, and the idea wasn't that far off.

When Dad saw my sister watching Charlotte's Web and crying, he shook his head and said, "Pigs are dirty. And they're food." By this point, he was a professor, but it was the farm boy speaking.

Mom, on the other hand, to this day, finds her eye drawn every time she passes a Jaguar on the road. The metropolitan girl is still there.

A different way of looking at it: A few years ago, PEG's own Heather Moore and I co-chaired a writing conference, and as part of our duties, we picked up a literary agent from the airport. On the way to dinner, she commented about how gorgeous the mountains were.

This was mid-March. As northern Utahns know, that's probably the ugliest time of year for our dear mountains. But for someone who'd never seen mountains like this, close up, they were beautiful.

In a story, a Utahn might not notice the mountains unless the seasons were changing, especially in the fall. But a transplant would.

Along the same vein, a tourist might walk the streets of Manhattan, head back to see the tops of the skyscrapers, and a local would know right away that the other person is a tourist. Locals don't gaze upward at the skyscrapers.

In every scene, get into your point-of-view character's head and mindset. That could mean more than one of these elements. Perrin in Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time series uses both black smith imagery and wolf imagery as his lens, and both totally work.

As you think about your characters, you'll not so much create a lens for them as much as discover what's already there.

Upcoming Live Critiquing Workshop: March 3, 2012

2011-12-29T16:18:00.002-07:00

Back by popular demand . . .

Our next LIVE CRITIQUING WORKSHOP:

March 3, 2012
American Fork Library
64 South 100 East, American Fork, UT
Doors open: 10:00 a.m.
Workshop: 10:30 a.m. -- 3:30 p.m.

Includes one hour lunch break, lunch on your own

Registration deadline: Feb 25, 2012

**Limited Space**

Payments to: www.paypal.com
Pay $35.00 to PayPal account: editor@precisioneditinggroup.com
**include "PEG Workshop" in the notes
**include your email address in the notes if different from your paypal address
(you don't need a PayPal account to do this)

Instructors include our very own editors:
Annette Lyon (Best of State winner, Whitney Award winner, author of historical fiction, women's fiction, romance, middle grade fantasy, non-fiction, including a cookbook)

Josi S. Kilpack (Whitney Award winner, author of women's fiction, romance, suspense, and culinary mysteries)

Lu Ann Staheli (Best of State winner in non-fiction, Best of State educator, author of celebrity memoirs, and columnist)

Heather B. Moore (Best of State winner, Whitney Award winner, author of historical fiction, women's fiction, and non-fiction)

Julie Wright (Whitney Award winner, author of middle grade science fiction, time-travel, contemporary young adult, women's fiction, and romance)

Bring:
15 pages of your manuscript, double-spaced, 12 point type
**Make 6 copies for your critique table

(We may not get through all 15 pages, but we should get through at least 10)

Questions? Email us: editor@precisioneditinggroup.com

Official PEG Workshops Blog Here

In Writing, Nothing Is Black and White

2011-12-14T07:17:00.000-07:00

by Annette Lyon

Recently at a meeting with my critique group, we got to talking about giving advice to other writers. All of the members of my group have spoken at writing conferences, at workshops, in classrooms. And we've all had aspiring writers come to us with specific questions.

We all try to help as best we can. But there's a little secret behind all our advice:

In writing, there are no black and white answers.

The craft and industry has some general rules, yes. But you can find exceptions to just about every rule.
You can find plenty of successful writers who violate rules all over the place.
What works for me may not work for you.
And while it pains me to say this: this includes grammar and punctuation, to a point.

Whether it's outlining, point of view, character development, world building, finding time to write, getting over writer's block, or a hundred other things, no one has the ultimate answer.

Really.

That said, figuring out what works most of the time and for most people is useful.

Learning the acceptable rules of grammar and punctuation will be in your favor . . . so that when you need to violate them, you can do so effectively and purposefully.

Following industry expectations usually plays in your favor when seeking publication, so you can come across as a professional.

You may be the exception. Or not.

So . . . How do you know if you are?

Um, yeah. Another tricky question. You can't really know, at least, at first. Figuring it out takes time and practice. And a lot of both.

My advice: learn the rules. Learn to use them well. Figure out why they're rules in the first place. That could mean years of practice.

You can't know what works for you until you do. So try outlining. If that just isn't you, try pantsing it. Chances are you're somewhere between the two extremes. Play around until you find the place on the continuum that fits you best.

You'll have far more success finding your own way than trying to duplicate someone else's journey to publication.

No writer follows the same path as any other. You'll find obstacles unique to you, things you need to figure out on your own. Things that, frustrating as that is, may not have a clear black and white answer.

None of this is to say to ignore the instruction of writing teachers, to stop going to conferences, to stop reading blogs like this one, or to abandon writing books, podcasts, and the rest.

Rather, it means to expose yourself to as many different ways of viewing the writing process and the rules behind it so that you can find your personal niche.

If something a writing teacher passes along doesn't resonate with you, that's okay. Maybe another writer's way of viewing the same issue will work better for you.

Along the way, you'll stumble upon situations where you'll want to do something out of the lines. If you've put in the work, you'll know if you can do that. You'll be able to do it better than if you tried going into it blind. And coming out the other end, you'll know why it worked.

So: Learn as much as you can. Read lots. Practice writing even more than that. Figure out which rules work best for you.

You'll eventually discover what is your black, your white

Poisoned Apples

2011-12-13T16:17:00.001-07:00

By Julie Wright

I've recently discovered the TV series Once Upon a Time. For someone like me, who is an avid junkie of all things fairytale, this is a delightful series. I only wish I'd discovered it when it had moved into its second or third season so I could buy the DVDs and watch at my own leisure.

While I was at ABC's website streaming the first few episodes (available for a short time only), I found the comments list. It was during the second episode. I was waiting for the show to buffer so scrolled down to see what else there was to do, because I am a chronic multi-tasker and really hate even a few seconds of idle time. One of the comments was,

"Inconsistency with the apples...she says honeycrisp tree then hands Emma a red delicious. I know, I know, it's small, but details like that are important to me."

There were several comments about the honeycrisp. Apparently a lot of people know their apples. I didn't actually catch the error, because I don't know apples, but I found the comments interesting--comments like, "I know it's small, but details like that are important to me."

There is power in getting the details right.

Don't get me wrong. I totally understand the frustration that research brings. I know what it's like to get to a place where I simply don't know how it really works. That's one of the reasons I set aside a book I'd felt very strongly about. I was lost in the research and realized that until I could commit to the research, I had no business writing the book. It's easy to let little details go while thinking, "How many people really know what a honeycrisp apple looks like anyway?"

The answer is: A lot of people.

And them knowing the right answer when the writer got it wrong yanks them out of the story. Some readers will roll their eyes and dive back into the story. Others will roll their eyes and TRY to dive back in, but they'll keep surfacing so they can do another eye roll, and the book loses some of its original excitement. And others will roll their eyes and walk away because they can't get past the fact that the writer got it wrong.

For them, a wrong apple turned into something toxic--poisonous to their ability to suspend disbelief.

It takes time to get the details right, but it takes even more time to try to win back readers who feel like you've failed them. Don't set a volcano in Sweden if you aren't sure about whether or not such a thing could exist. Don't trust to just Google or Wiki for your sources (though they are great resources). Take a moment and call the hospital to talk to their night shift nurse to find out a detail about how his/her shift works or what protocol is for seeing a patient. Call the post office to find out how much it would cost to mail a pot of gold back to Ireland. Call an STD hotline to find out actual statistics (though they might ask you what your symptoms are and think the "writing a book" is just a cover story). Go ride a horse, go rockclimbing, go . . . DO whatever it is you have your character doing (within reason--if your character is jumping off the Empire State Building, you definitely should not do that).

I had a teenager who wanted to be a writer ask me for the most important bit of advice I felt I could give. I told him to: Go. Live. Life.

See, taste, smell, hear, touch life. Your own experiences are your best research.

Bite into a honeycrisp.
But make sure not to pick one from the tree where the queen used to live. Better to not take chances.

Help Me Focus!

2011-11-30T13:28:00.005-07:00

by Annette Lyon

First off: To all you NaNo-ers out there, keep pushing on this last day! Congratulations to all the winners out there; celebrate your accomplishment!

I have had a hard time focusing lately. That includes work on my writing, my editing, and even attention to housework and (worse!) to my family.

Many things can be blamed for it, among them the legitimate issues of ADD and chronic pain.

But life must go on. I need to write and edit. More, I need to make sure my family actually eats and has clean underwear.

I've found a some things to help, some of which don't make much sense at first glance. In hopes that some of them may help you, here's a list:

White Noise

Yes, Virginia, it really does help you focus. At least, it does for someone with ADD. My son (who inherited it from Mom, alas) discovered Simply Noise, which has several free options. The basic choices are all essentially what's known as "white noise" but which all sound slightly different. The variations are called white, pink, and brown noise.

Brown noise is my favorite (and my son's, too). I find myself able to focus on a project and get a lot more done in less time while listening to it.

The site also has other sounds, downloadable for a small fee, like ocean waves and a thunderstorm.

A To-do List

People who follow me on Facebook are aware of this one: I have a list of things I want to accomplish in a month. Yes, a month. Big-picture, yet concrete, goals are easier for me to handle than specific ones I have to get done today. With monthly goals, I can look at the list and decide what I can do now.

It's a hard-copy list in a notebook, so I have the bonus of using a bright orange Sharpie to cross out items as I do them.

Major sense of accomplishment!

Accountability

I have a writer friend who has also become my accountability buddy. At the beginning of each month, we email one another our progress on last month's goals and our goals for the upcoming month.

This provides an outside source of accomplishment (getting ego strokes from someone outside my brain helps a ton), and it's also an extra motivation to reach the goals I sent her before. Saying, "Yeah, well, I totally dropped the ball on all my goals" isn't going to cut it.

Meeting with my critique group helps here too. I need to have pages to read when I show up, so I'd better write some.

Minimizing Distractions

For me, that means the Internet. I can sit at my computer with great intentions to do X, Y, and even Z on my to-do list. Then I check email, Twitter, Facebook, and news links, and next thing I know, I've blown two hours.

There's a reason a product exists where you pay for it to disable your Internet connection for determined periods so you can focus on your work.

At one point I wondered if a smart phone would help. (For years, I have a simple candy-bar style phone that did nothing fancier than text.) I figured that if I got online updates while away from my computer, I wouldn't feel as tied to it. Then, when I did sit down at my desk, maybe I'd get more work done.

It was just a theory. Until now. Due to a set of unforeseen circumstances, I got to open my Christmas present early: a shiny new iPhone.

It's done exactly what I predicted: I don't feel the same urge to sit at my desk just to make sure I don't miss something. My kitchen is cleaner than it has been in a while. I got more reading in today. And more writing in. And research. Oh, and I wrote this blog post.

I think this is the most I've accomplished in one day in, well, a really long time.

A Timer

One element I didn't expect to help me on my iPhone, but which has: setting alarms. I'll set it 30 minutes out, and suddenly I can stay on task. When the phone rings, I get to do something else, if whatever I'm doing feels hard. Or, on the flip side, if I have only X amount of minutes to accomplish such-and-such, I'll buckle down and work hard. Great tool, and one I'm sure I'll be using more.

What helps you focus?

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-11-28T15:08:00.001-07:00

One of our readers has submitted a query letter for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #51

Dear [Agent],

300 years ago Ciara Lovel refused to marry Giovanni Berlusconi to be with another man.

Giovanni, now known as Charley Bersley, wants her all the same after three long centuries. Relentlessly he seeks to get back at Ciara for not wanting him the same way he lusts after her.

Ciara is a talented violinist in this life. She desperately tries to find work after she took a break from playing professionally seven years ago. Though, performing is her calling. But after she witnessed the death of her father and her ex-agent Charley Bersley sexually abused her, an involuntary break was necessary.

Finally offered an arrangement in her birth city Vienna, Ciara flies to Austria and almost immediately after her arrival is sucked into a web of lies and mysterious incidences.

Someone breaks into her hotel room, sabotages her newfound career as a professional violinist, and attempts to drive her off the road. Ciara cannot get rid of the feeling that someone has deliberately been trying to lure her to Vienna and that she was now exactly where they wanted her to be.

To complicate matters, she is unwillingly attracted to the producer of the arrangement. A gorgeous subject of the male species, named Raphael O’Malley. She feels as if she knows him intimately, but laughs at her feelings because she doesn’t believe in stupid things like karma, fate and that kind of stuff.

Ciara’s own past is going to prove her wrong as she faces the product of the man that has been unknowingly stalking her for the past 300 years. She must protect her family from harm and this time around, keep the one man she has ever loved alive.

I read in Writer’s Digest that you’re interested in paranormal romance. BUTTERFLY is my 100,000 word debut novel and I think that it might interest you.

I’m a violinist and was born in Vienna, Austria. Currently, I’m living in Salt Lake City and working on my next novel.

I’d be glad to send you my complete manuscript for your review. Thank you for your time and consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Sincerely,
[Author]

Making It to "The End"

2011-11-23T15:12:00.008-07:00

by Annette Lyon

Earlier this week, I had the chance to speak to a high school creative writing class. One question I got:

What to do when you have several partial books, but keep running into road blocks, so you abandon the story and start another one?

This young woman had several partial books, but not one finished one. What to do?

Here's the advice I gave, plus a bit more (since I have more time here):

Two pieces of advice:

1) Read up on plot structure.

Chances are, the plot ran into a ditch because you don't know where it was supposed to go or how to steer it. That doesn't mean you have to outline everything, but it does mean understanding how plots work: their structure.

Some writing books I recommend:

Scene and Structure, by Jack Bickham

This book pretty much blew my mind back when I first read it in about 2004. It's a great resource for teaching structure on a scene/sequel level. (If you don't know what a sequel is, you need this book.) It goes into scene questions and the possible answers, how to fix wrong turns, and how to find the crux of the story. Fantastic.

The Writer's Journey, by Christopher Vogler

Another book that had my head spinning. But when I finally got my bearings, it proved immensely useful. It's actually a screenwriting book that uses the classic Hero's Journey as a model. Many people think the archetypal Hero's Journey belongs solidly in fantasy and science fiction, but not so.

The first book I drafted after reading this book (a historical romance) was the easiest book I've ever drafted. I often looked at the plot and pondered what was missing or how I could improve this or that based on archetypal characters and Hero's Journey elements. And I always found a solution.

Story, by Robert McKee

A couple of years ago at a writing conference I attended, I heard this book referred to over and over again, so I finally jotted down the title and author and ordered it.

Story Engineering, by Larry Brooks

I've heard mixed reviews here, some people saying it's their new writing bible, while others say it's stuff they've already heard (the latter is generally from writer veterans).

Save the Cat, by Blake Snyder

Yet another screenwriting book. I've found that learning about story structure through film is easier to grasp than on a book level: you can watch a movie in a couple of hours and watch the elements unfold. It's also easier for writers to refer to movies and have a good chance that the readers have seen many of them and therefore understand the concepts. Another writing bible here.

Read Industry Blogs

When I first started writing in 1994, most people didn't have e-mail addresses, let alone access to the massive amounts of information available on the Internet today. Now, you can consult Dr. Google to learn just about anything.

Need to know how to craft a query letter? How advances and royalties work? The difference between genres and markets? The answers are a search away.

A few great blogs to get you started (be sure to check the archives for questions that may have already been answered):

Janet Reid
Query Shark (A query critique blog run by Janet Reid)
Rachelle Gardner
BookEnds
Nathan Bransford
Steven Pressfield

Podcasts

Sometimes hearing it from the horse's mouth (from people already successful in the field) is more helpful than anything. Podcasts are typically short (15 to 30 minutes). I'll download several episodes to my iPod and listen as I clean house or drive.

Some particularly useful podcasts:

The Appendix (About to take a hiatus, but it's got a great archive. Also: I've been a guest a few times!)
Writing Excuses (With big-time writers like Brandon Sanderson, Dan Wells, Howard Taylor, and Mary Robinette Kowal)
Word Play (Especially for MG and YA writers, with Nathan Bransford, James Dashner, and J. Scott Savage)

2) My other piece of advice is to plant your behind in the chair and write.

There's nothing like actually finishing a manuscript, even if it's not the best. Coming to the end of a story is an accomplishment unlike any other, and it gives you the vision that yes, you can succeed. And do it again.

If you need a kick in the pants to keep yourself writing, order, read, highlight, and keep at your fingertips for further reading Steven Pressfield's The War of Art.

You'll thank me on that one.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-11-21T13:51:00.000-07:00

One of our readers has submitted a query letter for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #50

Dear [Agent],

Seventeen-year-old Julienne White arrives in the town of Luray on a stretcher. At the hospital, she discovers the bone-deep gash in her leg is gone. Dresden, the boy who saved her from the horrific car accident, claims she was never hurt. She can’t decide if she’s crazy or he’s hiding something.

Julienne is afraid to fall in love and struggles with her increasing feelings for Dresden. When Dresden keeps materializing out of nowhere to save Julienne’s life, she discovers that he has unique powers. She has no idea that Dresden is part of The Trinity, a trio that is destined to guard her from Zamir.

Zamir is stealing powers from people like Dresden and turning everyone into his slaves by giving them magical necklaces that promise the power they’ve always wanted, but their powers come at a price, instead, they become his slaves.

A world unknown is opened up to Julienne when she finds that she’s the only one who can yield the Silvian necklace, a necklace that can countermand the spell that keeps Zamir from dying. Everything rests on her shoulders.

TRINITY is the first of a YA Fantasy Romance trilogy. The first completed novel of 82,000 words is available for your review.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-11-14T07:03:00.000-07:00

One of our readers has submitted a query letter for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #49

Dear [AGENT]:

She loves him, but he is in love with a ghost.

In Shadows, a young adult paranormal romance, high school senior Samantha Bell is falling hard for her best friend, Mark Baxter, but complications from his past begin to haunt them as Mark’s former girlfriend, Kate Duncan, appears. Oh, and Kate is dead.

Sam (Samantha) soon experiences the frustration in dealing with a spurned ghost who can appear at any time and interrupt any moment, but then the real dilemma unfolds.

Sam learns that Kate, who died in the mid-eighteen hundreds, was cursed by someone she once trusted. Kate is stuck in the mortal realm, never to cross over and be at rest, but she was promised that her true love will die and join her before he turns nineteen. Kate thought this could never happen since the living can’t even see her, let alone love her—until she met Mark who can do both. Mark will turn nineteen next year.

Now Sam, jealous of a freaking ghost, is forced to endure the heartbreak of doomed love but keep Mark in the dark about his impending demise. She must do this as she juggles school, friends and family who can’t see the irritating Kate, and figure out why an attractive guy named Peter is stalking her.

When Sam learns Peter is also a ghost and is trying to protect her, Sam’s world shifts even more as the isolated situation with Kate opens up into something Sam isn’t sure she wants to be a part of; a world where ghosts aren’t just harmless specters who slam doors and throw dishes.

I believe Shadows, completed at 78,000 words, would be a good fit for you and I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you for your time and consideration.

[AUTHOR]

Writing Retreats

2011-11-09T16:17:00.006-07:00

by Annette Lyon

Last week, from Thursday afternoon through Sunday morning, I attended a writing retreat.

The group consisted of twenty writers. Under the direction and coordination of Danyelle Ferguson, we rented out a cabin in the mountains and wrote out hearts out. Imagine: a three-floor cabin virtually silent, save for the tapping of keyboards. We took breaks for meals. We had several competitions where we did 20-minute writing sprints, cranking out as many words as we could. There were door prizes, laughter, great talk, and lots and lots of words.

If memory serves, we wrote more than a combined 266,000 words. That's more than 5 NaNoWriMo books. The retreat overlapped with Precision Editing's own write-a-thon, so several attendees hunkered down to write even harder during that period.

Part of my personal success on the retreat (I ended up just shy of 26,000 words) was thanks to advance preparation.

A few things that helped:

A list of upcoming scenes with brief descriptions. And by "brief," I mean less than a sentence. I had 10 or so scenes planned out. That way, I could hop around and write whatever section hit my fancy (and jump to a brand new one when we started a sprint).
A novel in progress. I think that starting a manuscript from scratch at a retreat might be challenging. But by showing up with nearly half the book already written, I didn't have to flounder around, trying to find my characters' voices or what the major conflicts were. Instead, I hit the ground running.
Scrivener. This is my first attempt at writing with the software (which is now available for Windows, booyah). The program made the retreat really easy, because I could swap from one scene to the next with (literally) a click or two of the mouse. I stamped my scene cards on the program's cork board with labels like "To Do," "Partial Draft," "First Draft," "Revised Draft," and "Done."
Find your way to focus. Whether that's silence, music, or something else (chocolate?), use it.
Breaks. You can't write for twelve hours straight, several days in a row. Your (or, at least, my) brain can't handle it. Some attendees set timers for regular breaks. You'll be more productive with a few well-timed breaks than trying to plow through more words when your brain has turned to mush.

Every retreat is a bit different. Some may require attendees to take turns cooking. Others may include speakers (we had a set of speakers during lunch Friday) or workshops. And so on.

I'm not doing NaNoWriMo this year (although, for inspiration, I wore the hoodie I bought myself when I won last year), but it was a great kick-off for those doing it.

I got a ton accomplished on my WIP, and I had a great time getting there. If you ever get the chance to attend a retreat, I highly recommend it.

**Side note: Check out Larry Correia's plan for the ultimate Book Bomb at Amazon on Thursday, November 10th. Help us help Robison Wells!***

Six Free Reference Books on How to Write

2011-11-08T23:00:00.002-07:00

By Julie Wright

We've been talking a lot on this blog about education. What price would you pay to write a GREAT book. We've talked about self editing, about taking the time to go to conferences and read books on writing. We've talked about being willing to fork over a few dollars so that you can LEARN.

But that's not what I'm going to talk about today.

I know Tuesday is almost over, but this is good news, and I was afraid to wait until next Tuesday because the opportunity might be gone.

Right now you can get SIX FREE books on how to write. Seriously. FREE. I've already downloaded mine onto my Kindle. If you don't have a Kindle, that's okay because you can download a PC Kindle app.

Here is the link to start building your reference library for

FREE

If you are at all serious about writing, then you need to learn your craft. This little gift takes all your excuses taken away. Take the time to download a few books that can help fine tune you from an adequate author to a great author.

Happy reading!

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-11-07T07:05:00.002-07:00

One of our readers has submitted a query letter for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #48

Dear AGENT,

Abbey Long believes her only option after shooting her mother’s boyfriend is to run away. Not only does she run away from home, her memories, and the past—but from the law as well. What Abbey doesn’t know, is she’s a schizophrenic, who hears and sees what others do not. Making her way from town to town, Abbey travels further from help and deeper into a false reality.

Inside Abbey’s troubled mind, four distinct voices are guiding her to “the real world,” a place as mysterious as Abbey's mental condition. Abbey believes the only person who will know where and what it might be is her father. After three days of travelling with extreme paranoia, Abbey truly begins to question her decisions and the companions which dwell within her head, but by then, “the real world” is just around the corner.

Abbey shows up on her father’s doorstep, only to discover that he isn’t home, and hasn’t been for some time. Then, completing Abbey’s delusion, it suddenly all makes sense. “The real world” is death, to join her father would mean to use the very gun that began the journey. A choice will have to be made, one that will change her life forever.

VOICES UNSPOKEN, my first novel, is an edgy young adult novel complete at 43,000 words.

Thank you very much for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

AUTHOR

Write-A-Thon Winners!

2011-11-05T06:50:00.006-06:00

What a fabulous night! We hope that you were all able to get over some hurdles wherever you were in your manuscripts. We had 28 writers participate; some were starting page 1, and others were well into their books. It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you block out a section of time and hyper-focus.

And even double fabulous, our combined word count for the night was: 110,448 words

We’re excited to announce the winners . . .

Word Count Winner: Michael Young @ 9,424
(this is a few hundred words more than last year’s winner, so Michael’s 9,424 is the new all-time high)
*Michael wins either the $50 Amazon Gift Card or 30 page edit. Congrats, Michael! Amazing!

2nd Place Word Count Winner: Heather Justesen @ 9,059
*Congrats, Heather! You win a signed copy of Pumpkin Roll by Josi Kilpack (either audio or paperback, your choice)

Random Winner #1: magicalbookworm @ 2776 words
*magicalbookworm wins a signed copy of Variant by Robison Wells (hardcover)

Random Winner #2: Diana @ 5,153 words
*Diana wins a signed copy of Hazzardous Universe by Julie Wright (illustrated by Kevin Wasden)

Again, huge congrats to everyone! And have a great weekend!

Winners please email Heather Moore to coordinate details: editor (at) precisioneditinggroup (dot) com

START NOW: Write-A-Thon

2011-11-04T16:00:00.000-06:00

Ready? It's time to get this party started!

Here's a repeat of the rules-and-or-processes for tonight's write-a-thon:

1-Enter your starting time and starting word count in the comment section of this blog. Contest is open from 4:00 pm Friday, November 4 (MST) to Midnight (we'll accept word count submission in the comments until 12:15 am, November 5th.)

3-Write for four hours--set a timer if you need to! (You can take breaks, but track your time!)

4-When finished, come back to this blog and put your end time, end word count, and total words written in those 4 hours in the comment trail.

5-All "end time" posts must be posted by 12:15 a.m., Mountain Daylight Time (we're giving you 15 minutes to tally your numbers). To calculate your times based on where you live, go HERE and educate yourself about time zones.

6-Please be honest. You are your own time/word keeper, and we are trusting that none of our dearly beloved readers would sell their integrity for $50 or 30 pages :-) You must post a start comment AND an end comment to be eligible to win and have your words counted toward the total.

7-The winner--whoever has the most words written in their four hours--will be posted Saturday, November 5th here on the PEG blog. The winner will receive their choice of a $50 gift card to Amazon.com or 30 pages of a content edit from one of the Precision Editing Group editors ($60 value).

Ready, set, go...

Write-A-Thon TODAY!

2011-11-04T05:00:00.000-06:00

Today at 4:00 p.m. MST, Precision Editing Group will be sponsoring our 3rd Write-a-Thon and we're inviting writers to show us how many words you can write in 4 hours! This will also be a great kick off for those of you who are doing NaNoWriMo.

The contest will open at 4:00 Mountain Daylight Time and end at midnight (You choose the best 4 hours during that period of time, or break it up and track your time). The person who writes the most words will receive their choice of a $50 Amazon.com gift card OR a 30 page content edit by one of the Precision Editing Group Editors (value $60).

Here's how it will work:

1-The Write-a-thon will officially begin at 4:00 p.m. Mountain Daylight Time.

2-The blog titled "Write-a-Thon Starts Now!" will post at 4:00 pm MDT--you need to enter your starting time and starting word count in the comment section of the blog when you begin.

3-Write for four hours--set a timer if you need to!

4-When finished, come back to the PEG blog and put your end time, end word count, and total words written in those 4 hours as another comment on the blog.

5-All "end time" posts must be posted by 12:15, Mountain Daylight Time (we're giving you 15 minutes to tally your numbers). To calculate your times based on where you live, go HERE and educate yourself about time zones.

6-Please be honest about your word count and use your time to write REAL words. You are your own time/word keeper and we are trusting that none of our dearly beloved readers would sell their integrity for $50 or 30 pages :-) You must have posted a start comment AND an end comment to be eligible to win either of the prizes.

7-The winner will be posted on Saturday, November 5th here on the PEG blog.

We'll also be adding up everyone's words, think we can hit 100,000 words in one night?

Feel free to spread the word to other writers (Facebook, Twitter, personal blogs), wherever they may live--send them here to read up on the specifics. This contest is open to anyone, anywhere. While the prizes are a perk, the true challenge is to see how much you can do in a four hour period of time dedicated to writing. Order pizza for the kids, turn off the phone, TIVO Letterman, and let your fingers go.

*Please ask any questions here, we'll answer them as soon as possible.

Write-A-Thon is Tomorrow!

2011-11-03T16:05:00.000-06:00

Join us for our 3rd Write-A-Thon TOMORROW, November 4th.

Prizes include $50 Amazon Gift Card, 30 page edit, and various bestselling novels.

All the details can be found on our previous post.

Conjunction, Junction: Real Functions

2011-11-02T08:00:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

First, an important item of business:

For those doing NaNoWriMo (and for anyone else needing a writing boost), Precision Editing Group is again doing a write-a-thon to kick off the month.

It'll be held THIS Friday, November 4th. Win books, or write the most words and be the grand prize winner, receiving either a FREE $50 edit or a $50 Amazon gift card.

Details HERE.

And now for today's post!

Sometimes it's the small things that make all the difference, and it's one of those things we'll discuss today.

A common issue I see in my editing work is awkward use of conjunctions. You know, those little words that, to go all School House Rock on you, hook up "words, and phrases and clauses."

Let's refresh our memories:

Okay, so to review a list of common conjunctions. You know them: AND, OR, FOR, NOR, YET, BUT, SO.

For our purposes, we'll focus on three: AND, BUT, SO

We'll also mention a couple of other connector words that aren't technically conjunctions but are often used in similar awkward ways:

WHICH and THAT

AND

This conjunction adds two things together. Any time you use it, the text should be saying this PLUS that.

For example: Jane at an apple and a banana.

Here, Jane ate, and she ate two things. AND works.

This also works: At school, Jane took a test and worked in the science lab.

Again, we have a single action: Jane went to school. While there, she did two things. This AND that.

The problem I see often is when writers combine two things that don't go together in a natural addition:

Jane wanted to try and talk to her teacher.

I've mentioned this one before. TRY should jump out at you and demand a TO after it. AND implies two things, but here, Jane's doing ONE thing. She is attempting to speak to her teacher. That's it. But the phrasing says she's doing two things: TRYING and TALKING. That's not what we mean. It reads clunky.

While the reader may understand, there's always the chance of confusion, or at least getting yanked out of the story.

Another example:

Jane went to the police station to report the crime and ate lunch.

Here, it sounds like Jane ate lunch at the police station. Unless she's eating in the detectives' break room, I suggest adding THEN or adding a new sentence altogether.

BUT

This word implies a reversal. We start out with A and then B gets thrown at us instead.

This works: Jane hoped she did well in her audition, BUT she didn't get the part.

We get the set-up in the first half (she hoped she did well) and then the reversal (she didn't get the part).

I often see writers using BUT almost like AND, where there really isn't a reversal.

Another, even more common, mistake is where a writer uses AND (which, remember, implies an ADDITIONAL item) where we really have reversal and BUT should be used:

Jane hoped she did well in her audition, and she didn't get the part.

Can you see how AND in this case doesn't flow like the example with BUT? We aren't adding something to Jane's actions or desires; we're describing an action with an expectation, and then a reversal. We need BUT, not AND.

This one implies causality. THIS causes THAT. In many cases, AND could be used, but very often, SO is more effective and conveys the meaning so much better.

Consider the difference between the examples below.

This could work, but it's not as strong as it could be:

Jane didn't get the part, AND that night she ate a bunch of ice cream.

But this one connects the two thoughts clearly with cause and effect:

Jane didn't get the part, SO that night she ate a bunch of ice cream.

WHICH and THAT

These words elaborate on a thought or clarify a subject:

Jane tried out for the play, WHICH would run during December.

Here, WHICH gets attached to thoughts with an explanation that isn't necessary to understand the sentence. In the example above, it's nice to know when the play would run, but it's not critical to understanding the point.

Jane auditioned for the part THAT she felt she had the best shot at.

In this sentence, THAT restricts the meaning to something specific, here, to a specific role: the one Jane tried out for. Maybe the play is Into the Woods, and she tried out for Cinderella, not the Baker's Wife or Little Red. In this case, THAT makes the sentence specific, and it's needed.

It's easy to throw in lots of useless THATs. But there are also cases when the word is needed, and restrictive clauses are one of them.

For the grammar nerds: remember that these two words aren't conjunctions, so you use them in situations where one clause can't stand on its own as a sentence rather than between two independent clauses.

I've said it many times, but it's a truism that remains: Getting the small things right will set your work apart from the rest of the pack. Something as simple as clunky conjunction use can signal to an agent or editor that you don't have a solid grasp on writing mechanics, relegating your submission to the circular file.

The great news is that this particular issue is easy to fix. Look at your conjunctions to see if they mean what you intend. Change them out as needed. You'll be glad you did.

Tip: Watch the School House Rock clip again. Pay close attention to how the conjunctions are used, especially AND, BUT, and SO.

It's baaaack . . . Write-A-Thon Contest!

2011-10-26T14:46:00.000-06:00

On Friday, November 4, 2011, Precision Editing Group will be sponsoring our 3rd Write-a-Thon, and we're inviting writers to show us how many words you can write in 4 hours! This will also be a great kick off for those of you who are doing NaNoWriMo.

The contest will open at 4:00 Mountain Daylight Time and end at midnight (You choose the best 4 hours during that period of time, or break it up and track your time). The person who writes the most words will receive their choice of a $50 Amazon.com gift card OR a 30 page content edit by one of the Precision Editing Group Editors ($60 value). Other prizes will be awarded to various winners, which include an autographed copy of Variant by Robison Wells, and an autographed copy of Pumpkin Roll by Josi S. Kilpack.

Here's how it will work:

1-The Write-a-Thon will officially begin at 4:00 Mountain Daylight Time on Friday, November 4, 2011.

2-The blog titled "Start Now: Write-a-Thon" will post at 4:00 MDT--you need to enter your starting time and starting word count in the comment section of the blog when you begin.

3-Write for four hours--set a timer if you need to! You can break up your four hours, but please do not exceed four hours of total writing time.

4-When finished, come back to the PEG blog and put your end time, end word count, and total words written in those 4 hours as another comment on the blog.

5-All "end time" posts must be posted by 12:15 a.m. that night (technically Nov 5), Mountain Daylight Time (we're giving you 15 minutes to tally your numbers). To calculate your times based on where you live, go HERE and educate yourself about time zones.

6-Please be honest about your word count and use your time to write REAL words. You are your own time/word keeper and we are trusting that none of our dearly beloved readers would sell their integrity for $50 or 30 pages :-) You must have posted a start comment AND an end comment to be eligible to win either of the prizes.

7-The winner will be posted on Saturday, November 5th here on the PEG blog.

We'll also be adding up everyone's words. We're hoping to hit 100,000 words in one night.

Feel free to spread the word to other writers (Facebook, Twitter, personal blogs), wherever they may live--send them here to read up on the specifics. This contest is open to anyone, anywhere. While the prizes are a perk, the true challenge is to see how much you can do in a four hour period of time dedicated to writing. Order pizza for the kids, put the cell phone on silent, TIVO Letterman, and let your fingers go.

*Please ask any questions here, we'll answer them as soon as possible.

Dear Author . . .

2011-10-25T09:05:00.000-06:00

By Julie Wright

“I spent a bit of time perusing the Dear Author for the romance category boards over on Amazon. It was hilarious . . . until it wasn't.

I'm in the process of editing one of my earlier manuscripts that I've received my rights back from the publisher. I knew the writing was rough because I was young when I wrote the book and inexperienced as a writer. I had no idea how bad it truly was until I got two sentences into the edit.

Sad that it only took two sentences for me to start rolling my eyes. I actually would have been eye-rolling at the first four words except I was too shocked to be capable of the eye-roll.

I made a lot of mistakes in those first books, mistakes that would instigate the words, "Dear author . . . Please don't . . ."

It's important to remember your audience and to read enough in the genre in which you're writing so you understand the cliche's and sand-traps of that genre. Basically, what I'm saying is . . . learn your craft.

I was so glad to have been published with those first couple of books, so excited to be an "author," that I jumped in before I was ready. Was it a mistake? Maybe. Maybe I never would have published and worked to get better if I hadn't had those first books come out the way they did. Or maybe I would have kept writing until I grew in my craft and had a first book release that would have stunned the world. Who knows? Twelve novels later, I am a much different writer today than I was ten years ago. I hope to keep improving and growing and BECOMING. For now, I am editing and eye-rolling. And paying close attention to notes like, "dear author . . ."

Feel free to peruse the Dear Author board on Amazon for yourself:

Dear Author . . .

And do you have any memos you wish you could say to authors in general? Things you wish they'd stop doing or do more of?

Time Warps

2011-10-19T09:04:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Throughout your story, time will pass. Story time, that is. (Even more time will pass as you write it, but that's another topic.)

Handling time can be tricky, and if it's done poorly, your reader may get confused, annoyed, and, quite possibly, put the story down. Here are the most common ways writers mishandle time that I see as an editor:

Back Story Dumps

This is one of the most common ways to mismanage time: dwelling on back story, especially in the first couple of chapters. Get to the now of the story right away. Give us whatever information we need from the past in small bites (usually later), and probably less back story than you think we need. We've talked about this one elsewhere, so we'll jump to the other time problems.

Flashbacks

While I'd never say you can't use a flashback (few writing rules are so solid you can actually say "never" to them), I would say to be wary of them and, when using them, learn to do so well.

A few flashback tips:

1) Make the transitions into and out of the flashback crystal clear so the reader can follow easily. We need to know where and when we are at all times.

2) Keep the flashbacks short and few. Lots of flashbacks aren't a story. You don't want your novel to get mired in what led up to this point; tell us what's happening now. That's where the current conflict (and therefore, what your reader will care about) lies.

3) Use flashbacks with a clear purpose, deliberately, when you've gone through other techniques and are sure that there's no other way to effectively accomplish what your story needs. Don't fall back on this technique as your default. Chances are, the easiest way to tell the story isn't going to be the most effective.

Flashbacks Within Flashbacks

Laugh if you will, but I do see this. A flashback all by itself has the potential for confusing the reader about what happened and when. Adding a second flashback inside the first is doubly confusing. If the second flashback includes time words like "two weeks ago," we have no idea what's going on; is that two weeks prior to the second flashback? Is the second flashback two weeks prior to the first? Or is this two weeks before the main story line? Confusing? You bet. It's also sloppy.

Rewinding.

This is when, for example, Scene A covers the time from 3 to 6PM, and then the writer goes on to write Scene B, but backs up in time and repeats some or most of what happened in scene A, only from a different POV.

Here's the problem: After reading scene A, which ends at 6PM, most readers (understandably, since in our lives, time moves forward) will assume the time is 6PM (or later).

Rewinding is jarring in the extreme. Readers expect time to flow one direction unless clearly told otherwise. So if that expectation is violated, the reader gets pulled out, has to reorient, and only then move forward. You've just given the reader the perfect chance to close the cover and walk away.

In one rewinding case I saw, two characters see one another for the second time. We first see the brief meeting from the man's point of view. He went on to have a pretty long scene with other events. So when the next scene began, from the woman's point of view, I assumed an hour or two (at least) had passed.

The scene read fine that way at first. But halfway through, the door opens, and she sees the man. I assumed this was their third meeting. It wasn't until a page or two later that I realized that oh, this is meeting #2, and we're seeing it for a second time.

Among the problems with this particular story: The second viewing didn't add a thing.

As with flashbacks, there's no hard and fast rule to avoid this technique, but I'd caution against it even more than with flashbacks.

Rewinding: A Caveat

As an editor, I have seen rewinding done well . . . a total of one time.

In that case, it worked for several reasons:

1) When we jumped from Character A to Character B, the section was labeled with the B character's name clearly identified as the POV character. I knew right away that we'd changed locations and POV, and when the time shifted too, I was ready for it.

2) Although we were reliving a time period, a significant amount of Character B's story didn't feature Character A at all. For the most part, we weren't seeing the same scenes, just the same time period.

3) During the moments where we were repeating a scene, we got a brand new perspective with new, important information. Both perspectives were crucial to the story.

4) We weren't ping ponging back and forth; each section was several chapters long, so we had a significant amount of time with each POV before swapping to the other.

In the first case (that didn't work), none of these items were present.

1) We simply moved to the next scene with no marker or header telling us where (or when!) we were.

2) We relived not only the same time period, but the exact same moment.

And the kicker:

3) The two characters' perspectives weren't different enough to add a single thing to the story.

A rule of thumb regarding POV:

Use the point of view of the character who has the most to lose in any given scene.

A corollary:

That means you can't pick two characters to use and then show the scene twice.

As an exercise, feel free to write both. Then see which is the most effective and choose the better scene. I can guarantee that one of the two will be better than the other. Use that.

Then throw the other one away.

Handling time in fiction, especially in something as lengthy as a novel, can be tricky. Avoid the pitfalls of back story dumps, flashbacks (plus flashbacks within flashbacks), and rewinding, and you'll have eliminated a lot of potholes, making your story much smoother reading.

"I'm a Bit Stubborn"

2011-10-12T09:00:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Writing, whether it's your occupation, hobby, or passion, brings with it challenges that I believe are unique to the creative arts.

Among them is an intense connection to your work, almost as if your words are an extension of yourself, your heart, your very being.

That can pose a huge problem, but here are two of the most common ways:

1) You are too afraid to get feedback.

It's very hard to put your work out there for other people to see, then ask them for an opinion, especially since writing can be so subjective. It's like someone telling you your baby is ugly, and it's all your fault.

2) You refuse to accept feedback.

Yes, writing is subjective . . . to a point. But when alpha/beta readers, critique partners, and editors continue to return with similar feedback (this is confusing, show this, the pace is lagging, whatever), maybe there's really a problem.

Maybe you can really improve.

A truth for success in writing: being pig-headed gets you absolutely nowhere.

Those writers who seek help, who are open to suggestion and change, who recognize that maybe they aren't yet ready to put up a shelf for their incoming Pulitzer, who continually strive to improve: those are the writers who will eventually succeed.

I recently met a man who is an aspiring writer and actor. As we talked, it became clear that the main reason he hasn't found any success in either endeavor is that he refuses to seek or accept feedback.

With his writing, he simply will not let others so much as suggest he add a comma. No one is allowed to give criticism of any kind (editors and writing teachers are "full of themselves," you see). He has no industry connections at all, and therefore doesn't understand how the industry works. He doesn't take time for his craft. He simply expects success to land in his lap.

As we talked, he explained that he can't stand being told what to do. "I'm a bit stubborn," he admitted, as if that's an admirable quality.

Stubbornness can be a good thing; to some extent, it's what helped me get as far as I have in my career. I'm stubborn enough to not give up.

But that's not the kind of stubborn he was talking about. He refuses feedback, suggestions, change, and any hint that he maybe he'd get further by going about doing things differently.

Yet he asked my advice about how to improve, succeed, and find industry connections. I had a sneaking suspicion that he didn't really want to hear what I was going to say.

First I asked, "Have you been to any writing conferences?"

"Oh, no. I don't have time for conferences or any of that stuff."

Since we'd met all of ten minutes earlier, I might have been too bold in my response, but it slipped out anyway: "Then you don't have time to be a writer."

After a slightly awkward pause, he said, "Yeah, I hear that. But . . ."

And he kept going on about how he's such a great writer and doesn't want (or need) to be told what to do.

When he heard about how many books I've published, he asked if I could connect him with friends in the industry to get him published.

My first reaction (which I didn't verbalize), was to list all the work I've done to reach the point I'm at. We're talking about close to two decades of hard, consistent work. Work I'm still doing. Success doesn't just happen.

I tried to explain that no one can help him in the way he wants. Even if I handed him my editor's cell phone number, it would do him no good. I can make suggestions and recommendations to industry friends (and I have).

Every so often the recommendation leads to a contract. In one case, the writer I passed the information on about had been actively working, hard, for years. It was a good fit, and I could whole-heartedly recommend them to my editor. It worked out only because the writer's skill, work ethic, and professionalism were already in place. They likely would have made it eventually without my putting a finger into the situation.

But I've made other recommendations that haven't ended up in a contract. I can suggest all I want, but in the end, I have zero control over what an editor or publisher does. I've been recommended by others too, but that guarantees nothing.

As the conversation went on, it became quite clear that he didn't know some of the most basic things about writing or publishing, things he could have picked up and learned with a simple Google search (or heck, by reading the archives right here).

I left the conversation guessing that whatever dreams he has will never become a reality because he refuses to be teachable.

If you hope to be published and have success, you need outside feedback (good luck ever publishing a novel if you refuse to be edited; your publisher will drop you like a hot potato).

I don't care if you think you're the best gift to literature since Shakespeare; you need to improve and learn what that means for your work.

You need to reach out and make the connections. Don't isolate yourself in a tower and think you know best when others can support you and help you thrive.

Don't think you have all the answers. I can guarantee that whoever you are, you don't.

Learn the ins and outs and expectations of what a writer does, how publishing works, and what that means for you personally.

If you're serious about writing, you'll never be in a place to sit on your laurels.

Don't look down your nose at someone who is suggesting that maybe this part of your story might work better if you revised. They just might know what they're talking about. And remember: they're trying to help you, not pull you down.

Bottom line: Learn what it means to be a professional. And then behave like one.

How Much is This Gunna Cost Me?

2011-10-07T07:57:00.000-06:00

By Josi S. Kilpack

Awhile back I was approached by someone who'd just finished their first book. I'm always excited to encourage other writers and share the excitement of such an accomplishment. The woman then asked me what she should do next. I asked if she'd attended any writer's conferences and she said "Oh, those are so pricey, I couldn't afford that." I went on to tell her of some up and coming conferences that are very reasonably priced. "Oh, that's way too much money. What else can I do?"
So I told her of some free options: read writing blogs, find comparable books to what she's written and figure out who published them, follow agents on Facebook and Twitter, join a writing group. She asked how she would find a writing group and the first thought that came to mind was where I've met several members of the writing groups I've belonged to--writing conferences. But she'd already nixed that option, and yet it was the answer I had. So I told her and she, again, reminded me that she could never possibly come up with $100 to attend a writer's conference. I mentioned joining The League of Utah Writers which has monthly meetings, she asked (can you guess?) "How much would that cost?"
"About $25 a year."
She shook her head and explained, again, that there was no way she could pay anything. At that point I smiled and wished her luck. I watched her leave and wished I could have made her see beyond her determination that she couldn't afford the best options out there. The thought that's come back to me ever since is "How can she afford not to invest in something that's obviously so important to her?" The exchange has sat with me ever since and therefore here I am pontificating about it you guys.

On the one hand, I understand that there are people in some really tough financial situations. They are struggling to pay their mortgage and worry about the upcoming winter. They are working hard to make ends meet and there is no room for anything extra. I remember when I laid awake at night wondering how on earth I was going to pay the power bill. I would never tell anyone to pay for a conference instead of filling their children's cavities and I carry no judgment for them not seeing room in their budgets to invest in something far below milk and bread on their list.

On the other hand, I really don't know how anyone can expect and hope to make a career in writing without making an investment in it somewhere. IF you want writing to be a career, IF you want it to pay you money someday, there are going to be expenses. Here are some of the basic things that a writer can expect to spend money on:
*A decent computer
*A backup service of some kind for that computer
*Software--Microsoft Word is the standard right now
*Printer Ink for printing manuscripts (though with e-submission this isn't what it once was)
*Paper for printing on
*Writing Books--there are some you'll want to own for future reference
*Postage for mailing things
*Dues for writers organizations--At $25/year, that's $2.00/monthly meeting
*Writer's Conferences--in my opinion this is where you get the most bang for your buck

To me, this list is essential. It provides you with somewhere to write and store your words, mediums to send those words out, and opportunities to learn not only about the craft, but about the career you're striving toward. Without investing in these things it will be difficult for you to learn all the nuances of the writing profession. That said, there are some solutions that don't require big buck investments:

*Computer. A friend of mine wrote for many years using two very old computers. One hard drive was used for writing, the other one was connected to the main computer and backed up everything from the first computer, which meant he had two hard drives with his book on them. It took some technical know-how to set it up but cost him about $100.
*Software. Most computers come with a word processing software. If yours doesn't, or if you're still working off of Word 2000, look on eBay for discounted upgrades. If you need to (or feel better about) buying new, look for a student copy, assuming you have a student in your household. It can save you a lot of money.
*Ink and postage can be use minimally if you do all your editing on the computer and focus on e-doc submissions and critique sharing.
*Writing books. Check your library sales or check thrift stores, but understand that books on writing are very niche and therefore hard to find amid the general mass of books out there; you might get lucky though. Many of my favorite titles sell for less than $5 on Amazon.
*Dues for Writing Organizations. Would mom pay your dues as your birthday present every year? Can you sell something on eBay. Get creative.
*Writing Conferences. Sometimes you can volunteer to help with the conference and get a discount, but you really need to know people before they will trust you to be helpful. You can also ask for the admission as a gift from people in your life, or save up for it. Don't feel like you have to travel to another state or go to a conference every month to benefit--one writer's conference a year close to home is a great start.

The fact is that a writing career isn't free. It takes time and it will take some money and each person has to figure out what they can do. However, if the book you're writing is worthy of the time you put into it, isn't it worth the necessary financial investment it will take to make it the best it can be? You don't have to fly to Maui, you don't have to have your own personal writing library or buy the newest computer out there, but you do need to ask yourself what you can do, and then you need to do it.

Also, keep in mind that once you get published, the expenses will increase and you don't get paid right away--unless you get an advance. You will have to carry expenses for awhile before you get paid anything even after your book is out there so finding a way to work some of these things into your current budget will help prepare you for that end.

Happy Writing!

What I See Most Often

2011-09-28T14:31:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

As an editor, I see a lot of the same things. If you can avoid these few issues in your work, you'll automatically be a step ahead of the competition.

Here are three of the most common problems I see:

Back-story Dump

Also known as "info dump." This is when the story comes to a screeching halt so we can learn the characters' history, what led up to this moment, and so on. It includes flashbacks, long strings of thought, dialog where characters recap the past (things they already know and likely wouldn't actually say to one another), and so on.

At the beginning of a story, this is a real problem. Back story may be important, although I'm betting it's less important than you think. We really don't want to hear about it in the first chapter. If the reader needs information from the past, tell us in small pieces . . . later.

Point of View Problems

I highly recommend reading Orson Scott Card's book Character and Viewpoint as a primer for learning how point of view works, how to pick the right one, and how to use it well.

Common POV problems I see include head-hopping, picking the wrong POV, having no point of view whatsoever, and having inconsistent POV characterization. POV problems pull the reader out of the story. They can make the narrative confusing. When handled well, POV helps the reader get immersed in the story.

Telling Instead of Showing

Show, don't tell, is such a common piece of advice it's almost cliche, but it's crucial. Telling creates a shallow story with flat characters. Instead of readers feeling and experiencing the story, getting wrapped up into it, they'll remain at a distance, as if reading a summary.

Good showing appears on the sentence and paragraph level (what I call micro showing) and in the overall scene, chapter, and full-length work level (what I call macro showing).

Interestingly enough, back story dumps and POV problems are often also telling problems. If you learn how to avoid these three common weak spots, you'll automatically find yourself knowing how to fix a lot of problems in your work--and avoid them altogether in the future.

Press Releases: Find Your Hook

2011-09-28T09:18:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Whether you've published with a traditional press or are going the indie route, a lot of promotion for your book will be on your shoulders.

In an attempt to get featured on television, radio, magazines, and newspapers, writers generally put together press releases and send them out, hoping for the best.

Problem: The vast majority of press releases will end up in the circular file, never to be read or passed along . . . or acted upon to give you any attention in the media.

There are several reasons why. One is that media outlets are bombarded with press releases. They simply have too many to wade through.

Another reason is that hundreds (if not thousands or tens of thousands) of writers send out press releases, and they all look the same. If a release doesn't stand out (as in, really stand out), it'll be ignored completely.

REALITY: Being a novelist doesn't mean you automatically know how to write a good press release.

Study up on the standard press-release format, including things like the headline, date, contact information, and even where to put the little ### symbols.

Of course, read it aloud, proof it meticulously, and then seek out the best people to send it to.

But before you write it in the first place . . .

Find your media hook, or your press release is already dead in the water.

The news is just that: NEWS. It's interesting information that the media think their audiences will want to hear and learn about. Write your press release with news in mind.

On the wall of a local news station I was at once, I saw a poster that was a reminder to the correspondents. It listed the most common things viewers care about (I think it was something like the 50 top subjects). Reporters were encouraged to use those topics as launching points when coming up with ideas for the news stories.

The types of things on the poster were all things that impact viewers' lives. I don't remember them all, but they included things like nutrition, safety, little-known hazards, heroes, health studies, recalls, environment, politics, warnings, and so on.

In other words: what will the viewers want to hear about because they already care?

I can guarantee you that "Local Author Publishes Novel" isn't going to cut it. Sure, your neighbors might care. But they probably already know your news. But who else will bother reading that?

Non-fiction is typically easier to sell for press releases than fiction, because often the hook is in the topic itself. A how-to book on finances, for example, could launch a spotlight on the author with a few of the tips from the book. But even then, the press release isn't about "expert on finances publishes book" so much as "expert reveals 25 sure-fire ways to get out of debt." And those ways happen to be in the book.

In other words, your hook should be something you could imagine on that poster. (Who out there isn't impacted on some level by money? Right.)

To get any kind of media attention with a novel, you need a news hook that is something people already care about.

Several years ago, Precision Editing's own Josi Kilpack was on a local morning talk show with her novel Sheep's Clothing. Her hook was the underlying concept behind the plot: the dangers of internet predators and how to keep our children safe. (And then as a post script: "Oh, and the book is about an internet predator. It's a great suspenseful read. Check it out.")

Are internet predators a current topic? Does it (or at least, the worry of it) affect a lot of viewers?

Let's see . . . it impacts any viewer with an internet connection and a child somewhere in their lives. Pretty much everyone.

Note that Josi's appearance was more about the issue and less about the book.

The same thing applied when I made it onto two local television shows and two radio interviews, plus some newspapers, while promoting my novel Band of Sisters.

The focus of the press release and the spots was on a charity that helps military families, something I learned about while researching the book and then joined forces with. The novel is about deployment. I included a page in the back about the charity, the Flat Daddy organization. I raised money for military families through my blog. On radio and television, I talked mostly about the charity and what people can do to help military families. The hosts mentioned the novel on the side.

We snagged one TV spot with a press release about the Flat Daddy charity, but when I got there, all the hosts asked me about was the book. Which was nice, although totally unexpected.

When writing your press release, find a new hook that reporters can latch onto. Make it something viewers or readers will want to find more about. It must be relevant to the viewer, not just to you because you love your book.

Sometimes that could mean writing a guest editorial about a topic (like finances) instead of doing a press release, then mentioning your book in the bio line.

But whatever you do, remember to never, ever use a headline that mentions just you, your book, and that gee, wow, you published one. That isn't news, and it won't get covered except, perhaps, in tiny local papers with a brief mention (which won't sell you any books).

Why should the media care? Why will their viewers and readers care? Hook them with a news story about something that matters.

Then make sure it's a crisp, clean press release, and you just upped the chances that they'll bite.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-09-26T08:16:00.000-06:00

One of our readers has submitted a query letter for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #47

Dear (Agent),

How do you let go of the past when it haunts you every day? Nearly a year ago, 17-year-old Allie Collins almost drowned in a river by her family’s summer cabin. Failing to rescue her young cousin, Allie harbors her anguish and guilt, carrying them with her into a lonely existence. Forced to return to the cabin, Allie struggles with her grief as well as her complicated family dynamics. She is intrigued when she hears the rumor of how a family mysteriously died some years ago, not far from where her own tragedy occurred. Feeling strangely connected to the story, Allie sets out to discover the truth behind the secrecy. Meanwhile, Allie meets Damien, a local rebel with a shielded past. Drawn by Damien’s uncanny ability to help Allie share her darkest emotions, she embraces this relationship with little heed to the warnings from her friends and family. By the time Allie unearths the secrets of Damien’s youth, she discovers just how intricately they are connected, and is caught in a dangerous battle that threatens her life and those she loves.

Hidden Pines is a contemporary young adult novel that depicts a journey between heartbreak and healing, while testing friendship, loyalty, and love. My experience working with youth as a Recreational Therapist allows me to incorporate values and relevant themes that will entice young adult readers.

I look forward to sharing my 90,000 word manuscript with you. As instructed in your submission guidelines, I have included three sample chapters.

With appreciation,
(Author)

The Middle of Nowhere

2011-09-20T15:26:00.000-06:00

I live in the literal middle of nowhere. Getting to my house is one of those experiences where you start out thinking about how fun the road trip is going to be. You take off with your snacks, and your drinks, and your awesome music you can sing along with. But once you leave the freeway and enter the highway, things feel less promising than they did when you took off. You're moving slower because the speed limits are so incredibly lamely LOW, and sometimes you get stuck behind semi trucks who make the lame low speed limit look like Nascar, and the scenery doesn't feel like it's changing. It's more of the same thing over and over and over. And sometimes you get stuck out there in the middle--due to cattle or sheep, or rolled semi trucks (it happens). Sometimes you get stuck for a long time and it totally bites because there isn't even any cell service.

People show up at my house and come panting in my living room and plopping down on my couch with great exclamations of how they NEVER thought they would get there.

I get them a drink and lament American highways with them because it's the right thing to do. It really is a long drive--necessary for me, but long.

Writing feels similar sometimes.

You get this great idea--this epic, amazing, you-can't-believe-the-idea-actually-came-to-you idea, and you take off, writing furiously. You've got your snacks, your drinks, your best writing music, and you are so excited about what you're working on, you can barely keep the grin off your face. You know that the ending of this work will be colossal, amazing. You're thrilled with how fantastic the destination of the end of your book will be for readers of all ages. You are going to change the world.

Until you find yourself in what feels like the two-lane-highway-stuck-behind-a-semi-truck part of your book.

Welcome. You've now reached the middle.

And you start to doubt.

Is this really where you wanted to go anyway? What's so great about reaching "the end?" Maybe that beginning was the mistake. Maybe you took a wrong turn somewhere . . .

So instead of writing, you rearrange your pen collection, get up for a different snack--you were sick of chips anyway and realize carrot sticks might be healthier. You punch some buttons on the remote control to see what might be on.You call your friends and see about going to a movie, but they're busy writing--jerks, and then you decide that health is overrated, and you wanted ice cream instead.

There are some things you can do to pass the semi--clear the flock off the road, and get back to the freeway that will take you where you want to go.

Boring:
Are you bored? If you're bored, I promise, your reader is too. If that's the reason the middle's slowing down, then you might want to insert some action, some peril, something that incites your characters and your readers. Put them in danger, make the girl lose the guy, have the murderer strike again while the detective is still scrambling with clues. Make something happen that propels the action and the plot forward again.

Goals:
Does your character not have clearly defined goals so your characters are kind of wandering around in the misty middles of nowhere because they're not sure what to do next? if this is the case, go back and find something your character desperately wants or is desperately passionate about. That is the goal. Keep them moving toward the goal, which will help move them away from the middle and closer to the end. Make sure the goal is big enough that the readers will care if the goal is achieved. If the quest is merely for a pint of ice cream--you might not be able to get the reader to follow the journey to the end. Make it riveting enough to hold your attention.

Make sure your antagonist has a clear goal too. No one is evil just for the sake of evil. They have things they want and are trying desperately to achieve.

I have a tendency to get lost in my manuscripts about page 60, and then again at page 120. But I've always found that it's because I've lost sight of the goal or failed to keep the action and plot moving. Middles don't have to feel like the boring nowheres they sometimes seem to be. Take the scenic route and turn your music up louder. And remember to have fun with it!

Give me a Break!

2011-09-16T07:00:00.000-06:00

By Josi Kilpack

Just like in real life, a "break" in a manuscript is a pause, a format-spoken note to your reader's subconscious telling them what to expect next. Using them correctly will give the right signal, and knowing the terms they are called by will help you better communicate to other industry people.

There are actually two types of Line Breaks, or at least two ways I have found them to be used. The definition I'm most familiar with is basically the hard return at the end of a line that starts a new paragraph. This type of break is used all the time in fiction, if we didn't use it we'd have one very long and confusing paragraph. The correct way to use a line break is to signal the end of a paragraph and to signal a new speaker in dialogue. For instance, you wouldn't format dialogue this way:

"But what about the dog? What are we going to do about that @#!*% dog?" her voice was rising in direct proportion to her frustration. "We'll sell it, or give it away. We can do it while the kids are at school and tell them it ran off." "Do you really think they'll fall for it?" "Trust me. I'll take them to ice cream and buy them a new Wii game. I doubt they'll even notice."

Without line breaks we have a hard time following the discussion which should read:

"But what about the dog? What are we going to do about that @#!*% dog?" her voice was rising in direct proportion to her frustration.
"We'll sell it, or give it away. We can do it while the kids are at school and tell them it ran off."
"Do you really think they'll fall for it?"
"Trust me. I'll take them to ice cream and buy them a new Wii game. I doubt they'll even notice."

The other way that the term line break is used is when you have a significant change but not a new chapter--I call these Hard Breaks to keep it clearer in my own head. A significant change is usually point of view or setting and it should be signaled to the reader by centering three asterisks *** between the last line of the previous text and the first line of "change". It is very important that you use three asterisks, not two and not four, and that it's centered. The typesetter uses this as a signal for their formatting so use it correctly in your manuscript. The important part to remember is that hard breaks should only be used for a significant change, which invites the question of whether or not the change should be the start of a new chapter instead of a hard break. I, personally, dislike hard breaks very much. I use them on occasion, but only if the significant change results in too short a chapter. I dislike reading books with lots of *** because though I'm being warned of the change, I question if it was really necessary. Specifically, when you are in one scene and the *** signals jumping between POV characters still in that scene I find it usually wasn't the best choice. I prefer that each scene belong to one POV character, usually the character who has the most to lose in that scene--but that is only my opinion and not an element of craft. Any time you use a hard break, ask yourself if it should be a new chapter. If the answer is no, make sure you really need to make the significant change. If the answer is yes, then be sure to format it correctly with three centered asterisks.

Sometimes, you'll see an extra line between paragraphs. This is typically referred to as a Soft Break but is sometimes called a Section Break as well. Often, the use of soft breaks is a style issue with individual writers and is used to signal a less-significant change. That means that you're in the same POV character, same setting, and the 'focus' of that portion of the plot is also the same. Most often, soft breaks work well to show that time has passed. Whenever it is used, you should question yourself to make sure it's necessary. Because it is such a strong visual cue to the reader, you want to make sure that you use it correctly.

The final break is a Page Break. A page break should only ever be used to start a new chapter, AND even that is questionable. Many editors and agents want the Chapters to be continuous and not break at the end of a page. If you do want to make a page break, don't simply hit the return key until you get to a new page. If you should add anything above those empty returns, they will push those returns down as well, throwing off your alignment. Instead, if using Word on a PC go to the end of the text in that chapter and then push the ctrl key and the enter key at the same time. On a Mac, press the apple key and the enter key located next to the apple key on the right side of the keyboard, not the return key. This will take you to the first line of the next page. You can also add breaks through the 'insert' drop down of the menu, but it's much easier to use the shortcut. Be sure to check submission guidelines to make sure that page breaks for new chapters are acceptable. If they don't say anything, then you can assume it's allowed.

Proper formatting is a cue to your editor that you know what you're doing and anything that increases their confidence in you is a very good thing. Happy Writing!

Reader Etiquette

2011-09-14T08:00:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Writers are avid readers. (At least, they all should be.)

In today's interconnected world, that means entirely new things for the reader/writer relationship.

When I was a kid, I didn't necessarily have any idea who the authors of the books I read were, beyond a tiny bio at the back of a book, and a photo if I was lucky. The authors could have been dead half the time, for all I knew. (And many were.)

Today, however . . .

Almost all writers are a few clicks away on the computer. There's a very good chance your favorite writer has a website, blog, a Facebook page, and a Twitter account (or at least some combination of those things).

A side note: all writers should have some kind of online presence, even if it's a single bio page and an email address for publicists, book stores, and others to be able to reach you, such as if you've been nominated for an award.

Authors often interact with their readers through social media. Many writers have huge followings. Neil Gaiman has such a large Twitter following that often when he posts a link, the server on the other end crashes, leading to the Twitter hash tag #neilwebfail.

How writers can or should use social media isn't the point of this post, however.

The point is how you as a reader should approach writers online.

In the simplest terms, just remember two things:

1) The person on the other end is an actual, breathing human being.

2) They have feelings, especially about their work.

That may sound obvious. But the ease with which we toss out texts, status updates, tweets, and emails, we often forget basic courtesy.

It's one thing for me to rant about why I really don't like one of Faulkner's books when he's dead and gone.

It's something else entirely to shoot off an angry email to a living, writing, publishing author, right after I read a book, if their latest release didn't live up to my expectations.

The writer ego is a tricky thing. One minute you feel like you can take on the world and can really do this literary thing.

The next second, you're ready to curl into the fetal position and rock back and forth, certain that you're an idiot for putting your work out there because it stinks and people hate it.

We writers do this to ourselves already.

We don't need the help of trigger-happy readers.

I'm not talking about readers giving honest reviews on GoodReads or Amazon or on their blogs. That's part and parcel of the whole publishing gig. Writers who react poorly to bad reviews need to grow up, and never go on the attack. Not cool, people.

But it's a good reminder for all of us that when we're reading books, and the writers are out there, right now, ready to hear what we have to say (and are likely watching the internet for references to themselves, as most writers have Google alerts set up for this), they will catch what's going on. Word gets around.

And if you decide to write a hasty, angry email in the middle of the night directly to the writer? You may well regret it in the morning. And the writer may well wake up, eager for a day of writing, only to be shot down by someone the moment they check their email.

Again, I'm not implying that reviewers can't be honest. Or that readers can't contact writers. Not at all.

Reviewers serve an important role, and honest, helpful reviews go a long way. (Nasty, bitter reviews aren't useful for readers or for writers, however.)

And as a writer, I love getting reader feedback. At least I do when it's written with the understanding that I'm human, I'm not perfect, and I'm trying hard to improve.

Think of it this way: If you wouldn't say it to the author's face if you met them, don't send a DM or an email saying it either.

And to mix metaphors: If you're an aspiring writer yourself, remember that you may be in the hot seat one day, and any bridges your burn today will almost certainly come back to to bite you tomorrow.

Be kind. Be courteous. Be helpful. That doesn't mean putting on a fake face, but that does mean a bit of restraint.

And basic manners.

Congrats to Melanie Jacobson

2011-09-12T11:27:00.000-06:00

One of our blog followers, Melanie Jacobson, just had a book released called Not My Type. Congrats Melanie!

Link to first chapter here.
Purchase link here.

We're always happy to post new releases by our blog followers.

Alpha Readers and Beta Readers

2011-09-09T05:59:00.000-06:00

I was recently looking for beta readers for my most recent book when a friend of mine asked me if I had already used alpha readers. I blinked stupidly at her and told her I'd never heard the term. She explained what she meant and I realized that was basically what I used beta readers for--so we have a synonym issue; two words, same definition. Like child and kid (not the goat kind...moving on)

So, then I did a little research to see what the world at google-large thinks and here's what I found:

Alpha Reader:
*The first people to read the book, often while it's being written who help you craft the story as it develops.
*Someone who reads the book before anyone else in regard to how it works on an industry level, often a published author or expert in the genre your writing.

My comments: Well, I happen to have a writing group who helps me chapter by chapter so that means I have alpha readers--who knew? I've never used the second type of alpha reader. It sounds to me like an alpha reader would have to have some understanding of craft since they are either helping you develop the story or they are reading it as compared to other similar works. So here's my definition:

Alpha reader: Craft-savvy readers who either assist in the development of the book as it is being written, or can help with the industry-specific aspects when it is finished.

Beta Reader:
*Someone who will read the manuscript in its entirety after it's finished who will offer discerning advice on how to best prepare it for your editor.
*Not necessarily a professional editor
*Often has a specific focus, expertise, or experience.

My comments: This was my understanding of beta readers and I have a very good pool of them I alternate between for my books. I try not to overwhelm any of them by asking them to do every book because I'm writing 2+ a year. I also have a basic agreement that if they beta read for me, they get a free copy of the book AND I will reciprocate by being a beta reader for them. Some of my beta readers are writers, but not all of them. I find beta readers who are just 'readers' to be very helpful since they don't get caught up in line or craft things. That said, writers catch things that a reader never would so having a variety of perspectives is helpful. So here's my definition:

Beta Reader: Someone who reads the manuscript after its completed prior to submission who then gives feedback on the overall book based on their perspective.

A few more thoughts on beta readers:
*Have at least two. Unless your mother is Dr. Laura who will tell you the honest truth whether you like it or not, she should not be a beta reader.
*Too many beta readers can become obnoxious, you have to go through each of their feedback.
*If a beta reader doesn't give you useful feedback, consider them strongly before you send them another manuscipt.
*A good beta reader will help you identify things you couldn't see on your own.
*A great beta reader will give you suggestions on how to fix it.
*Every manuscript should go through beta readers before its submitted.

What did I miss?

Happy writing!

Pay Attention. Remember.

2011-09-07T08:00:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

One of your main jobs as a writer is to keep your eyes and ears open, all the time. You never know what random bit of information you gleaned from a newscast, documentary, conversation, novel, or something else entirely, will be just the bit you need for a story.

At various times, the following pieces of information have proven useful in my work (whether that's reading, editing, or writing), all of which I've learned from paying attention as my life moves along.

Portuguese doesn't sound like Italian.
Some houses can't have basements because of a high water table.
You can't shoot the lock off a door.
The typical length of a picture book is 32 pages.
Bleeding arteries don't trickle or run; they pump in spurts.
Many Southern California apartments don't have heating.
In-N-Out Burgers has a minimal menu.
In the Salt Lake City Airport, arriving passengers come down an escalator to meet family.
Bruises turn yellow when they've almost healed.
Almost anything can be poisonous in the right amount.
If you break your nose, you may become nauseated from blood draining into your stomach.
A canyon near my home has a great running trail, and in the fall, the trail is surrounded by gold leaves.
The carpet in a local ICU has a swirly blue pattern.
A small rock, when thrown, can cause a cut big enough to need stitches.
A childhood friend's father used to sing silly songs in a voice mimicking Kermit the Frog.

I could go on and on. If you're a curious writer, you probably could too. That's a good thing.

As a writer, you should be constantly paying attention. An incomplete list of what that can mean:

Eavesdropping on public conversations.
Noticing smells.
Paying attention to sounds, both indoors and outdoors.
Taking note of colors: on the mountains, paint on the walls, clothing, hair, etc.
Mentally cataloging quirks of speech.
Thinking up ways to describe things (sights, sensations, etc.)
Watching professionals as they work, including their behaviors, choices, and vocabulary.

And so on.

If you're the curious type, you likely run a Google search for random things at random times. You wonder "what if" and "why" and you aren't satisfied with generic answers. You look up one thing online and end up staying there for an hour, following links as you learn a bunch of new things.

Instead of apologizing for being "weird," embrace the idiosyncrasy and fill up the well of detail that's inside you.

Why? Because when you're sitting at the keyboard, getting ready write, you need a well to draw from. Of course you don't need to know everything when you sit down. Far from it. You can always leave blanks to research and fill in later. (I do that all the time.)

But if you have been actively filling up your well with vivid images, sounds, smells, and ideas, your writing will flow out of your fingers quicker and smoother than it would otherwise. You'll find yourself making connections you wouldn't have thought of otherwise. Your story will be richer.

If your well is empty, you'll have nothing to draw from.

So: Watch. Listen. Read.

Above all, pay attention and remember.

SOME FUN NEWS:

If you have heard about it yet, be sure to check out the newest writing podcast, specifically about middle-grade books. It's called Wordplay, and the three hosts are awesome: critique group member J. Scott Savage, New York Times best-selling writers James Dashner, and literary agent-turned novelist Nathan Bransford.

League Of Utah Writers: Roundup 2011

2011-08-23T14:11:00.000-06:00

In just a few weeks is Roundup 2011, presented by the League of Utah Writers.

All senior editors from PEG will be there conducting manuscript reviews (Lu Ann, Annette, Julie, Heather & Josi). You can see a list of presenters and visiting agents & editors here.

Kind of fun this year, international celebrity, "Rudy" will be there, sharing his inspirational story. Also, agent Evan Gregory (at Ethan Ellenberg Literary) and agent Eliza Rothstein (at Susan Golomb Literary) will be both be there, including editor Lisa Mangum from Shadow Mountain/Deseret Book.

To sign up for a pitch session with an agent or editor, or to sign up for a manuscript review with us, be sure to register soon to secure your spot here.

Myths and Validation

2011-08-23T13:27:00.000-06:00

By Julie Wright

I read a quote that made me laugh and cry--or at least feel like crying.

"I have always believed that writing advertisements is the second most profitable form of writing. The first, of course, is ransom notes . . ." --Philip Dusenberry

As a mass communications major, I found that absolutely hilarious. As a novelist . . . well, it hurt a little, only because it is so dang true.

I've always known I had to go into an occupation that involved writing since I wasn't good for anything else. I wanted to be in advertising--wanted to win a Clio. I wanted to write ads so awesome they'd be played during the Super Bowl. And, to be completely base about the whole thing, I wanted to make a lot of money.

And then one day I finished my first novel. The moment of completion can only be likened unto Dr. Frankenstein with his monster. I'm pretty sure I cackled like a mad man scientist, and the manuscript felt very much alive. The novel had started as a side note for me--a way to prove to some idiot naysayer that I could write a novel, but at that moment, it was everything. The feeling was so immense, I knew I would have to do it again. I needed that feeling again.

Writing became my personal drug.

It would be another several years before I learned anything about really writing. It would be another decade before I was actually any good at it. And over that time I discovered a distinction between the emotional validation that comes with writing and the monetary validation.

I once believed that writing a novel and getting it published guaranteed you big royalty checks. For the most part, that isn't true. Sure there are exceptions, but I wasn't one of them. My first check was disappointing. Then I got with a bigger publisher and my checks started coming in with actual commas in them. That was pretty exciting and I realized I could actually make a living at this.

I know some people who support their families off of their writing. I know others who can't take their families to McDonalds on their royalty checks. I started writing for a niche market. I am successful in my niche market, but it's still a niche market. I knew that going in and of course I am branching out to those larger markets. But I've heard of other authors who are out there in their huge markets, and all the potential those markets have to offer, and they make less than I do.

So why keep doing it?

There is the other validation--the one that has nothing to do with dollar signs and everything to do with achieving something great. It has something to do with that buzz that comes when you reach the end of a draft--when you took nothing and made it something.

That validation is pretty intense. The emotions that come with it can be likened to the thrill of jumping off a cliff into a void and as you fall the void turns into mountain ranges or skyscrapers or castles. And you land safely in the middle of a murder mystery, or an epic fantasy, or a hilarious contemporary romance.

Dave Wolverton always tells people that a decent living can be made at writing, and I absolutely agree. but like anything it takes work. Unless you are that entirely rare fluke, it isn't going to be something that happens overnight. One of my best friends recently got a six figure deal and that was for North American rights only. he'll do great with foreign rights and movie rights. And I am thrilled for him. But he's worked his butt off for years to get to this place. Because of the work involved--a lot of people drop out. They can't handle the time it takes to write a GREAT manuscript versus the decent-enough manuscript. They can't handle the rejections. They can't handle the waiting. That is why that other form of validation is so important. Knowing why you're doing it, knowing that it takes time to get the draft right, to get that agent, to get that publisher and then to build your audience, knowing all that makes it easier to live in the mental and emotional validation versus the monetary one.

And it make it easier to laugh at jokes like this:

Three guys are sitting in a bar.

#1 "Yeah I make $80,000 a year for a living."

#2 "Cool. What do you do for a living?"

#1 "I'm a stockbroker. How much do you make?"

#2 "I should clear $65,000 this year."

#1 "What do you do?"

#2 "I'm an architect."

The third guy has been sitting quietly staring into his beer when the others turn to him.

#2. "So what about you? What do you make a year?"

#3 "$13,000."

#1 "Oh really? So what kind of books do you write?"

Know why you're doing it, and you'll live through the myths and make it to the validation. :)

The Artistic Process of Writing

2011-08-22T15:25:00.000-06:00

by Heather Moore

Disney/Hyperion editor, Lisa Yoskowitz, says that writing is an artistic process—there is no right or wrong way to write (Writers & Illustrators for Young Readers Conference, June 2011).

In fact, when I started drafting this blog, I changed the font style and font size to what I like to write in. In her June presentation, Lisa continued to discuss various ways of plotting/drafting, which all ultimately end up with the same end result: a book.

Because every writer approaches writing differently, I find it interesting to hear about various methods. Lisa discussed several methods:

1. Character Bible

2. Outlining

3. Storyboard/diagram

4. Dive right in (or most often called “discovery”)

I fit into category #4 when I first start writing a book. As I continue to write, I find myself creating a mini Character Bible, and also jotting down plot ideas at the end of my manuscript. This seems to be the most effective way for me. Bottom line is that we all have our own methods and idiosyncrasies, just like any other artist.

If you’re a hard-core outliner, Lisa cautions writers to make sure the characters are strong, and your voice and pacing excellent. Don’t give your writing so much over to plot, but keep that balance. According to Lisa, as well as many other agents/editors I’ve heard from, she can tell by the first page if she wants to keep reading a manuscript.

Most of the time, all we get is that one page. The best exercise I’ve come up with in order to analyze whether my first pages pop out is to read a series of “first pages” from authors I love or in the genre I’m writing in. This is also a great way to study voice—that ever elusive intangible.

What are your writing methods?

Extra Eyes

2011-08-17T12:24:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Last Saturday was the first ever Precision Editing Group live critique workshop. Each of the five senior editors had a table of writers, and we spent the day reading pages aloud and helping one another improve.

(We also got a picture taken of the five of us, which you can see in the sidebar. Left to right: Lu Ann Staheli, Heather Moore, Julie Wright, me, and Josi Kilpack.)

I had a great group of writers at my table. Here we are (I'm third from the left):

We had a great time. By the end of the day, I felt that everyone at my table had a solid direction to go with their books. They knew what worked (our table was great at pointing out strengths!), what didn't quite hit the mark, and best of all, they came away know knowing why certain parts didn't land and they knew how to make their work better.

I led the discussion, but I wasn't the only one talking. Everyone got to comment on everyone else's work, and I believe they all learned something from the three elements of the day:

1) Taking a critique from others.

Learning to accept a critique helps a writer build a thicker skin and lets you view your work more objectively. It's easy to get so close to your story that you can't see what's good and what's not so good without stepping back. The best way I've found to get that distance is through receiving outside feedback.

2) Giving a critique to others.

When you put on the editor hat and must actively look at someone else's work through that lens, you're working a different creative muscle. If you're like me, you'll discover things about writing that you didn't know before. You'll see something that works well (or doesn't), and then you have to articulate why. Also, sometimes I'll see a problem in someone's work, and only then do I realize that I do the very same thing.

3) Watching other people critique a third person's work.

When different perspectives and different skill sets are put into action in front of you, you may get some of the best writing education of your life. I've had more light-bulb moments watching members of my critique group help each other than in almost any other way.

I've learned huge amounts from all three critique ways, and I believe that my table did, too, even though we had just one day together.

Kudos to the five writers at my table. Your willingness to both learn and give was inspiring, and I was impressed with your work. Keep at it!

If you haven't had this type of critique experience, find one. Joining my critique group in January of 2000 was the single best thing I did for my writing. My skills jumped ahead light years in a matter of months.

I'm sure we'll have more writing workshops in the future. Be sure to watch for any announcements, because you won't want to miss out.

New book by Annette Lyon

2011-08-16T06:40:00.001-06:00

We are happy to announce book releases here by our blog followers. Please let us know when you have a new release!

Congrats to Annette Lyon, senior editor for PEG. Her latest middle grade fantasy, The Golden Cup of Kardak, is now available for Kindle on Amazon.

Format Standards: They're A-Changin'

2011-08-10T12:12:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

As an editor, I used to be able to use a broad brush with certain formatting and punctuation rules.

With the rise of e-books, some of those rules have undergone shifts. While the market there is still too new to have concrete standards, here are a few things to keep in mind if you plan to format your manuscript as an e-book.

Em Dashes

It used to be that an em dash never had spaces before or after. Ever.

E-reading devices, however, make that a problem. They interpret the words on either side of an em dash as one word. If that lump of words and a dash land at the end of a line, the whole things wraps to the next line. This leaves an unsightly gap in the text.

There are coding solutions for that, but the most common fix is simply to add a space before and after each em dash to avoid any odd breaks. The one exception would be if the em dash is at the end of a quote where someone is interrupted, such as:

"What are you—"

In that case, you don't want the word, the dash, or the closing quotes separated. They need to be together. (So no spaces.)

Chapter Breaks

The standard rules is to always start on a new page with a hard-page break. Hitting the ENTER key a bunch of times to get to the next page didn't count, because that messes up codes and whatnot. You needed a hard-page break, made with control+enter.

I personally still prefer e-books to begin new chapters on a new "page" (at the top of the screen). There is no strict standard here, but many e-book writers and readers don't bother doing that, and instead just add a number of returns before starting with the next chapter.

If you're going with gaps instead of new pages, be sure the gaps are all the same size, such as five carriage returns each. It's also a good idea to give the reader a visual break if you aren't giving them a solid page break, so add several asterisks before the new chapter.

It's wise to create a clear difference between a section break and a chapter break, so use a smaller number of returns (say, three) between section breaks and a smaller number of asterisks (such as three for sections instead of five, used for chapter breaks).

Front Matter & Back Matter

Keep in mind how e-books are generally read: e-devices begin with Chapter One (or maybe a prologue or preface). The cover, title page, acknowledgments, dedication, contents, and more, are skipped over unless the reader clicks the BACK button to manually read them.

If it's really important to you for the reader to see something (the acknowledgments, for example), put it at the end of the file.

Coding and Files

You can find several books online about how to format and code a file in e-book form. You can find businesses and individuals you offer conversion services as well. Whatever you do, try to make the text and the file as clean as possible.

That means sending a copy to your Kindle or other e-reading device and reading it there. Check for funky formatting problems. Read through it and catch typos you didn't in any other way. Click through the whole thing to make sure it looks and feels right.

The vast majority of e-books sold are still through Amazon on the Kindle, but more and more people are buying other e-readers, so it's wise to get your books onto Smashwords, which supports virtually any file type. If you follow all their instructions, Smashwords will also put your book up for sale through Barnes & Noble (for the Nook), onto the Sony readers, and even the Apple iStore. But note that formatting for Smashwords is far more complicated than for the Kindle.

Your E-book Editor

Whether it's a beta reader or a hired freelance editor, tell the person reading your manuscript that you plan to publish the piece in e-book form.

That way they won't add hard page breaks, delete the spaces next to the em dashes, or otherwise change the format to what used to be the rule.

Defining Markets

2011-08-03T08:00:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Knowing who your readers are is crucial. Your readers define your market and genre. Market and genre define where your book will be shelved (or indexed online) and therefore how potential readers will find you.

It also defines how you write your book.

Below are some basic genres and markets. The descriptions are very much generalized, but they'll at least give you an idea of how the publishing industry breaks things up.

Early Chapter Books

These are books young readers cut their teeth on. They're longer than picture books (but will still have some pictures), have larger fonts, and stick to pretty simple story lines. Books in this market include everything from the Arthur chapter books to the Frog and Toad series, Junie B. Jones, The Magic Tree House books, and so forth.

Middle Grade

Much longer books, few if any illustrations. Focused on emerging readers who can handle more complex stories and characters. Themes aren't too intense, and the protagonists are usually early teens. Middle grade has quite a range, from Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Dear Dumb Diary to more complex books like the Fablehaven series, Percy Jackson, and the Deltora Quest series, along with the early Harry Potter books. (As Harry ages, so does his market. The later books are clearly Young Adult.)

Young Adult

Older teens are the main characters, and with that, we get more difficult and complex stories and themes. That can mean more violence and other content (language, drugs, innuendo, etc.), but it doesn't have to. Often YA means longer books. Examples include The Hunger Games, My Fair Godmother, and The Maze Runner.

Speculative

This is a huge umbrella that covers several genres. In the most basic terms, "Speculative" means science fiction and fantasy. It can also include paranormal, horror, and other "otherworldly" stories. Within speculative you'll find sub-genres like dystopian, post-apocalyptic, high fantasy, low fantasy, and more. If you're writing here, you'll need to do research so you know what's out there and where you fit. Examples: Ender's Game, I Am Not a Serial Killer, and Mistborn.

Romance

The cardinal rule: the couple must end up together in a committed relationship. That doesn't mean we need to see an engagement or a wedding, but they need to be together, essentially "happily ever after."

You can certainly write stories where the couple doesn't get together. Such books sell well, but they're in a different genre (women's fiction or literary fiction). They cannot wear the label of "Romance."

Romance isn't all "bodice-rippers." It's a huge market (the best-selling genre by a mile). Included are category romances and stand-alone titles (find out which you write) and levels of "heat" from "sweet" (where the hero and heroine do no more than kiss) up to the really spicy (which can border on erotica) and everything in between. Examples of Romance writers: Danielle Steele, Georgette Heyer.

Mystery

In the same vein, a mystery must have the crime (usually a murder) solved by the end, or it's simply not a mystery. This genre has a big range of sub-genres, including culinary and cozy mysteries on one end and hard-boiled, intense (and possibly graphic) stuff on the other. As with Romance, if you violate genre conventions, you're going to end up with ticked off readers. Example: anything by Agatha Christie.

Thriller

In some ways, a thriller is the reverse of a mystery. In a mystery, we're trying to piece together clues to figure out who did it. In a thriller, we usually have a clue as to who the bad guy is, and we're trying to escape them or stop them from doing something horrible. Examples: The Hunt for Red October, The Da Vinci Code.

Women's Fiction

Somewhat of a broad term that encompasses literature that's often seen in book clubs. Features women and issues they face, but isn't Romance by genre terms. Examples: The Poisonwood Bible, The Help.

Of course, this is in no way an exhaustive list of genres or markets. In many cases, age-group markets are combined with genres, so you can end up with Young Adult Romance (most titles by Janette Rallison's books), Middle Grade Speculative (Percy Jackson), Young Adult Paranormal Romance (Twilight), and so forth.

Know your market and genre and then read it. Learn the ropes. Learn what's been done, learn what the readers expect. Learn the rules and which ones you can break (and why). Figure out what's old and what you can offer that's fresh.

Then get back to the keyboard and write!

Taking a Critique, Part 2

2011-07-27T10:38:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

REMEMBER TO REGISTER for the PEG Live Writing Workshop! $35 for the full day, Saturday, August 13. Sign up HERE.

A few weeks ago, I posted about how to take a critique.

That post has a lot of important points, so if you haven't read it, do. Then come back.

Now for the next step: actively using a critique. I'll use the term editor below when referring to the person who did your critique. That could be a critique group member, beta reader, editor, or anyone else who is giving you feedback.

1) Before changing anything, do an initial pass.

Read through the entire edit quickly, without making any changes. You'll get a simple overview of what's ahead. Take stock of what's been changed, suggested, noted. Get a feel for what kinds of changes your editor sees for the book (or chapter or scene) as a whole. If you don't know your editor personally, this also helps to give you a feel for their personality.

2) Set it aside and take a deep breath.

If you're anything like me, even if you can take a critique because you've built up thick skin, you'll still get butterflies (or, say, nausea) opening up and reading an edit for the first time. That feeling may not subside (and it may get worse) after that initial pass. Sometimes setting the work aside for a bit (an hour, a day, a week, whatever it takes) lets you come back without the nerves but with a clearer, more objective view. Making changes is so much easier when your stomach isn't an emotional knot.

3) Attack the small stuff first.

That means addressing anything that you can change in short spurts, whether it's punctuation, grammar, and other line-editing stuff, or fixing somewhat bigger stuff, like showing this scene instead of telling it, upping the characterization in that scene, and so on.

4) When you find "big stuff," skip it. For now.

You'll be cruising along on your edit, with pages behind you, when you hit chapter nine and a big huge comment that you know is valid but is going to require some serious changes. The changes could mean rewriting entire sections or going through the entire manuscript to fix the same problem in multiple pages. Whatever it is, "big stuff" can be overwhelming. It can also be discouraging. With any luck, you won't have more than about ten or so "big stuff" issues.

5) THEN attack the hairy parts.

There's nothing quite as satisfying as seeing a lot of work done, whether it's manuscript pages or notes in an electronic file. Relish in the victory of finishing that "easy" pass (because even the easy pass isn't easy; it is work). Now go back and deal with the bigger stuff, one issue at a time, as your creative brain (and, let's face it, your emotional stress detector) can take them. If you get stuck, set the work aside again and think through the big issue you're facing to find the best way to address it. Don't rush big fixes.

6) Go over it again.

When you've addressed every note and change in the edit, do a final pass. You may catch an problems you've inadvertently inserted into the text through your changes (time lines, character or location details, overall consistency). Fix them as you come across them.

And while you're at it, be sure to enjoy reading through a cleaner, better version of your work.

Monday Mania--First Page

2011-07-25T08:11:00.000-06:00

One of our readers has submitted a first page for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #46

“Well, it’s not much, is it?”

The landlord’s forehead wrinkled up like crumpled paper. “I give you the deal of a lifetime, you tell me ‘not much?’”

Soren scratched his shoulder where the strap of his satchel had begun to rub through his thin shirt. His eyes scanned the building before him again. It looked like the innards of a sandwich squashed between two chunks of bread, pressed so close to the neighboring buildings that he doubted he could squeeze between the peeling old walls without turning sideways. A layer of grime coated the front windows and the door sagged pitifully crooked on its hinges. He thought the building might have been all white at one time, but now it displayed bare, muddy-looking brick with streaks of peeling gray and only specks of remaining white. An uneven patch of rough boards had been nailed just below one front window and Soren forced his eyes to the roof before he could think about a possibly gaping hole in the wall. The shingles were either missing or curling up on themselves like dead spiders; he winced at the prospect of placing buckets around the place to catch leaks. The thing did have two floors, but they couldn’t possibly amount to more than four rooms total, and only if two of those were bathrooms the size of broom-closets.

“It is affordable,” he admitted. He pursed his lips. “But it’s still not much.”
The landlord harrumphed. “This my only business vacancy. You don’t like? Go pay a fortune at someplace ‘much.’”

Soren chewed on his lip for a few seconds. He thought this would be an appropriate time to weigh his options, but found there was nothing he could put on the opposite side of the scale—the building before him really was the only thing he’d found that he could pay for. What had happened to the time when people could pay the same price for ten times the quality?

Of course, the answer to that was simple—the invasion had happened.

He sighed and held a hand out. “I’ll take it.”

With another harrumph, the landlord slapped a rusty key into his palm.

New Guide for Adolescent Literature

2011-07-21T08:56:00.000-06:00

Many of us have been following Lu Ann Staheli's book reviews for years. This week, her new Guide to Adolescent literature has been released, called: Books, Books, and More Books: A Parent and Teacher's Guide to Adolescent Literature.

Congrats to our own PEG senior editor, Lu Ann!

If any of our blog followers have a book release, we are happy to announce it here.

The Future of Publishing

2011-07-20T08:00:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

FIRST, A REMINDER:
The registration deadline for the Precision Editing live critique workshop is less than two weeks away. A refresher: Saturday, August 13, 10:30 to 3:30, $35. CLICK HERE for more info.

The internet's filled with people rabidly taking sides on the debate about what the future holds for publishers and writers.

Will independent authors publishing e-books become the norm?

Will agents become obsolete?

Will publishers become obsolete?

Are agents and publishers quaking in their boots because people like J. A. Konrath, Amanda Hocking, and Victorine Lieske have made good (like, really good) money self-publishing e-books?

Some people take the side of the traditional publishing route, saying that while there are some random successes out there in the indie e-book world, that really the only good way to publish is still the mainstream way, and writers should shun the indie e-book path altogether.

Some on the opposite side of the spectrum insist that traditional publishing is somehow an evil plot and the gatekeepers (agents and editors) preventing great writers from breaking out are finally out of our way.

These last people are the ones who sort of wigged when Amanda Hocking signed a traditional publishing contract.

The others cheered when Barry Eisler turned down a contract to go indie.

From what I've seen online, it appears that neither writer is choosing one side or the other. They're pursuing both paths.

Which goes to show that there is no single right answer. It's a complicated issue.

Seth Godin (famous for Purple Cow, Tribes, and other books), insists that he'll no longer publish traditionally because he doesn't need anything the publishing houses offer. He can do it all on his own.

Well, sure he can. Now. His former publishers helped him get to the point he's at, with an eager audience just waiting to buy his next (self-pubbed) e-book. But he wouldn't be in that position without having had a traditional publisher first.

E-books are definitely going to be a big part of the future in publishing. I doubt anyone will argue that. How big a part and in what way is the question. More and more people own e-readers and devices that can read books (iPads, smart phones) than ever. Last Christmas reportedly had the biggest spike in e-book sales ever thanks to all the people who'd opened up Kindles that morning.

What's a writer to do? Should you embrace the indie e-book world? Shun that world and cling to traditional publishing?

How about shunning neither?

Educate yourself on what your goals are for your writing and what it takes to reach that goal. What does success look like to you?

Be realistic. Don't use Amanda Hocking as reason to self-publish e-books (that's just as silly as using JK Rowling as an excuse to go the traditional route).

I've done both: I've traditionally published seven novels and a cookbook. I've self-published a grammar guide (originally in hard copy, but now also in e-book form). After my first two novels went out of print and I got the rights back, I spit-polished them and made them available as e-books. Very soon I'll have a totally different e-book up too, one that's never been published (and one that's not in my usual genre: it's a YA fantasy).

I have every intention of publishing more e-books, because it's been as successful as I intended it to be.

But I also have every intention of pursuing traditional publishing as well, for different reasons.

When forecasting the future of publishing, the only thing we really know right now is that we don't know.

Bob Mayer is a hugely successful writer who straddles both worlds. (And he's got a great blog. Here and here are two posts to read if you're at all interested in this issue, but he's got lots more.)

By pretty much any definition, he's a success in both. First he published something like 40 books the regular route over the course of 20 years before dipping his toes in indie waters. He's been there for two, and now sells over 1500 books a day.

At the end of THIS POST, he says:

No one really knows what is going on. All the industry experts can predict all they want, but the reality is they’ve underestimated digital and the effects ebooks would have on authors and readers—the people who drive this business. It really is an exciting time to be an author. The key is to educate yourself, know and understand your options and make the right decision for yourself.

So write the best book you possibly can. Learn your options. Learn what to expect. Know what you're getting into. Define "success" for yourself and know the likelihood of reaching that through either path.

And then review that path (and your definition of "success") as the industry changes and grows, because what's true about publishing and e-books today very well may not be true in a year or two.

The Journey

2011-07-08T06:25:00.000-06:00

By Josi S. Kilpack

Attend a writer's conference or talk to another writer and, inevitably, you'll get to hear about that writer's journey. How they started. What their initial goals were. The failures and the successes.

For a long time, I would hear another writer talk about their successful signing and I would envy that--mine never felt like they were that great. I'd hear them talk about their two dozen rejections and I would find myself envying that too--I hadn't put myself out there enough to get rejected. I would covet this writer's schedule, this writer's life long goals, and wish I had a great story to tell too. For many years I directed attention away from how I got started or how I moved forward because it just felt ... lame compared to the other stories I'd heard.

Of course I did have a story all my own, but I had pretty much ignored it because everyone else's story sounded so much better. I hadn't dreamed of being a writer since I was young. I didn't get a college degree. I didn't get rejected by half a dozen houses before I was accepted, therefore fully appreciating the thrill of victory. Instead, I hated to read as a child. I finished a year of college and was glad to leave it behind me when I got married and became a mom/aunt to my husband's niece. My first book was written almost on a whim and it was eventually published. What a lousy to story to tell. Where were the inspiring moments? Where were the turning points?

I wish I could better remember the moment that my perspective changed (it would be a wonderful chapter in my story if I could) but I don't remember exactly how it happened. I do remember realizing during a presentation to one of my kid's classes that being a reluctant reader as a child could be inspiring to someone else who also struggled with the same thing. I realized that not having a college degree could be an example of both how I could have better prepared, but also that just because I didn't have that degree, I could still write. I then looked back and realized my mom's love of reading and my 7th grade English teacher's stupid book report worksheets made a significant impact on my writing, even though none of us realized it at the time. And as I started identifying these landmarks in my past, I started to see the journey I didn't know I had had been on unfolding behind me.

I had a 3rd grade teacher who gave us unlimited extra credit if we'd write a one page story about a picture from her box--that made an impact. My dad isn't a die hard reader, but is a passionate artist and influenced my perspective of how to pursue one's talents--impact. A college professor told me I was really good with words--impact again. That I expected nothing great from myself and yet I did something that amazed myself--impact on steroids!

All these details have come into sharper focus as I've kept moving forward and I can now look back on the journey I've taken and marvel at the view. I can take pride in MY story and MY journey, while better appreciating everyone else's. I find that I envy less the successes and sympathize better with the hardships of other writers. I find that I want to be someone who helps other people on their journey, rather than being the defeatist who discourages their goals. I find myself excited as I watch other people's journey's unfold and ache to convince them that the set backs they are facing are a necessary part of their development. Push through it, keep going, the vistas are worth it, I swear.

Wherever you are in your journey, and despite whatever road block seems to be in your way, think of it as a great part of the story you'll eventually tell. A sunset is made all the more breathtaking by the clouds lit up with color. A desert landscape is made beautiful by the patterns the wind draws in its sand. The perspective that hardship creates necessary texture will not save you the frustration and discouragement, but, when kept in your pocket and rubbed for good luck now and again, it can give you the reminder that by being a writer, you've taken on a world that you do not have whole control over. Writing gives you opportunities that are subjective to the moods and grooves of other people. It will not be easy. It is not easy for anyone, but that lack of ease is why it's rewarding when you accomplish what you set out to do. Double knot your shoes and pack that rain parka everyone thinks is a waste of space--the path is not paved that you embark on and the umbrellas are not free--but one day you'll look behind you and marvel at the distance you've come. You'll point to that mountain and say "That one nearly killed me," and that river "I didn't know how I'd ever get across it," and take well earned pride in your accomplishments. In the process, those people still on the far side of that mountain will take your journey as inspiration for their own.

If you need help seeing how far you've come:

Identify two people who have no idea they had an impact on your writing.
Recall a time when you couldn't imagine ever moving forward in your writing, why did you?
Look for a specific goal you set in the past and acknowledge your achievement of it.
Write these things down so you never forget the journey you've taken.

*The image I used on this post is actually linked to a poem called "The Journey" by Mary Oliver. It was very fitting for this post so if you'd like to take a look, follow this link http://www.panhala.net/Archive/The_Journey.html

*Also, don't forget out live critiquing event on August 13th in American Fork. There are only a few spots left. http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=175697319151138

Lessons Learned

2011-07-05T14:25:00.001-06:00

by Julie Wright

When my first book was published, I thought I'd arrived. I would never have to submit with fear of rejection ever again, because I now had a PUBLISHER! Having a publisher surely meant that whatever I wrote from then on out would end up in print.

So when I finished my third book, turned it in, and received a rejection letter back from my publisher that was so scathingly cruel, I ended up in a year-long funk of depression, I was surprised. This wasn't the expected turn of events.

I wondered what that meant about me as a writer. Had I really been fooling myself for those first two books? But then I'd read over the rejected manuscript and be completely baffled. It was the best thing I'd written up until that moment.

And then I met someone. Her name was Valerie Holladay. I was at a luncheon for my online writer's group and someone brought her with them. She had once been the head editor of a larger publishing house, but at the time of the luncheon, had recently quit that job.

I was still in the throes of depression when someone introduced me to her. She asked me what I was working on. Well . . . she asked, so I spilled. I spilled all my frustration, all the belief I had in the rejected manuscript, and all the bafflement of a rejection a newer author could muster.

She did something rare, something spectacular, something that changed me forever and made me who I am right now. She offered to read it and give me some advice. With very little hope that she could really help, I boxed the manuscript up and sent it to her.

Bear in mind, I had no idea about second drafts and self editing. My first publisher was a bit relaxed on their editing methods, and I'd received no guidance in that area. So it was with astonishment and tears of gratitude that I received a letter back from Valerie Holladay. It was my very first editorial letter.

In that letter, she taught me how to make a gritty, caustic, bitter character loveable. That was the problem my publisher had with the book. My character wasn't loveable. No one wanted to root for her--they wanted her to die of a drug overdose (which was actually what they said in the rejection letter . . . classy, right?).

I made every change Valerie asked me to make. I treated that editorial letter like a blueprint for an unrelenting building inspector. And when I was done with the book, it was a million times improved. I had written a good book before, but this was something different. This was a whole new level of writing. I'd never known what a difference a SECOND draft could make. I'd never known what people meant when they used the phrase self-editing.

I finished the rewrite, and turned it in to a much larger publisher. They published it. I wrote an acknowledgment to Valerie, and though I thanked her profusely for saving me the way she had, we never really communicated any further.

I'm writing this post for several reasons. The first is that I found yesterday that Valerie Holladay had passed away on the third of July. And it struck me how much I owe her, how grateful I am for that chance meeting that changed a so-so writer into something more. The second is that I hope you all don't make my mistake. I hope you work to make the draft you turn in the very best you can. I hope you don't get cocky or too comfortable with your publisher, because getting a publisher and keeping a publisher are not the same things at all. The third is that I hope you all take editorial advice seriously. Yes, it's your work, and you should only make changes that you are comfortable with, but seriously consider the advice you've been given. If I hadn't taken Valerie's advice seriously, I would not only have wasted her time, I would have wasted my chance to find successful publication for that manuscript.

Good luck to all of you, and to you, Valerie Holladay--thank you for saving me from myself. I know I speak for more than just myself when I say you have impacted many lives for the better.

Where's the Engine?

2011-06-29T09:18:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

It's an interesting conundrum: great writing in a delightful manuscript, laugh out loud scenes, great showing, awesome characters . . .

but no conflict.

Clean writing on a small scale can get you only so far. I learned this the hard way when a professor read a short story of mine and proclaimed the writing to be excellent but the story to need a lot of work.

To a great extent, the things that needed fixing were big picture issues, like motivation and, yes, conflict.

Conflict is the engine that drives a story. Without conflict, all we have is a series of events. As delightful as those events may be, eventually the reader will get bored and set the book aside if the characters are driving blissfully along without speed bumps and road blocks.

This goes back, on some level, to the two sides of the writer.

First is the storyteller. This is the more common side to have it seems. Someone has a great story but doesn't know how to get it out. As an editor, that's relatively easy to fix and teach.

The second side is the wordsmith, and in some ways, it's the harder side to be on if you lack the other: you can create great writing, but you can't tell a story effectively. In other words, the writing itself is great, but the structure is weak. Wordsmithing is harder to teach (and impossible to edit).

Is your story lacking an engine? Here are a few clues that your story may be struggling with structure and conflict:

Most of the time, stuff happens to your character that they react to, instead of your character being proactive.
The story is pleasant, but there's no urgent problem, at least in a significant stretch of pages.
The stakes aren't high enough. The reader isn't worried for the characters right now.
The conflict, such as it is, could be resolved with a 2-minute conversation.
The original conflict is resolved, but we're still here, and any new conflicts we run into are short-lived and/or easily overcome.

Even if you're a "panster" (a writer who goes in blind, without pre-planning), your story needs structure. That could mean going back to add lots of conflict, structure, and plot points in future revisions.

Open your document to any page. Read that page and the one or two that come after. Then ask: Do we care? Is the heat hot enough for my character? Are the stakes high enough (does my character have enough to lose)? Why should your reader keep turning pages?

If you can't answer those questions, beef up that conflict. Study story structure. Revise.

It's work, but it'll be worth it in the end, because you'll be giving a reader a great experience they'll not soon forget . . . rather than a simple, pleasant tale they can set aside and forget to pick back up.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-06-27T08:01:00.000-06:00

One of our readers has submitted a query letter for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #45

Dear Agent,

Why would a boy, who doesn't believe in magic, risk his life for a girl who exists only inside a mirror?

Ten Wicket, a high school outcast, bonds with a girl named, September Snow, who eventually goes on to become a Hollywood superstar. Mysteriously, once the spotlight falls on her, she will no longer have anything to do with him. While searching for answers, he discovers that the line between what's real and what's not, might have a few surprising jogs in it.

Mysterious reflections, powerful enemies, a mythical muse, a magic necklace and trips to a futuristic world are just a few of the twists that tie knots in Ten's pragmatic, left brain. His cynicism and cloaked vulnerability, courtesy of a rocky relationship with his parents and a cheating ex-girlfriend, ironically make Ten an easy mark for another complicated love entanglement. Along the way, the secret behind his and September's relationship, the girl in the mirror, dangers that await, and the answer to who Ten Wicket really is, begins to unravel.

WICKET, a YA, 150,000-word, fantasy-fiction novel (first in a series) weaves together mystery, adventure, suspense, fantasy, and romance cut in the shape of a triangle. At times, you will hate the characters, at times, you will love them. In every character, you will see yourself. It is, of course, a story about mirrors, but as with Ten, the magic really begins when looking beyond the reflection.

Thank you,

AUTHOR

Why Do I Buy a Book?

2011-06-24T18:29:00.000-06:00

by Lu Ann Staheli

Several weeks ago a question came up about how can we get new readers to actually buy our books. Of course it’s a wonderful thing when the local library has a copy that regularly gets checked out, and it’s even great when our best friends buy a copy and let potential new readers borrow our books, but as any working writer knows, it’s an increase number of actual sales that puts money in our pockets.

We read all sorts of responses regarding better ways to market, how to reach a potential audience, and the necessity to blog/tweet/or friend on Facebook. But I decided to attack the question from the other side, and it gave me all sorts of insight into my own buying patterns as a reader. I hope my thoughts here will spark your thinking into how your own audience’s book-buying works, and maybe we will all see an increase in book sales if we truly understand what makes them purchase a book.

To start my query, I looked back at my buying history for the past six months. I buy a huge amount of print books online at Amazon, along with several books from both Kindle and Nook applications. I occasionally visit the local Seagull Books, rarely go to Deseret Books, and sometimes I will buy a book from Confetti Antiques & Books, or pick up a used book through Amazon online sellers. I used to buy books from eBay, but the cost of postage and the auction process have made my browsing time there no longer worth my time. Today, I’m just looking at the books I bought exclusively in print from Amazon. (I know, this list alone will blow you away at the number of books I actually do buy, and in only a six month period. It’s almost scary!)

So, what books did I recently buy and why?

1.Critique Group: In an effort to always support members of my critique group (my mastermind group of friends!), I have six copies on pre-order of Variant by Robison Wells, and I bought copies of Ammon by H. B. Moore, Captive Heart by Michele Paige Holmes, and The Kiss of a Stranger by Sarah M. Eden. I bought books by J. Scott Savage and Annette Lyon last year at their release time, and I already have The Death Cure on order from our former critique member, James Dashner.

2. Utah Authors: I buy books by other Utah authors and friends, or authors with Utah connections. I either have already received or have my pre-order filed for the following books: Crossed by Ally Condie, The Alloy of Law: A Mistborn Novel by Brandon Sanderson; Illusions by Aprilynne Pike, Possession by Elena Johnson. Monster Hunter International and Hard Magic by Larry Coreia, Beyond Foo: Geth and the Return of the Lithens from Obert Skye, Sean Grisworld’s Head by Lindsey Leavitt, The Forgotten Locket by Lisa Mangum, I Don’t Want to Kill You by Dan Wells, Miles from Ordinary by Carol Lynch Williams, The Beyonders: A World Without Heroes by Brandon Mull, Miles to Go and Michael Vey: Prisoner of Cell 25 by Richard Paul Evans, and The Lost Gate by Orson Scott Card.

3. Student Recommendations: I buy books because my students will constantly ask me if I’ve read THIS yet. So, like it or not, I’ve ordered Inheritance by Christopher Paolini, The Son of Neptune and Throne of Fire by Rick Riordan, and Steampunk by Ann VanderMeer.

4. Writing Projects: I buy books that will help me with a writing project or that was recommended to me by an agent or editor to fine tune my marketing. I Am Scrooge: A Zombie Story for Christmas by Adam Roberts, The Last Christmas of Ebenezer Scrooge: The Sequel to The Christmas Carol by Marvin Kaye, and Ebenezer: The Final Years of Scrooge by Donna Lee Howell will all likely point you toward the topic of the YA novel I’m currently writing, and Love Is Eternal A Novel of Mary Todd and Abraham Lincoln by Irving Stone is for my current non-fiction project. The Case of the Missing Marquess: An Enola Holmes Mystery by Nancy Springer, The Mysterious Benedict Society Collection by Trenton Lee Stewart, Ithaka by Adele Geras, Magic Below Stairs by Caroline Stevermer, Something Rotten by Alan M. Gratz, and I, Coriander by Sally Gardner all were suggested by a Dial editor who had read sample pages from me.

5. Personal Interest: I buy books to fulfill my own crazy interests and passions. Does the Noise in My Head Bother You: A Rock’n’ Roll Memoir by Steven Tyler, Making the Grades: My Misadventures in the Standardized Testing Industry by Todd Farley, The Original Argument: The Case for the Federalist Papers by Glenn Beck and Joshua Charles, Damn! Why Didn’t I Write That by Marc McCutcheon, The Roots of Obama’s Rage by Dinesh D'Souza, Stories I Only Tell My Friends by Rob Lowe, If You Ask Me (And Of Course You Won’t) by Betty White, My Lucky Life by Dick Van Dyke, One Simple Idea: Turn Your Dreams into a Licensing Goldmine While Letting Others Do the Work by Stephen Key, Spirit Driven Success by Secret Millionaire Dani Johnson, The Millionaire Messenger: Make a Difference and a Fortune Sharing Your Advice by Brendon Burchard, Surrender the Pink and The Best Awful by Carrie Fisher.

6. Series: I buy books from series I’ve been reading and enjoyed. Desires of the Dead by Kimberly Derting, Theodore Boone: The Abduction by John Grisham , Something Rotten (Thursday Next Novels) by Jasper Fforde

7. Book Club: I occasionally buy books for my book club. Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen is on my Nook, but I won’t recommend it unless you’re not offended by explicit sex. Let’s just say, the ladies in our group where quite surprised.

8. Gifts: I buy books that either my husband or one of my boys will enjoy. My husband has been reading the Seven Realms series by Cinda Williams Chima so The Gray Wolf Throne is coming in August. Trump University Wealth Building 101 by Donald Trump, Star Wars Character Encyclopedia from DK Publishing, and The Warlock by Michael Scott were also ordered this year.

9. Market Buzz: I buy books that are getting tons of book market buzz, either at conferences, online, from TV programs I watch, or by hitting the charts of everyone’s must-reads. On this list I have A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness. The 7 Tipping Points that Saved the World by Chris and Ted Stewart, White Cat by Holly Black, Robopocalypse by Daniel; H. Wilson, Johnny Appleseed: The Man, The Myth, The American Story by Howard Means, Rot & Ruin by Jonathan Maberry, and Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs. Everybody’s talking about the HBO series, The Game of Thrones from George R.R. Martin. Divergent by Veronica Roth, Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy by Eric Metaxas, 20 Years Younger: Look Younger, Feel Younger, Be Younger! by Bob Greene, Starcrossed by
Josephine Angelini, Failing Mr. Fisher by James Wintermote, 2030: The Real Story of What Happens to America by Albert Brooks, Romancing Miss Bronte by Juliet Gael, Story Engineering by Larry Brooks, and Stoneheart by Charlie Fletcher, 1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus by Charles C. Mann, 1434: The Year a Magnificent Chinese Fleet Sailed to Italy and Ignited the Renaissance and 1421: The Year China Discovered America by Gavin Menzies, Across the Universe by Beth Revis, and The 7: Seven Wonders That Will Change Your Life by Glenn Beck, Keith Ablow are also books I’ve bought because of buzz.

10. Author Marketing: Occasionally I run across an online blog/tweet/video/or FB advert that sounds interesting. I video forwarded by Heather Moore to our critique group led me to The Nobodies Album by Carolyn Parkhurst. I read a forlorn-sounding blog from author Kirsten Hubbard about how her novel Like Mandarin had been lost in the mid-list, and I felt sorry for her, so I bought it. Beatle Meets Destiny by Gabrielle Williams had a title that caught my eye, and John Scalzi’s tweets made me order Old Man’s War and Fuzzy Nation. I ran across author Laura Ruby there also and ordered I Am Not Julia Roberts. Shannon Hale mentioned Mortification: Writers' Stories of Their Public Shame Robin Robertson on a day she blogged about her own mortification tale.

So what does all this mean? I buy books that are recommended by friends, students, and family. I buy books that fulfill my own career and interest needs. I buy books as gifts for friends and family. I buy books that everyone says are MUST READS or by an author who has somehow touched me.

Now the challenge for all of us is to figure out how the books we write can fit into one of those categories. How can we build better relationships with potential readers so they buy copies of our books, recommend our books to others, and help put our books onto the list of books that everybody must read?

Speaking of which, with as many books that are still on this list that I haven’t yet found the time to read, I’d guess I’d better get going. I wonder how many of these I can finish before my next box of books arrives?

How to Take a Critique

2011-06-22T11:37:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

As many of our regular readers know, I've been part of a great critique group for a long time (since January of 2000). I've been published for 9 of those years, and I've been editing professionally for at least five of those. It's safe to say I've been on both sides of the "get your work torn apart" process.

With that in mind, here are a few guidelines for when you get feedback, whether it's from a beta reader, a critique group member, or an editor.

1) No matter what anyone says, it's still your book.

No one's opinion is law. Therefore: you don't have to change anything you don't want to.

Sometimes that realization is rather freeing.

It's also a pain in the neck, because things are so subjective in the arts. At times it would be nice to have a formula: X + Y = success! It's not quite like that.

That said:

2) Consider each piece of feedback seriously.

Even if you totally disagree with someone's suggestion about changing a section, don't dismiss the idea out of hand. Think about whether they have a valid point. Maybe their fix isn't the best idea, but their diagnosis is right on: something is indeed wrong with the section.

So maybe Mark wouldn't say what the editor suggested, but is there a chance his original dialog was flat or unmotivated? Is pace sagging here? Is that chapter confusing? Sometimes editors are great at spotting problems and suggesting solutions, but it's your job as the writer to figure out the best fix.

3) Don't argue, debate, or defend.

You've asked for (maybe even paid for!) an opinion. If you don't agree with it, fine. But insisting that your reader misread or misinterpreted your work, or insisting it must be this way or the reader is an idiot and missed this or that and here is why? That's not useful. (And it can be insulting; you asked for an opinion and got one.)

Okay, maybe the person is an idiot.

Or . . . maybe your reader missed a big point because you didn't write it effectively.

Figure out which it is, and, if necessary, get back to work. If getting an honest critique or edit stings too much and/or makes you want to whip out your defensive karate moves, there's a chance you're not ready for outside feedback quite yet.

4) A corollary: Just because something "really" is a certain way or "really" happened that way, doesn't mean it'll be believable.

For example: Some time ago, as I prepared to write a scene where a character dies, I read several first-person accounts from people who had loved ones die in similar circumstances. In my scene, I added the kinds of details that really happened to real people.

My critique group got hung up on a few of them because they didn't feel real.

What did I do? I could have insisted that "Some people really do go through it just like this." (And I could have proved it.)

Instead, I recognized that if those details pulled them out of the scene, if the moment didn't ring true, I needed to revise. I found other details (also real) that felt more true and familiar. The result was a much more powerful scene.

5) Don't go back to your editor to answer their "questions."

I put that in quotation marks, because if an editor writes notes like "Where are they?" or "What's the name of that museum?" or "I don't think such a building on that street exists, does it?" the editor is not really asking because they want an answer.

They're asking for the reader's benefit.

The editor is merely pointing out an issue for you as the writer to address: something is confusing, telly, unclear, or unbelievable. The question is a way for the editor to tell you that something isn't working. Questions give you, the writer, a direction to go.

I don't know of a single editor who ever waits for a client to send an email with, "Oh, by the way, the building you asked about is two blocks west of the City Bank on Main Street. It really exists. Here's a Google Map link to prove it."

(Thanks . . . that was totally keeping me up at night . . .)

In my experience, most editors are happy to clarify what they meant by a certain question if you aren't sure what the underlying issue is. But trust me; they aren't expecting you to answer those questions in any place except the actual manuscript, which the editor may never see again.

Answering a question (especially if it's one of those "See? I was right," issues) can rub the wrong way. Which leads to:

5) Resist correcting your editor.

We're human, so yes, we make mistakes, no matter how perfect we try to be. Whether it's a typo or fact we're off on . . . let it go. (Even if the mistake is phrased as a question, as in #4.)

Imagine this scenario (this exact situation hasn't happened, but it hearkens to real events): Your historical novel has a World War I battle and lists it as taking place in 1920. Your editor points out that the war had already ended by that point, with a note along the lines of, "WWI was over by then. I think the final battle was in 1919."

You recheck your facts and realize that whoops, the war was indeed over before 1920. But check it! The war ended in 1918, although the Treaty of Versailles wasn't signed until 1919.

Hah! Your editor was WRONG!

Sure, technically. But here's the deal: Your editor was correct in spotting your error. That's all that matters here. You were saved from looking bad. Returning with "Well, you were wrong too," won't elicit a thank you or warm fuzzies.

6) Have Reasonable Expectations. Or: Apply what you've learned. THEN come back.

Often, we editors get e-mails from clients saying that they learned so much from the 50 pages they had edited, whether it's about showing, exposition, dialog, or something else, and thank you!

We love that kind of feedback; helping writers to improve their work is what we're after.

Next step: apply what you've learned to the rest of the manuscript! Then ask for more editing.

Sometimes a writer wants to hand over 300 pages of a draft, pay for an edit, and end up with gold. That doesn't work. A single edit can take a manuscript only so many steps up. The better a piece is before an editor gets their hands on it, the higher level it'll be at the end of the edit. No matter how great the editor, coal cannot be turned into a diamond. Create a diamond, even in the rough, and the editor may be able to find the right cut and shape for it to sparkle!

This is, as we've mentioned on this blog before, why we often do manuscripts in chunks: it gives the writer the chance to learn from the edits of the early pages and apply those lessons so that later edits will be even more effective.

And finally, because it bears repeating:

No matter what anyone says, it's still your book.

Creating Magic Systems

2011-06-16T09:49:00.000-06:00

by Heather Moore

This week I’m attending the Writing & Illustrating for Young Readers conference. A lot of big named authors are there, including Carol Lynch Williams, Allyson Condie, Brandon Mull, Kathleen Duey, Holly Black, and Kristyn Crow, just to name a FEW.

So for someone like me, who has several historical novels published, but is looking to get my first YA science fiction series contracted, it’s a guessing game—which workshop to go to. I know the craft of writing, but every genre has its particulars (Picture Book writing is in its own class).

Since Holly Black wrote the Spiderwick Cronicles, I decided to listen to her presentation. Last week I’d “tweeted” and asked her which book I should read of hers as a new reader. (Some of my kids have read her Spiderwick books, and might have even seen the movie, but not me). She recommended that I read White Cat, first in her new Curse Makers series.

White Cat is an intricately plotted book based on a fascinating magic system. In this world, magic is considered bad and is run by the underground community, mainly mobsters. I don’t know if I’ll ever write a fantasy novel, but I did a ton of world-building for my WIP.

I found myself doing something that I rarely do in workshops these days—madly taking notes.

Holly Black described her world-building process as “6 crazy blue circles”. Each of her “circles” are the springboard for answering the important world-building questions.

According to Holly, coming up with a magic system that works, you must ask yourself these 6 questions:

1. Who has it?

2. What does it do?

3. How do you make it happen?

4. How is user affected?

5. How is world affected?

6. How are magic users grouped & perceived?

Holly then proceeded to answer these questions in reference to White Cat. (If you haven’t read it, this next part might not be as fulfilling. So go read it!)

1. Who has it? 1/1000 have it; it’s genetic

2. What does it do? It’s curse magic, and it can either bring luck, create dreams, change memories, affect emotions, bring physical death, cause transformation

3. How do you make it happen? Magic is transferred by bare hands touching someone’s skin (everyone wears gloves in this world)

4. How is user affected? Blow back (part of the magic blows back into the curse maker)

5. How is world affected? Magic is illegal and underground magic is controlled by the mobsters.

6. How are magic users grouped & perceived? Magic is not good and is perceived as a crime to use it.

Holly added some other great things to ask yourself during the world-building process, then concluded that it’s great to test your magic system on people who game or role play—since they are always trying to break the rules.

Why Try?

2011-06-15T09:18:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Recently I had lunch with a writer friend. She's completed several novels but hasn't yet snagged a contract.

At one point in our conversation, she mentioned a bestselling writer in her genre and said something along the lines of, "I'll never be as good as she is. Why should I keep trying?"

I pointed out that there's room in every market for new voices, and fans of a genre are always looking for additional writers to love. It's not competition so much as spreading the love.

Again: "But I'll never be as good as she is."

My response: "So what?"

That may sound harsh, like I don't understand, but oh, I do. I understand all too well. Many, many times over the years, I've read a book and had almost identical thoughts.

I'll never be that good.

Why bother trying when there are works as brilliant as this?

Who in the world would want to read my drivel?

Then reality kicks in:

I'll never write like anyone else because I'm me.

What I can bring to the world of literature is mine and mine alone.

I can strive to improve, always.

I should never stop trying to get better.

To think I should never, ever write because others are farther along the path than I am . . . well, that's nothing short of paralyzing. It would mean I'd never write, never seek publication.

Never be read.

It also means never improving, because I wouldn't be in the trenches, working, writing, doing, learning. And never finding out what I'm capable of.

So no, I'll never be Author X or Novelist Y. And that's OKAY.

What I do need to be is the best ME that I can. That's a lifetime pursuit, one that won't come by watching my life pass by as I wait for it to happen. It won't come unless I act, sit down, write, submit. Wash, rinse, repeat.

In other words, I have do the work.

When in doubt, read The War of Art by Steven Pressfield.

Read it again with a red pen.

Then write.

And write some more.

And never stop.

Announcing our Live Critque Workshop

2011-05-25T09:11:00.000-06:00

Precision Editing's LIVE CRITIQUING WORKSHOP

August 13, 2011
American Fork Library
64 South 100 East, American Fork, UT
Doors open: 10:00 a.m.
Workshop: 10:30 a.m. -- 3:30 p.m.
Includes one hour lunch break, lunch on your own

Registration deadline: August 1st

**Limited Space**

Payments to: www.paypal.com
Pay $35.00 to PayPal account: editor@precisioneditinggroup.com
**include "PEG Workshop" in the notes
**include your email address in the notes if different from your paypal address
(you don't need a PayPal account to do this)

Instructors include best-selling & award-winning authors:
Annette Lyon (Best of State winner, Whitney Award winner, author of historical fiction, women's fiction, romance, and a cookbook)

Josi S. Kilpack (Whitney Award winner, author of women's fiction, romance, suspense, culinary mysteries)

Lu Ann Staheli (Best of State winner in non-fiction, Best of State educator, author of celebrity memoirs)

Heather B. Moore (Best of State winner, Whitney Award winner, author of historical fiction and non-fiction)

Julie Wright (Whitney Award winner, author of middle grade science fiction, time-travel, contemporary young adult, and romance)

Bring:
15 pages of your manuscript, double-spaced, 12 point type
**Make 6 copies for your critique table

(We may not get through all 15 pages, but we should get through at least 10)

Questions: email editor@precisioneditinggroup.com

This information is also on our PEG WORKSHOPS page

Power of Punctuation in Pacing

2011-05-20T12:25:00.000-06:00

By Josi S. Kilpack

The pace of a novel essentially means the rate at which your story unfolds. For the reader, it's about how quickly the action builds in your story. For the writer, it's manipulating time so that you show and tell in the appropriate places and hold the reader's attention perfectly from one scene to another. A book that moves too slowly will lose reader interst, a book that moves to fast will overwhelm them.

Complex, compound, and complex-compound sentences slow down the pace of your writing and offers you the chance to develop your character, describe a scene, give sensory details, and allow your character (and reader) time to reflect, consider, plan, and prepare. Regardless of genre, some slower paced portions are necessary in every novel. Longer sentences give way to longer paragraphs, softer verb usage, and other things that keep things moving, but not so fast there there isn't time to contemplate.

Short, simple, punchier sentences, on the other hand, speed things up and keep the reader reading so fast that there isn't time to think so much. A fast pace is essential in action scenes and to create an emotional reaction from your reader. Shorter sentences give way to shorter paragraphs and crisp verbs that keep the impact high when you want to keep your reader glued to the page.

What pace is the right pace for your novel is determined by several factors: genre, market, character vs. plot driven, etc. How you manipulate the time, and subconsciously cue the reader as to how fast they should be reading, is often controlled by punctuation. Think of it in regard to driving, and how we are 'cued' by signs, signals, and other elements of the American roadways. Punctuation does the exact same thing for your reader:

Period = stop (full brake)
Comma = pause (slow brake before speeding back up)
Ellipsis . . . = pause during continuation (rubbernecking)
Semicolon = longer pause (rolling through a stop sign)
Exclamation point = stop (yelled stop from the passenger--think about how many of those you can take before you smack someone upside the head :-)
Question mark = pause + prod (sharp turn--not a stop because the need for an answer creates a continuum)
Em-dash = pause + aside (slowing down to read a billboard)

Understanding how a reader interprets these 'signals' allows you to better manipulate the time elements within your story and have it received the way you want it to be. For example:

Example #1:

The coldness of his body convinced her that he was dead and she waited to feel regret. Instead she only felt a long lost sense of freedom.

Vs.

He was dead. Cold. She was free

*Both versions say the same thing, but in a different way and at a different rate. Neither is wrong, just different. they make a different kind of impact.

Example #2:

He watched his mother go about her morning routine and wondered how she would react to what he knew he had to tell her. Would she freak out? Would she calmly think it through? Or would she ignore it and pretend it hadn't happened at all. She made the coffee and her toast, offering both to him, but he couldn't eat. Not yet. Not until he finally came clean and changed her life forever.

Vs.

"Do you want coffee?" Mom asked, looking over her shoulder with her eyebrows raised.

"No thanks," he said.

"Toast?" she continued.
"No," he said again. He didn't dare eat until this was over with.

Would she go through her usual routine tomorrow, he wondered? Or would she stay in bed, still trying to come to grips with everything. Would things ever be the same between them? It was impossible to know. He'd never had the power to hurt her this much.

"Mom?" he said.

"Yeah sweetie?"

"There's something I need to tell you."

*Again there is no right or wrong here, but dialogue naturally lends itself to a faster pace due to the short sentences and simple structures. Both examples still communicate pretty much the same thing, but the style is different and the punch is different. In the second one we feel a little more of an emotional reaction, in the first one we get a little more character development and longer processing time.

As I said, there are many things that influence pacing, punctuation is simply one of those tools. Play with it. Experiment. Create.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-05-16T08:58:00.000-06:00

One of our readers has submitted a query letter for critique. Please offer only constructive comments.

Critique Archive #44

Dear Ms.****,

It was 2003 and I was living in Haiti and working for a volunteer medical organization when there was a coup to remove Jean Bertrand Aristide as the president of Haiti.

While experiencing the sounds and smells of war—the extreme isolation, the hovering military helicopters, the gunfire—I was also experiencing a fear of my best Haitian friend and a journey of extreme mental decline. This is when I began writing The Faces of Haiti, Belief or Truth—a scrapbook of memories about a single voluntary commitment which drastically changed the life of a woman who was confident, responsible, well educated, and respected, to a woman who suffered from extreme fear, serious mental decline and loss of the lifelong ability to make good decisions. Here is the story of a woman who could no longer define who was friend, lover, or foe—a woman, who, when looking in the mirror, no longer physically resembled herself.

The commitment and work required to aid a medical doctor and close friend, with the building of a physical rehabilitation program in Port au Prince, Haiti, began not only the growth of the well respected Non Governmental Organization which prospers today, but was also the catalyst in a personal endeavor that approached the precipice of insanity.

The organization, Healing Hands for Haiti, has provided care and limbs for the disabled, and the education in rehabilitation care for orphanages, hospitals, and many young Haitians. The organization is where I met my best friend; and then began a downhill slide into fear, insecurity, and paranoia. Yet that same organization gave me a chance many people never have to examine my life and the lives of others.

Hopefully I have conveyed that I have had the good fortune to separate my beliefs from truth. Learning that acceptance means an honest, non-judgmental examination of the truths and beliefs of all parties involved—including my own—and separating those beliefs from the customs of a country steeped in mystical traditions. Only then could I begin my uphill battle to regain the woman I once was.

I have been a medical social worker for twenty years, twelve years directly in Physical Rehabilitation Social Work. I began my yearly volunteer work with Healing Hands for Haiti by helping create the organization in 1998, and I moved to Haiti permanently to aid in building a new clinic in early 2004. I later moved into the community of Carrefour, Haiti to heal my mental health and begin to know Haiti and its people in an intimate and honest manner. It was in Carrefour where I experienced a new level of love and friendship.

I have attached the Table of Contents and sample chapters of my book The Faces of Haiti, Belief or Truth and hope you will find in them a desire to read more. Thank you for your consideration.

Dear Good Luck Elsewhere . . .

2011-05-03T15:24:00.000-06:00

By Julie Wright

Dear Good Luck Elsewhere . . .

As I’ve grown through the years as a writer and gone on to complete over a dozen books, I’ve glanced back at some of my rejection letters. Some of them are priceless—hilarity on a sheet of paper, some of them are painful, like walking ten miles on shattered glass on your hands and knees. Some are insightful and helped mold me into a better writer.

I was doing a school visit with author Jessica Day George, and we both shared horror stories of our rejection letter woes with the kids. It's a surreal moment when you sit up and pay attention to another person's story because it sounds so familiar--so much like your own.

Jessica talked about her first rejection letter, how she received the envelope and thought it was awfully skinny and small to be holding her huge advance check and the contract that would name her the most brilliant authoress ever born. And so it was with horror that she realized the itty bitty slip of paper that looked oddly like a sales receipt was really a rejection letter. Several rejection letters later she got a one that was a couple of pages of personal notation by the editor. usually if the editor sends a personal note, it means they saw some sort of spark they want to fan. They usually only take time out of their busy lives to give personal messages to writers with potential, but this particular message wasn't sent with thoughts of helping this young author improve. Jessica describes it as being like a scene from Mulan, "Dishonor on your house! Dishonor on your family! Dishonor on your cow! Dishonor, dishonor, dishonor . . ."

My first rejection letter said something like, "Dear Conrtibutor, We're sorry but your submission does not meet our publishing needs at this time." That was all that was written on the quarter sheet of paper. I wasn't even worth a whole sheet and the use of my name.

The worst letter I ever received during all the years of submitting was the one where the editor told me they hoped my main character would DIE of a drug overdose because she was THAT unlikeable.

That one letter sent me into a miserable pitiable absurd state of existance for about a year.

That book was later published by a different publisher and to this day, I still receive fan mail for it. I guess not everyone wants her to die of an overdose . . .

The letters are part of the business. They are a horrible part of the business, but a part none-the-less. If you keep at it, you'll find success. Elana Johnson who has her amazing debut book "Possession" releasing on June 7th received many such letters, the kinds where they call you dear author, or dear contributor, or they fail to address you by any such dignifying title at all. Her absolute success came because she refused to give up. Jessica Day George is the same way. They are amazing women. They've done amazing things, and it shows that they are strong and capable when they refused to let the letters that send a visceral ache through them get the better of them.

It is a part of what we do but sometimes you can laugh at the silliness of it. (Yes Marion Jensen . . . I just pulled out the silly word).

So . . . what's the worst/funniest/craziest letter YOU'VE ever received?

6 Ways to Get the Most out of a Conference

2011-04-27T13:58:00.001-06:00

by Annette Lyon

In just over a week, I'll be presenting three workshops and moderating a panel at the LDStorymakers Writers Conference in Salt Lake City. As I prepare for my presentations, I can't help but think back to the first conferences I ever attended and how far I've come since then.

I remember sitting in the crowd and making a goal to one day be the one speaking to the attendees. It's still a bit mind-blowing that I am on the other side now, and I've even co-chaired a conference with Precision Editing's Heather Moore.

I've learned something new at every conference I've attended, since my very first one, which I believe was around 1996. While the types of things and the amount I learn vary, conferences are always a valuable experience.

Here are a few ways to make the most out of yours:

1) Look over the schedule in advance.

This is especially important if the conference offers more than one workshop at a time. You'll want to know where you're going and what you want to learn. It's miserable being on the spot, having to decide NOW between two or three great choices.

A couple of other reasons for checking the schedule in advance:

-Some workshops have limited seating, and you may need to RSVP for them in advance. If you miss the window, you're out of luck.

-Seeing the schedule tells you who is teaching what, which gives you a chance to familiarize yourself with the presenters and their work. (And that can help you decide which class to attend.)

2) Leave Your Comfort Zone at Home.

By nature of what we do, writers are solitary and often introverted, qualities that don't serve you well at a conference. One of the most valuable parts of any conference is networking with industry insiders, rubbing shoulders with other writers, and making friends.

Many critique groups form after the writers in them met at a conference, and deals go down thanks to contacts made there.

This is hard. I know it is. But force yourself to sit next to someone you don't know. Introduce yourself. Chat with other writers, both published and unpublished. It's not so hard once you break the ice, because after all, you do have one big thing in common: a love for writing.

3) Be Open to Feedback.

This goes hand-in-hand with leaving your comfort zone at home. If you are part of a critique workshop, a pitch session, or are getting feedback in any form, put on that thick skin, open your arms, and let it all in.

Remember that no one is there to attack you personally. Any feedback you get is given to genuinely help you grow as a writer and to improve your work.

4) Bring Your Supplies.

In whatever form they may be. Absolutely bring a notebook and something to write with. You may get a syllabus for note-taking as well, and a laptop is great too, but you can't guarantee you'll have enough writing space on a syllabus, and a battery can die. (This is a great time to use your AlphaSmart Neo if you have one.) A water bottle is also a good idea.

5) Follow Conference Etiquette.

Read any information on the conference web site and that the conference sends to you. Some basic things to keep in mind:

Don't pitch to an agent or editor at any time except in a pre-paid pitch session. (They tell horror stories of being pitched to in the restroom, in the elevator, at lunch . . . don't do it.)

Don't hog Q&A time, and pay attention so you don't ask questions that have already been answered.

If you made a meal selection when you registered, be sure to claim the meal you picked then (you can't change your mind now, or someone else won't get the meal they paid for).

Turn your cell phone to vibrate. Don't text during workshops.

Arrive on time. Be respectful during classes; don't talk to a friend in the middle of a lecture.

If you have suggestions for a future conference, feel free to leave feedback, often on a feedback form or web site. But be kind; realize that hundreds of man hours and months of work have gone into preparing for the event. Yes, people make mistakes, but there may be a reason for something you aren't aware of.

6) Most of all, HAVE FUN.

As far as craft goes, I learn much less at a conference today than I did back in 1996, simply because I've been working at it for so long, but I still find nuggets at every conference.

But even if I learned nothing new, I'd still go, for one big reason: conferences charge my creative batteries in ways nothing else can. There is no other place I can hang out where everyone there, literally hundreds of people, really get the writer part of me.

No one looks at me funny when I talk about characters having conversations in my head, or the latest cool fact I learned in my research, or how a plot twist just showed up. These are my people, and conferences are, in some ways, my Disneyland.

Scissors

2011-04-18T10:09:00.000-06:00

Today I cut 40 pages out of my work in progress. Even the Dr. Pepper and chocolate bar didn’t make this surgery any less painful, but it had to happen. If the leg is infecting the rest of the body, cut the leg off and save the body.

These forty pages were infecting the manuscript, so I cut them out—to save the manuscript.

It hurt.

A lot.

I did save them over in a cuts document (a little trick I learned from Josi Kilpack) so that if I need to mine something out of those forty pages, I can. But now I have fresh pages to work with. I can recreate the cut out part into something that functions with the rest of the manuscript. If I’d simply tried to edit those pages and force them to fit (which I did try to do for a few weeks until I finally realized I was being stubborn) I would have put the entire manuscript in jeopardy.

I’ve done a lot of editing over the years with Precision Editing Group, and there have been times where I’ve had to advise people to cut out huge hunks of their manuscripts. I don’t know if they always take my advice, but it’s something I don’t hand out lightly. Telling someone to carve away ten or more pages is almost as cruel as having to do it on my own manuscripts. I feel their pain and feel guilt for inflicting it on them. I only advise it when I genuinely believe there’s no way to salvage those pages.

It took a long time for me to understand what other writers meant when they said “kill your darlings.” I’d cut out a few words and figure I’d done the job asked of me. But it’s so much more than that. Killing your darlings isn’t about changing a passive voice to active. It isn’t about slicing off the errant adverb. It’s sometimes cutting the stuff you love.

There was some seriously good writing in those forty pages I amputated this morning. There were things that made me laugh. There was some new sci-fi technology that thrilled me. There was a heart pounding action scene that made me wonder if my characters would ever survive it. There were new creatures that were so awesome, I can’t believe they came out of my head. I cut all of them. They were darling to me, but I cut them all. The scenes were great, but they didn’t push towards the overall arc of the story. They didn’t *work*

That’s what they mean by killing your darlings. It hurts, but if something isn’t working after weeks or longer of trying to force it, the problem might not be the glue you’re using to force it all to stick . . . the problem might be your unwillingness to use the scissors.

Now, I feel a certain relief with those pages moved away from the body of the manuscript. It’s another chance. And another chance is refreshing—filled with hope and possibility.

Interview with middle-grade author Frank Cole

2011-04-15T08:31:00.000-06:00

I’d like to welcome Frank Cole to our blog. If there’s one word I could use to describe Frank it’s: enthusiastic. He has a contagious enthusiasm about him that draws the kids in.

Frank is the author of the middle-grade series, Hashbrown Winters. His newest book is the middle grade book, The Guardians of the Hidden Scepter. Frank has had 4 books come out in two years—I think he’s found a niche.

Something I’ve learned from my writer friends who write in the children’s genre is that children’s authors have to put themselves right into the action—and go to where their readers are: Elementary schools. So if you are reluctant to spend time speaking to a group of school kids (over and over), it will be tough to compete with the other children’s authors out there who are working hard to connect to their audience.

I hope you enjoy the interview!

Heather: Like I mentioned, being a successfully published children's book author requires school visits. Tell us how you manage to work these in and if you think they are worth the effort. Also let us know if you have any tips for new children's book authors out there who are planning on doing school visits.

Frank: I honestly feel it is one of the best ways to promote your work to kids. Especially for the younger middle grade audience. I think kids need to connect with the author and by providing a fun, educational presentation at their school, you create that connection. It can become difficult trying to juggle writing, marketing, and delivering school presentations, but I think it is well worth the investment of time. My tips would be to have as much fun as you possibly can. When the presentation becomes a chore for you, the kids will pick up on that and lose interest. Be animated and be funny if you can. And keep them involved throughout the presentation, whether with Q&A or with activities.

Heather: You’ve had 4 books come out since 2009. Tell us about your publishing experience. Did you get your first book written published? And how long did it take to find a publisher?

Frank: I went through your typical grueling experience to become published. Tons of rejection letters. Tons of rewrites. Always questioning whether or not I truly wanted to continue. The first book I wrote took the brunt of most of my rejections and no it has yet to be published. (Probably never will.) From the moment I realized I wanted to be a published author to the day my first book appeared on bookshelves took about 8 years. Still, I feel it was worth the wait!

Heather: I love hearing the stories of how authors have persevered through rejections and revisions. Well done! I think many of us have those first manuscripts that are buried on an archaic disk drive somewhere. It’s important for new writers to know that their first, most beloved, book may never be published, but we all have to start that next book. What are some things you wished you would have known when you had your first book published?

Frank: How much work I would have to do to promote it. It really doesn't matter if you're published by one of the big publishing companies or an independent publisher. The real work begins when you sign the contract.

Heather: Agreed. Yes, if you are on the A list with a publisher, you’ll get more advertising, but the author still has an incredible amount of self-promotion to do. Speaking of promoting one’s self, social media has become a must in promoting books. In fact, publishers are asking their authors to create an on-line presence. What type of social media do you use in marketing your books? And what do you find to be the most effective or useful?

Frank: I blog (franklewiscole.blogspot.com), I use Facebook quite a bit, and I've recently started building an e-mail list (should've started earlier.) So far, Facebook has been my most effective tool in spreading the word.

Heather: Your newest book, The Guardians of the Hidden Scepter, is separate from your Hashbrown Winters series. Give us the elevator pitch.

Frank: The Guardians of the Hidden Scepter is my take on action adventure with an Indiana Jones type feel, but with kids as the stars. If you like action and suspense, but also enjoy laughing along the way, this book should appeal to you.

Heather: Sounds great. What has been your most rewarding experience since becoming an author?

Frank: I love seeing a book I wrote on a bookstore shelf, but I think the most rewarding experience has been whenever a parent or a teacher at an elementary school approaches me and tells me my books have helped ignite a love of reading within their child or student. That's what it's all about!

Heather: I definitely agree with that. It’s very humbling, yet very motivating as well and makes the grueling hours of editing more worthwhile. What have you learned about the publishing industry that you didn't know before you got your contract?

Frank: I think I've learned there are literally thousands of people trying to get something published and most of them are quality writers with really great ideas. It's intimidating. I've also learned for most people in the industry (myself included) writing an awesome story is only the beginning. Marketing your project, putting it in people's hands, presenting yourself in as many places possible is the very next step.

Heather: Thank you, Frank. In parting, what advice do you have for aspiring authors?

Frank: Don't give up and keep writing. Rejection is part of the business. If you give up after the first or fiftieth rejection, you'll never realize what you could have accomplished. Don't stay married to your first novel. The best thing you can do is to keep writing and learning. You abilities will develop after each book you finish. It's likely your first novel won't be the one that receives the contract. So, start cracking out your second and third.

Frank Cole's Blog
Frank Cole's Hashbrown Winters series on Amazon
The Guardians of the Hidden Scepter on Amazon

Show, Don't Tell: Micro vs Macro

2011-04-13T17:07:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

Next month, I'll be teaching a couple of workshops at the LDStorymakers Writers Conference. (If you plan to attend, be sure to register soon; Friday, April 15 is the last day.)

One of the workshops, which will be repeated, is Show, Don't Tell. I thought I'd give a sneak peek at some of what I'll be covering in the class.

For years, I heard the "Show, Don't Tell" mantra and struggled to know exactly what it meant. I figured out pretty early that showing included using the five senses. I learned a few more techniques here and there (don't say she's sad; show her crying), but I still didn't fully grasp the concept until I heard A. E. Cannon speak at a writing workshop.

She talked about the revisions for her novel Charlotte's Rose and how her editor wanted her to show a particular character's personality better. Cannon insisted that she had shown it; we knew that Charlotte thought he was a mean, angry jerk (my words, but that's the gist), and we see Charlotte ruminating over his jerkiness as she's doing the laundry on the prairie.

Her editor suggested changing all that. Instead of telling us Charlotte's thoughts, have her interact with the man. We'd see her get hurt and angry, and then the reader, too, thinks he's a jerk because we just watched him be one.

That's how that section of the book was rewritten, by adding a showing scene. The man was shown to be a grouchy jerk, and the reader figured it out.

As I sat there listening to Cannon speak, a 1000-watt light bulb turned on in my head.

Prior to this, I'd thought of showing as something that belonged on the sentence or paragraph level. I could show by using a sound, a taste, a smell, a thought, an action. Sure, all of those things are important, and they are showing.

But.

They're only half of the equation. They're what I now call micro showing. And showing goes much deeper than that.

What I learned at the workshop was that showing is something you can (and should) do on a much larger scale, using entire scenes or chapters. What I now call macro showing.

Since then, I've gone on to write and edit many, many more books, and I've applied that principle constantly.

Macro showing involves dropping lots of bread crumbs throughout the story, trusting that the reader will follow those crumbs and figure out what they mean.

Don't simply say that this is how it is. Imply. Hint. Leave clues. Add shadows of meaning for plot, setting, and character. It all adds up to great showing.

Put your characters into situations that reveal their personalities. Don't tell us that Sheena eats when she's stressed. Have a scene where she gets totally stressed out (because of great conflict). Then write another scene where she's drowning her stress in cheese fries and a bacon burger.

Don't tell us that Patrick is an overbearing boss and that Cynthia has no backbone. Throw them into the same room when Cynthia's trying to get a few days off to be with her dying mother but Patrick insists she has to stay to meet a deadline. Let them reveal who they are and what they really want through dialog.

If Emily really likes Steve, don't tell us she gets tongue-tied whenever he's around. Put them in the same room and have Steve talk to her. Run a mental movie camera so we see Emily trying to respond to Steve, but unable to form a coherent sentence. We'll figure out what it means.

Macro showing is now one of the most powerful tools in my writing and editing arsenal. Chances are, if I write "show" on an edit, this is what I mean: pull out the macro-showing hammer and go to work. Your story will come alive.

Announcements

2011-04-01T15:28:00.001-06:00

Our senior editor, Lu Ann Staheli will be teaching a writing workshop April 9, 2011, at Confetti Books in Spanish Fork, Utah. Lu Ann is a Best of State Author and Best of State Educator. Registration info is on her blog: Lu Ann's Library.

Also, if any of our blog followers have a book release, we are happy to announce it here.

Recently, Josi S. Kilpack's culinary mystery, Blackberry Crumble was released. Congrats!

Also, congrats to Julie Wright. Her first middle grade Sci Fi just came out!

Getting It Right

2011-03-30T09:18:00.000-06:00

by Annette Lyon

If we writers had to be an expert on everything we write about, we'd spend so much time on research that we'd never get anything written. The late Linda Shelley Whiting, a true historian, spent ten years researching the life of one man before she wrote a biography about him. If I'd taken the time to be that thorough, I'd still be working on my first historical novel.

I've said before that even though I've published four historical novels, I'm no a historian. Not even close. I love history. I love researching the past. But first and foremost, I'm a storyteller.

Whether you have a heavy amount of research in your story or not, chances are, your story will have elements you aren't 100% familiar with. It's your job to make sure those things ring true. A huge part of ringing true means getting into the head of your characters accurately, whether they're a different gender from you, from a different time period, or in a different occupation.

A tricky part: getting the small things right isn't always possible from reading up on a topic.

For example, if you're writing about a doctor, you'll need to know not only medicine but what it's like being that kind of doctor. No amount of reading medical literature will prepare you to write about what it feels like in the ER during a crisis. Only an ER doctor (or a nurse or an orderly) knows. Pick their brains.

Have a lawyer in your book? Better study up on life at a firm, and that means more than legal mumbo jumbo. It's the politics of who does what work, how hours are billed, what happens when clients don't pay, how often you really end up in court, who gets what bonus, the types of law firms out there and what kind your book needs, and more.

Is one of your characters living on a dairy farm? Find out what that means, in specifics: tools, schedules, sights, sounds, smells. Someone who grew up on a farm might mention that when they walked the barn in the morning, mice scurried into piles of hay. Chances are, that kind of detail would never occur to a city slicker.

It's easy to let our personal world lenses do the work because we don't know what we don't know.

Like the time I wrote a scene with male character talking too much like a woman. Fortunately, a male member of my critique group pointed it out so I could fix it. We then razzed him about having his female lead constantly trying to get big tangles out of her hair with nothing but a comb. (Women know she'd need a pick or a brush.)

Profession and gender are biggies, but think of other life roles as well. I was pulled out a novel once when a mother didn't bat an eye when a perfect stranger (a big, threatening man) took her baby and walked off. She simply followed along. My mommy radar went crazy. No way would a mom roll over and let that happen. Not when her baby is on the line. I found out later that the author isn't a parent. Eureka.

Pregnancy is another experience I've had that some writers get wrong because they haven't lived it. Reading about it isn't enough, so when they try to write about a pregnant character, they miss the nuances of what it's really like. (No, if she's 9 months along, she probably won't be hopping off her bed and racing down the stairs.)

On the other hand, I've never been a competitive swimmer. I've never performed surgery. I've never driven a tractor. I've never been a teenage boy. I've never raced bikes. I've never had cancer (knock on wood . . .).

That's not to say I can't write about those things; I can . . . provided I do my research not only into the surface-level facts, but into what the lens of that kind of person/experience would be.

One great way to do that is by interviewing someone who has experienced that element before you write about it. Ask open-ended questions (ones that cannot be answered with "yes" or "no"). They encourage the other person to talk and give detailed answers. Record everything; you never know what tiny detail will turn out to be golden.

It's also useful to have them read your work after you've drafted it. They'll notice behavioral, setting, and other details you either got wrong of simply left out because you didn't know to include it.

This method was the best thing I could have done with my last novel. Since its publication, I've had readers, who have experienced the very thing I was writing about, contact me to confirm that I'd been through it myself, because there was "no way" I could have portrayed it so well without experiencing it firsthand.

(It's moments like those that you do the happy dance.)

The book is fiction. I didn't retell the stories of the women I interviewed. But I did rely on them to help me see the world through a new lens so I could tell my characters' stories. Looking back, I can say confidently that there's no way I could have written the story with any semblance of success without help. I didn't have the right lens on my own.

Another one of my books features a horse prominently in the story. Going in, I knew little to nothing about horses. I did a bunch of research myself but eventually turned to a friend who grew up with horses. She helped map out a few plot points, spotted errors, and suggested some changes. After she finished looking over it, I made revisions and handed it to yet another expert, who caught a few more things.

When you give your work to a "lens" reader, ask them to keep an eye out for details and behaviors that don't quite work. You can give a partial list of things to watch out for, but make sure they know it's not comprehensive; you don't want them missing something big because they were looking for vocabulary and totally missed that a pilot would never assume such-and-such.

Using outside readers won't guarantee that you'll be 100% correct, but it sure ups your odds of nailing a character's inner workings so they seem truly alive to your readers.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-03-28T10:20:00.000-06:00

One of our readers submitted a query letter for critique. Feel free to make comments, but please keep them constructive.

Critique Archive 0043:

Dear AGENT,

Because of your interest in young adult fiction with a historical bent, I’m sending you the first chapter of my novel Beyond the Fortune-Teller’s Tent.

Petra Baron, a senior at Arroyo Oaks High School, enters a fortune-teller’s tent at a Renaissance faire and exits into Elizabethan England. This detour into the past radically alters her carefully laid future plans. Despite her ambivalence towards her father’s recent remarriage, Petra is desperate to return to her life in Orange County, California. The seventeenth century presents all sorts of challenges -- a gypsy hunt, a demon dog named Black Shuck, and an overwhelming attraction to Emory Ravenswood. She also meets Friar Rohan, who challenges her to ask a new set of questions, “Instead of asking how, you should ask why you are here.”

When Petra returns to the here and now, she’s reunited with her newly created stepfamily emotionally as well as physically because of the lessons of love and loss learned in the Golden Age. She’s lost Emory. Or has she? Centuries apart but drawn together by extraordinary circumstances, can Petra and Emory survive the test of time? A first in a series, Beyond the Fortune-teller’s Tent is an 80,000 word novel.

I’ve been writing for a number of years. My second novel, The Promise, received an honorable mention in an international contest. My third novel, Hailey's Comments, was a semi-finalist in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Contest. My fifth novel, Stealing Mercy, placed second at the LDS Storymaker’s Conference first chapter contest in the historical category.

I studied English Literature at Brigham University and at BYU’s International Center in London. I’ve written for local newspapers and political campaigns. As former chapter president of a charitable organization, I’m frequently asked to speak publicly and I write my own addresses.

Currently, I’m president of Orange County Fictionaires, a local writing group. Neal Shusterman, award winning young adult author, and prolific romance writer Jacqueline Diamond, both friends and fellow Fictionaires, a have promised to speak kindly in my work’s behalf. Raymond Obstfeld, bestselling novelist, called my writing ‘intelligent, witty and strong,’ and Charles Salzberg, director of The New York Writer’s Workshops, was ‘impressed by my writing and characters.’ I hope you’ll feel the same. I look forward to hearing from you and I thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-03-21T10:26:00.000-06:00

One of our readers submitted a query letter for critique. Feel free to make comments, but please keep them constructive.

Critique Archive 0042:

Agent
Address, etc

Dear Agent:

I am seeking representation for the completed novel, Balance of Powers, comprising approximately 105,000 words. Balance of Powers takes us on an epic journey where three separate worlds are about to converge. This novel weaves together what I love most about fantasy adventure, science fiction and psychology, and will likely satisfy your interest in both epic fantasy and science fiction. The advanced science of the alien world Xo’lentia and epic adventures on the magical world of Ru’unta 3 are all tied together as our hero battles the corrosive thoughts of his own mind.

The future of each world hinges on the fate of one man–¬¬–Jared. There is one small problem for our unlikely hero, however. He has no idea who he is or where he came from. Only maddening glimpses of supposed memories plague his mind with self-doubt and loathing. Finding himself in a strange and foreign world full of magical beings and ominous creatures, Jared questions his abilities and purpose. Many have faith that he is the Foretold One, destined to save the planet from destruction.

Others would just as soon see him dead.

But that’s not all. Our unassuming hero has caught the attention of an advanced alien race as well, and some will stop at nothing to exploit Jared to find his home world, Dimension Earth.

Jared may be able to overcome the challenges of this dangerous planet with the help of those determined to protect him, but will he manage to work through his own destructive thoughts and beliefs? Planet Earth, Xo’lentia and Ru’unta 3 may all depend on it.

As a mental health counselor and a life long lover of science fiction and fantasy, I look forward to publishing this novel that ties them all together in an action packed adventure, full of interesting characters and landscapes. The full manuscript is available upon request. Thank you for your consideration, and I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Sincerely,
AUTHOR

The 2 Sides of a Good Writer

2011-03-14T15:46:00.001-06:00

by Annette Lyon

In college, my creative writing professor sat me down for a one-on-one critique with a short story I'd written. He raved about my beautiful prose and sentence structure, how the writing was so clean.

And then he ripped into my unbelievable character motivations and rather lame plot arc.

This was my first taste of the two sides of a great writer:

The Storyteller

This side of the writer comes up with the great story ideas and finds ways to tell the stories in unique and interesting ways.

The Word Smith

This side of the writer has a way with language. The word smith can write smooth and seamless sentences and paragraphs, often beautiful ones.

Many writers have one as their primary writing strength (like I did), and while they can always improve in that area, they have to actively learn the other side. The good news is that, in general, you can strengthen the side you're weaker on.

Back in college, I was pretty solidly a word smith. I've since studied books and magazines, gone to conferences, been critiqued by solid writers, and more to learn how to tell a great story. It's taken years of studying the craft to figure out how to create a great plot and tell a ripping good yarn, but I think it's paid off.

On the flip side, I know writers who have an innate ability to spin those yarns. They have huge imaginations that take flight and hold other people captive . . . but they can't string two sentences together without sounding clunky and awkward.

The good news for natural storytellers is that often a great idea and a wild story can get a writer's toe in the publishing door, while no matter how smooth a manuscript is as far as writing goes, if it's boring or cliche, it's not going to get picked up.

In that sense, storytellers have an advantage over word smiths. But storytellers still need to learn the ropes of word smithing if they hope to truly be successful.

I've probably mentioned this story before, but it bears repeating: a managing editor at a publisher told me how they'd had to turn down manuscripts because, even though they loved the stories, the books as is were too messy to take on and spend the money to clean up editorially.

Storytellers + sloppy writing = rejection.

You can't expect an editor to fix all your problems. No matter how polished you make your book, you'll still need an editor, and an editor can take a book up only one level at a time, not from level two to ten in one fell swoop.

If you're just a storyteller, you may get passed over because someone else, also a great story teller, happens to be a better word smith.

Or, if you're like me, you can write books smooth as silk but be passed up for years by others who are better storytellers, submitting more imaginative and exciting tales.

Of course, the best scenario is for you to be both a great storyteller and a great word smith, too. Once you learn at least the fundamentals of both sides, you're really on the right track for getting published and being successful.

Which is your forte, storyteller or word smith?

How can you strengthen (or how have you strengthened) the other half of your writer self?

Quotes & Italics Revisited

2011-03-09T12:15:00.000-07:00

by Annette Lyon

My original post about when to use italics and quotation marks was nearly four years ago, but it still gets hits and comments. Those comments are often new questions that the post didn't cover. A reader e-mail with another question pushed the topic over the edge.

It's time for another edition to answer additional questions about quotation marks and italics! (Cue the celebration music . . .)

1. Series

First off, since that post, I've learned a rule that somehow never made it onto my radar before:

Series don't get italics or quote marks.

A series is considered to be a name, not a title (so the Harry Potter series is plain Roman text, but The Half-blood Prince gets italics). When I first learned the rule, I thought it meant just books, but it looks like some editors prefer to leave television series as names alone (so Star Trek instead of Star Trek, which is the form I used in the old post).

I don't know that there's a lot of consensus on television series yet, but book series for sure are simply capped.

2. Places Get Roman Text

I mentioned this briefly in the last post, and #1 above hints at it, but it bears repeating: names don't get italics or quotation marks, just capped Roman text.

Names include houses (Tara or Green Gables) as well as stores (Sears) and museums (the Metropolitan Museum of Art).

A special exhibit at a museum, however, may have a title that you'd use italics with, but only in a situation when you're referring to the exhibit, such as in a school report, not on fliers or signs at the exhibit. In those situations, the title would be acting as a title. Just like you wouldn't italicize a novel's title on the cover of the book, you wouldn't italicize the title of an exhibit on a sign.

3. Short Magazines Are still Magazines

Magazine titles get italics, and the articles inside get quotation marks. This is true even if the magazine (or newsletter) isn't a big one. You could have a small periodical, and it would still get italics, regardless of length.

4. In the US, Use Double Quotation Marks

When quoting something or setting off a word, always use double quote marks. Single quote marks are used in the UK, not in the US. The only time you'd use single quote marks is if you had a quote within a quote, such as:

Julie asked, "Did you hear Pete? He just asked, 'Who still needs a ticket?'"

Note the single + double quote marks at the end, which close both Pete's quotation and Julie's. It looks weird with what looks like three marks there, but it's correct.

When in doubt, use double quotes.

5. Prayer Names Are Names, Not Titles

So you'd write: Hail Mary, The Lord's Prayer, etc.

6. Large Quotations Can Get Italics

If you're writing a non-fiction piece and using long (more than a sentence) quotes, you can set the quotation off by indenting it in a block and italicizing the whole thing. That's a visual cue to the reader that they're reading someone else's words.

Since you already have that cue, don't add quotation marks to the block quote. They're redundant.

7. Foreign Words

It's common for foreign words in both fiction and non-fiction to be set apart for clarity, sort of a sign post to the reader that says, "Hey, this is a foreign word, in case you weren't sure."

It's usually done with italics. Some style guides may choose quotation marks instead, but italics are more common because of the potential for ambiguity with the use of ironic quotation marks. (See #9, below.)

If you're using foreign words in a novel, I'd suggest italicizing them throughout. Some writers choose to italicize foreign words just the first time they're used and then use Roman text after that.

Which direction you go will likely depend ultimately on your publisher's style guide. For sure, the one thing you don't want to do is switch back and forth between Roman and italics. Be consistent.

8. Quoting a Definition

If I want to write a word and then define it, putting quotation marks around first the word and then the definition would look odd:

"Myriad," "a great number."

Usually the word being defined gets italics (like with #7. Foreign Words). Then I'd add a colon and write out the definition. To clarify that the definition came from a specific dictionary, I could add quotation marks around the whole thing, or indent the section like this (see #6):

Quotation marks, not indented:

"Myriad: a great number" (Merriam-Webster online)

Indented, without quotation marks:

myriad: a great number (Merriam-Webster online)

9. Don't Pull a Joey

Quotation marks often mean you're being ironic, that you don't really mean what's in them.

The correct use of ironic quotation marks would be to say I'm eating a "beef" patty, when it's really soy protein. The quotation marks make it clear that the patty really isn't beef.

On the other hand, a burger from Carl's Jr. would never have quote marks around it. It's really a beef patty.

A YouTube clip of Joey incorrectly using air quotes (a physical form of ironic quotes) has the embedding disabled, so I can't post it.

So be sure to check it out HERE. I crack up whenever I see it. It's worth 44 seconds of your time.

For more on incorrect quotation marks, check out the "blog" of "unnecessary" quotation marks (misuse in the name absolutely intentional). SO funny!

Wait. Where Are We?

2011-03-02T11:17:00.000-07:00

by Annette Lyon

One part of writing that I love is when I'm really in the groove and the story simply flows from my fingers, through the keyboard, onto the screen. It's like I'm watching and creating a movie simultaneously.

Sometimes those great bursts of creativity produce good work. Other times, well, the section needs revision.

Remember: What's in your head and what's on the page aren't always the same thing.

A common problem I see in beginning writers' work is not grounding the reader at the beginning of a new scene or chapter. The writer knows what the new scene looks like, but they haven't put it on the page. The reader may end up spending a page or two figuring out who all is present, where we are, how much time has passed since the last scene, and who's head we're in.

A good writer can jump right into the story, keep the pace going, and not leave the reader in the dust. It's a balancing act of giving out enough information but not too much.

The key is to remember as you write that your reader isn't in your head. They have no idea where or when this new scene is compared to the last one. The story could have jumped two minutes, two hours, or two years. We could be in the same room, outdoors, or on another continent.

If the writer doesn't orient us quickly, we're liable to close the book, annoyed and confused. This is especially important for speculative works, where one chapter could literally be in another world or time.

An example: John and James have a conversation. With speech tags, they're both identified. So far, so good. They're talking along for a couple of pages, when John signals and turns left into a grocery store.

Wait, what? When did we get into a car? Last time we saw John, he was at work.

Shake the head to clear it. Create new mental picture: John and James are in a car. John is driving. He pulls into a grocery store parking lot. Got it.

They keep talking, go into the store, and as they reach the produce section, Jennifer adds her two bits to the conversation.

Whoa. Where did she come from? Oh, she was in the car with them? The writer didn't show us that. We redraw the entire scene in our heads, adding Jennifer to the car as a passenger.

And so on.

As the writer, you're seeing it all. You know who's present. You know what everyone is saying and doing. Heck, you probably know what they're all wearing and had for lunch. You know precisely what the environment looks like and could describe the sights, sounds, smells.

But if you don't describe those things, we don't know any of it.

A similar problem with a scene opener is when we're put into a character's head, thinking about the current situation and what to do next. But we're not in a scene. There's no location, no action. We're just floating around in someone's head. That's not only confusing, it's boring.

So create a scene from line one. A scene requires, at the very least, a character, a location, and action (and preferably conflict). Then we can get into someone's head and think. (But not for long, flowing paragraphs, unless you're looking at literary fiction.)

The tricky part, of course, is knowing how much to show on the page. You don't want to bog down the narrative showing every turn the car makes, every detail of the dashboard, or the color, style, and designer of each passenger's shirt, and every business they pass on the road.

But we do need to know we're in a car, driving somewhere. A few specifics about the type of car, plus a sight, a sound, or smell, are all great additions that help make a scene pop. Sprinkle those in with care.

Likewise, there's no reason to spend paragraphs on every character present, but the reader must know who's there. And make sure we are somewhere doing something.

Remember: set a scene, which means having both location and action.

You'd be surprised at how easy it is to open a chapter or scene without either. Don't.

By the same token, avoid simply stating who's present, plus where they are and where they're going. That's telling, not showing.

Fixing this kind of problem really comes down to show, don't tell (as so many writing problems seem to).

In our example scene, where John and James are talking (and we have no idea where they are), we have a "talking heads" situation. That means we hear voices that might as well be disembodied, because we don't have solid details that ground the "movie" in our heads. Talking heads = telling.

We can fix the dialogue by adding "beats," such as facial expressions, gestures, thoughts from the POV character, and more. That breaks up the talking heads, and it creates a showing environment. The movie in the writer's head is more fully on the page.

The reader figures out the location not by being told what it is but by watching how the characters react to and interact with their environment. If every character is reacting and interacting, we get no surprises when Jennifer speaks in the produce section.

Perhaps James nervously flips the lock/unlock button back and forth. John moves the visor to block the sun then gets annoyed at the guy in the Lamborghini who cut him off. Jennifer tells James to stop it with the lock button already, because it's driving her crazy. All of those details show us where they are (and we get a peek into their characters to boot).

A challenge: Open your WIP to any scene. Read half a page of the opening. Is it clear where, when, and with whom we are? For that matter, are we in a scene or just floating in a character's head?

Look at every scene opener in your story. Revise them as needed to be sure the reader will come away with a clear movie in their heads: the one you want them to be watching.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-02-28T08:24:00.001-07:00

One of our readers submitted a query letter for critique. Feel free to make comments, but please keep them constructive.

Critique Archive 0041:

Dear AGENT:

The Trinity captures the epic journey of Julian White as she joins the Trinity, triplet teen boys Dresden, Ethan and Garrett, on discovering who they are and where they came from. The legendary royal Trinity are unaware that the hidden, mystical island of Athlendora is their true home. As infants, their parents brought them to the safety of the small town of Luray, Virginia for their protection against Zamir, the man determined to kill them because of the legend; for if it comes true, it will ruin his plans to become ruler of Athlendora.

Mathias, the Trinity’s father, is waiting to tell his boys about their history until they receive their powers at the age of eighteen. Little does he know that his boys have already received their powers—the ability to teleport among other things—much earlier then expected. While Mathias is out looking for his kidnapped wife whom is being held for ransom for the Cathriona—a necklace of magnificent power—the enemy is trying unsuccessfully to kill the Trinity. Mathias is alerted to the attacks when Ethan’s destined sword Leazar makes an appearance. Mathias is comforted that the sword has found its master for he knows the sword will tell Ethan what to do when danger is near.

Soon the Trinity’s bravery and power will be tested when an unexpected enemy breaks into their home and attacks them to retrieve the hidden Cathriona necklace.

The Trinity is the first of a trilogy that unfolds the romance between Dresden and Julian, the significant destiny of the Trinity, and the mysterious island of Athlendora.

Since you represent young adult romance novels, I feel you would be a good fit for my manuscript. The first completed novel of 80,000 words is available for your review.

Thank you for your time and attention. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

WRITER

Advice from a Pro

2011-02-22T00:44:00.000-07:00

By Julie Wright

I went to Life The Universe and Everything as a panelist at BYU this last week and got some great information. I thought I would highlight a few of the key things I took away from this conference.

*Fiction isn't fact, but it is truth. Fiction allows us each to see the truth based on our own experiences and frame of reference.

*All fiction is lies. Our jobs as authors is to make the lie plausible. This seems a direct contradiction to the first comment, but it's not--not really. It connects in pretty well.

*You cannot break the rules of writing until you know them, until you've practiced them, until you've earned the right to break them intelligently. -- Tracy Hickman I could not agree more. Don't get clever with tense if you don't understand tense. If you want to write, then learn the rules. Work on your craft. Breaking rules you don't understand isn't artistic, it's ignorant. Learn them.

*Where there is no story, humans create it. We think and exist in story format. --Tracy Hickman I considered all the times I've gone to tell someone anything, about an event, or a situation. I always speak in a story format. I set it up as a story. And it isn't just because I'm a writer. I've paid attention. Everyone does this. Story is undeniably linked to the human condition.

*It doesn't matter if you're published. Being published is nothing. It is everything to be read. --Tracy Hickman This is absolute truth. My first book was published by a very small press. I was published. It was exciting! But was a I read? no. No, not really. And looking back, I am glad I wasn't read. it was a first book. I was a very green author. I had no idea what the rules were. I had no idea about craft. I had a long way to go. Being published isn't really the goal of a writer. What we want is to be read. We want to enter that dialogue with the reader. We want the intimacy of pulling readers into worlds we created--even if we'll never meet those readers, even if we're separated from those readers by continents, or even centuries. What a writer really longs for its to be read. The best way to achieve that is to learn the craft and write well.

The Fear

2011-02-19T21:00:00.000-07:00

By Josi S. Kilpack

I had the chance to talk with a Humanities class at Utah State University on Thursday about being a writer. After the class, a handful of students came up to ask me some questions. We talked for about half an hour about their own personal journeys with writing, much of what we talked about was fear.

I'm afraid to let anyone read it.
I'm afraid that I'm not writing fast enough.
I'm afraid I'm wasting my time.
I'm afraid of being rejected.
I'm afraid of not knowing my ending when I start.

I did what I could to help alleviate the fears that each of these budding writers had and encourage them to move forward. On the way home I felt almost silly. I talked a good talk and I do hope I inspired them to work on what's holding them back, but I worry that I talked as though I have no more fears. I mean, I'm Published! I've arrived! I reached that goal! What do I have to be afraid of?

I'm afraid my current book is garbage.
I'm scared to death of Goodreads reviews.
I'm afraid all the stories are starting to sound like each other.
I'm afraid that my children will grow up to resent what my writing took from them.
I'm afraid my publisher will have a month of revisions for me.
I'm afraid my sales will go down.
I'm afraid that my lifestyle is adjusting to my current royalties and it won't last.
I'm afraid of the newer, younger, hipper writers doing such great stuff.
I'm terrified of ever having to find an agent.
I'm afraid of my publisher deciding they hate working with me.

I'm afraid that my writing isn't as good as it could be.
I'm afraid that I'm writing too fast.
I'm afraid that my current scene will end up being cut, wasting the hours I've spent on it.
I'm afraid of coming across as arrogant.
I'm afraid of writing blog posts that don't sound as good as everyone elses.
I'm afraid that one day I'll realize I hate writing.
I'm afraid that one day I'll run out of stories completely.
I'm afraid that my house will never be clean again.
I'm afraid that one day I won't be HERE and I'll miss it.
I'm afraid I'll never get THERE and I'll feel like a failure.
I'm scared that I'm at page 239 and don't know the ending.
I'm worried about finishing by my deadline.
I'm scared to ask my beta-readers to read another book.
I'm afraid that I haven't taken advantage of every opportunity out there.
I'm afraid my fears are holding me back.
I'm afraid of taking on anything new.
I'm afraid of not using my abilities in every way I can.

I know that fear is part of life, that overcoming our fears makes us stronger. But it doesn't feel that way when you're in it, when the fear is pressing down on you and you can't imagine opening the door to see what's standing behind it. I am afraid. Of many things. And yet I keep writing. Sometimes I wonder why. Sometimes I know the answer. Sometimes I don't. Sometimes I'm so tired of it, and sometimes I feel like I'd shrivel up and die without it.

So why do I do it? Why do those students do it? Why do you do it? I think each of us are driven by different things, but I believe all those things tie back to something divine--some way in which our writing is meant to not only bless the lives of other people, but bless our lives as well. And I don't think that blessing for ourselves will be a published book on the shelf of a library. At least, not the biggest blessing. I believe that the blessing is in the hunt, the journey, the digging down within ourselves as we seek for that buried treasure. I think we'll find other things along the way--discipline, goal setting, learning, re-learning, friendships, teaching, lifting others, and lifting ourselves. I believe as we drop our chin and push through the storms of our own self-doubt, we will become stronger people, not just stronger writers. But I also believe that the fear will never entirely leave us. There will always be something to be afraid of--always. And sometimes we'll drown in it, even though we tell ourselves we're stronger than that. And sometimes we'll thrash about and swim for shore and make it out of the quagmire enough to see the distance we've covered.

Anytime we commit to pursue something akin to creation, something that will stand in our way. Because creating is divine, there will always be those influences determined to stop us, to leave us cowering in the corner, to have us giving in to the belief that there is just no way we can do it. I'm not going to tell you to embrace the fear, or stab it through the heart. You can't kill it. You can't ignore it entirely. The best you can do is move forward anyway, accepting that while you write your stories you are living your own. And your story will be fraught with difficulty and triumph, whimpering and song, success and failure. Accept it, and keep going, and be sure to take the time every now and again to look over your shoulder at the battle fields you've already passed through, count the enemy you have slain and then look into the eyes of the next one. Bit by bit, day by day, one sentence at a time. The fears you face now CAN stop you if you so choose, but understand that if you keep going and this fear eventually lies dead at your feet, another will rise up. Do not look at your writing as a solitary goal, rather see it for what it is--a journey that does not end until you throw up your hands and decide the game is over. It's all up to you. Every bit of it. Allow yourself to get stronger by writing despite the fears; putting yourself out there despite all the reasons you don't want to.

Now I'm afraid I've gone on too long about this...

Happy Writing.

Which Way—DO-IT-YOURSELF or Traditional

2011-02-18T10:00:00.000-07:00

By Lu Ann Brobst Staheli
(Originally published in The Writer, February 2010)

Publishing has gone through a dramatic upheaval in recent years, with conglomerates gobbling up small houses, while desktop publishing and print-on-demand options have opened the doors for anyone to become a published author. With publishing budgets tightening and promotional dollars almost nonexistent for all but the guaranteed bestsellers of “brand” authors, traditional publishers are passing over many well-written manuscripts.

A number of well-known authors with high- volume sales have come from the nontraditional route, and traditional, bestselling authors have turned to self-publishing for niche or quickturn-around products, rather than wait for a publisher.

But a history of poorly designed and edited self-published books leaves most authors struggling with the age-old dilemma: What do you do when you can’t find a traditional publisher for your work? Should you self-publish or continue your search?

Several self-published bestsellers have proved themselves and their authors worthy of notice. Authors William P. Young (The Shack), James Redfield (The Celestine Prophesy), Rhonda Byrne (The Secret), Christopher Paolini (Eragon) and Richard Paul Evans (The Christmas Box) all made their debut with self-published works, thereby launching their careers.

For every successful self-published book, though, a thousand more sell only a handful of copies, mostly to family and friends, often leaving cases of unsold books. According to Chris Anderson, author of The Long Tail, a nonfiction marketing title, the average book in America sells about 500 copies, so perhaps traditionally published books face a similar fate.

Neither kind of publishing is a guarantee of success. Traditional publishing has fewer risks, but self-publishing could be a place to start if the conditions are right for your book. As someone who has published both types of books, let me offer a few thoughts to help you weigh the pros and cons.

Why traditional publishing?
The obvious answer is because that’s the way the market currently works. Books that traditional publishers put out offer a sense of built-in credibility that self-published books have a hard time earning.

Plus, big name, big-budget houses can offer authors advances and promotional materials and garner book reviews from important publications—perks that are often difficult, if not impossible, for the author of a self-published book to arrange. These houses can also get your books into stores where customers can buy them, whereas self-published books may not be accepted by book buyers for retail stores.

Do you want to publish in order to begin a writing career, or to obtain self-gratification—to be able to say, “I’ve published a book”? Earning royalties is a more secure route than paying for editing, design and printing costs yourself. Having a professionally prepared product represents your talent better than the poorly produced book you might get if you choose the wrong self-publisher.

Why self-publishing?
First of all, a rejection by a traditional publisher does not automatically mean self-publishing is right for you. Perhaps your book isn’t as ready as you thought. Maybe its scope is too large or the competition too fierce, or the readership isn’t there, or the writing lacks polish. A rejection could also mean that a house’s list is full, that it recently published another book on that topic, or that your book doesn’t quit fit what it needs. None of these reasons would necessarily keep
your book from success.

Second, don’t self-publish to impress a traditional publisher. It might be a foot in the door, but few small houses will elect to reprint a book that’s already been self-published, especially if your book sales have saturated a niche market. Larger houses might be impressed by a significant sales volume and offer a contract because of your efforts, if they think they can tap a new market.

These caveats aside, let’s look at whether self-publishing might be right for you. Consider whether your book fits into one of the following categories:

Your project doesn’t fit the format of the traditional publisher’s other releases. “When I first tried to publish The Christmas Box,” Evans says, “publishers didn’t know what to do with it. The manuscript was too long for a short story and too short for a novel—so they rejected it. The book had already proven it had an audience when I printed copies for my friends and family, so I went the self-published route to satisfy local demand. Four hundred thousand copies later, Simon & Schuster bought the rights to publish the hardcover.”

You don’t have time to wait for acceptance. With my book When Hearts Conjoin, speed was of the essence. The book is about conjoined twins Kendra and Maliyah Herrin, of Salt Lake City, who were separated in a 25-hour surgery in 2006. The twins had been invited to make their third appearance on Oprah, and the TLC Network was doing a documentary about them that would air soon. We were working on a tight deadline to have the book published in time—a deadline that did not grant us the luxury of writing, pitching and working within a publisher’s calendar. It was only nine months from the time the twins’ mother and I started writing until the book was in our hands.

You face closed or limited publication opportunities. Sometimes a story needs to be told, even when publishers don’t have a place in their catalog. David Farland, author of Chaosbound, a bestselling novel from a traditional publisher, recalls, “I felt deeply touched by the story of the Willie Handcart Company —a group of Mormon pioneers who crossed the plains with only what they could carry in handcarts—and so I began to study it with an eye toward writing the tale. Unfortunately, In the Company of Angels [a novel] was too long for my regular niche publisher. I knew the other few houses within the target market had recently released books on the same topic, so I decided to self-publish.”

You have a targeted niche market for your book. Annette Lyon, author of the novel Tower of Strength, has a loyal fan base not only for her traditionally published inspirational fiction, but also for the weekly Word Nerd column on her blog. “Readers of my column kept asking for a grammar book,” she says, “but I knew the kind of thing they were looking for wouldn’t be a good fit with a traditional publisher. I decided to self-publish and promote a book [titled There, Their, They’re: A No-Tears Guide to Grammar From the Word Nerd] for my readers and [to sell it] at writing conferences where I taught grammar and editing workshops. So far, I’ve been pleased with my sales, I’ve satisfied my target audience, and I continue to look for ways to expand my readership.”

Here are some other issues to mull:
Do you have a built-in readership? “After rejections by the big publishers,” author Kenny Kemp says, “I self-published my first novel, I Hated Heaven. My next book, Dad Was a Carpenter [a novel], won the grand prize in the 1999 International Self-Published Book Awards. Within days I had secured a top-flight agent and in just a matter of weeks, we made a great deal with HarperCollins to reprint Carpenter. My writing had found a wider audience, but that never would have happened if I hadn’t first taken the step of self-publishing.”

Do you know how to market to your audience? When Evans wanted to publish his first nonfiction book, The Five Lessons a Millionaire Taught Me, he returned to his fictional roots in self-publishing. “I’d been teaching the concepts from ‘The Five Lessons’ at workshops for a while and I knew I had an audience, but I wanted to experiment with how best to sell the book,” Evans says. “So, I self-published in order to test it. Once I knew how to market it, I sold the book to Fireside.”

Do you have access to your audience? Many authors find themselves giving workshops, lectures or performances that put them in front of an audience that wants more. Making books available for purchase after a presentation can play an important part in your marketing plan. A great example is Psychic Madman, which I’m collaborating on with mentalist/magician Jim Karol. Most of its sales will directly follow Karol’s college appearances. The Betrayed, my collaboration with a former police officer who believes he was unfairly fired, will be pitched in his TV appearances. Another of my collaborations, The Book of Alan, an upcoming memoir by Alan Osmond, part of the performing Osmond family, will be marketed to the vast number of Osmond fans around the world. In other words, if you already have a platform—an audience to sell your work to—then selling the book is easier.

What types of books lend themselves well to self-publishing? Self-published nonfiction books tend to be more successful than fiction. Business and self-help books in particular find success because they can be delivered so many ways: as e-books, PDF files and print-on-demand books. Fiction can find an audience when the marketing is done right, but the process of building a readership may take more time.

What do I do when I publish? If you self-publish, nonfiction or fiction, plan on doing the following, or your book is unlikely to ever be successful:

• Hire a professional editor/proofreader and follow her advice.

• Hire a professional illustrator or graphic artist for your cover design and interior illustrations.

• Consider hiring a typesetter to design the interior of your book to look like those currently on the market.

• Read the fine print in your book producer’s contract before signing.

• Know what your remunerations are and what rights you keep.

• Obtain endorsements.

• Have a marketing plan in advance.

• Make personal appearances.

Of course, this list is nearly the same when you are marketing a book with a traditional publisher. The differences are that the latter provides editing, design and typesetting, and may help you get endorsements. In addition, the work of its marketing department (theoretically) leaves you more time to write instead of using your time to self-market.

Self-publishing can be a rewarding proposition when the book is right, but weigh your options carefully before you decide to go with this more difficult road. It can be a springboard to future projects, but so can a successful release from a traditional publisher.

Know what you want, then don’t be afraid to follow your dream. Whether it leads you to a traditional publisher or to self-publishing, a book will move you into the enviable category of published author—a place thousands of people would love to be.

Show, Not Tell, Second-Grade Style

2011-02-16T18:42:00.000-07:00

by Annette Lyon

Recently my daughter wrote a story on the private blog she and her sister have. She included two photos with some toys in it, posed.

Both photos included a large, stuffed animal (a white, striped tiger), Snowflake.

Photo one: On top of the tiger, right on its head, is a small doll (roughly Barbie-sized), and in the voice of the doll, the post proclaims she's pretty good at climbing Snowflake, but a friend, Mia, well, she's still getting used to the climb. Oh, and it looks like Snowflake has a new hairdo.

The second photo: Mia, the American Girl doll, collapsed on top of the tiger, with only her hair visible, spread across the tiger's head like a wig.

Giggling, my daughter showed me the short story and her pictures, declaring with pride, "Look! I didn't say Mia fell over when she tried climbing Snowflake. I said she was still getting used to climbing Snowflake and then joked about Snowflake's new hair. See? I showed it!"

Cool part: She was absolutely right. Of course, it worked in part because she had photos to accompany the story. But the point remains: she never came out and stated what happened. The reader/viewer had to infer it. (And then laugh, because it was pretty clever of her.)

Figuring out when and how to show instead of tell can seem like a heavy burden and a big job. For me, it seems a bit easier to do when I look at it in terms of Mia and Snowflake.

Heck, if a second grader can get it, I should be able to figure it out, even for something as complex as a novel . . . just take it one showing moment at a time.

Spinning Plates

2011-02-11T10:00:00.000-07:00

Lu Ann Brobst Staheli

First of all, let me say it feels great to be back. Okay, some of you may be wondering where I’ve been, and some of you may not even know I was gone because, other than a guest interview in 2009, I’ve been absent from the blog since 2008, when I was a regular columnist.

Where on earth did that time go? Honestly, I was surprised at how long it had been since I’d written a column for PEG. I didn’t mean for my absence to be so long, and I certainly hadn’t forgotten about our growing audience.

As a matter of fact, I’ve been working with many of our readers in another capacity, as an editor. So, a wave “hello” to all of you who I’ve been working with, a “thanks for welcoming me back” to the rest of the PEG editors who’ve been carrying the load while I was gone, and a “nice to meet you” to anyone who doesn’t remember me even hanging around here many years ago.

I’ll try to do better—I honestly will—but like many of you who are working hard at being a writer, I also have other full time jobs which sometimes keep me from doing everything I’d like to do, even when those activities are worthy and beneficial to myself and those I’m working with as an editor.

A few years ago, when I was on a panel filled with teachers and authors at a conference at UVU, I described myself as the Plate Spinner guy on the Ed Sullivan Show. If you’re not old enough to remember, this guy—did we ever know his name?—had several long poles that were flexible enough to keep in constant motion. He would put a plate on top of each pole and move it back and forth to start the plate spinning. His job then for the next few minutes was to keep all the plates spinning at the same time. Sometimes a plate or two would slow down enough to make the audience worry the guy wouldn’t get to them in time to keep the plate from crashing to the floor and breaking.

Such is the life of a freelance writer.

As freelance writers we want to write something for which we can be paid. That means we have to come up with an idea, write enough of a pitch or outline an article, then set it on the query pole and send it spinning on its way. Then we do it again and again and again until we get a response of YES from an editor.

Once that answer comes, we are busy spinning the drafting pole. How many words did we promise in length? We told the editor we could have the final copy ready by when? What could we have been thinking? This pole has to move fast, fast, fast if we don’t want to break the plate that also holds our future career with this publication.

Sometimes we have to do research which sets the next pole into motion as we try to find the facts we need to support the article or book we are writing. Check and double check, locate a reliable source, and attempt to do it all within the confines of our already ridiculous daily schedule.

Then there is the editing pole. This pole can start in motion all by itself at a moment’s notice and have a killer deadline. “I’ve attached the final edits on your 70,000 words manuscript. Take a look at it and get it back to us as soon as possible. We’d like to go to print the day after tomorrow.” What?! All other spinning plates may suddenly find themselves in jeopardy of falling as you give your full attention to maintaining this one. There’s no way you can let your book or article be printed without having one last chance to make sure nothing horrible has happened during typesetting. Your writer’s reputation depends on it.

If you’ve written a book, once it’s published, along come the marketing and promotion poles, which sometimes work in tandem, but often mean extra work as you try to increase your sales. Interviews, book launch parties, bookstore signings, TV appearances, blog tours, conference presentations, social networking—and the list goes on.

In the meantime, you’re back at pole one, working on the next pitch, writing the next piece for publication, and doing all in your power to keep all of those poles and the plates on top spinning in full action.

All because we want to be a paid writer.

Oh, and don’t forget the other poles you might be spinning—another job, a husband and children, church and service obligations, friendships, and even finding time for yourself can all have plates that must keep spinning.

With all this spinning, I’m suddenly finding myself a little dizzy. I think I’ll take a break from writing.

But I promise, I won’t be gone another two years before you hear back from this plate spinner. As a matter of fact, I already have an idea for next week’s blog entry...

Options Open

2011-02-09T17:34:00.000-07:00

by Annette Lyon

Back when I first imagined being a published writer, I assumed my books would be young adult fantasies. That's what I first wrote and submitted.

My first publications were something slightly different: a local newspaper piece celebrating the anniversary of a local event and an article in a scrapbooking newsletter.

I went on to do more freelance article work (to date, I've made over 100 sales), but fiction is and has always been my first love. So I kept writing young adult fantasy.

Until I didn't.

I went to writing conferences and started rubbing shoulders with people in the business. I got new ideas, saw new possibilities, new markets. And I ended up with brand new ideas for a totally different kind of book.

Years (and many manuscripts and rejections) later, I ended up publishing two contemporary romances, four historicals, and a women's novel.

To say that wasn't what I expected would be an understatement. And then another detour: I had the chance to write a chocolate cookbook.

Not something I ever in a million years would have expected to do, yet there was that door opening. I wasn't about to say no.

Since my first publications well over a decade ago, I've done editing work for individuals as well as companies. I've been paid for script writing, proofing, and press kits.

I wrote a grammar guide and self-published it (again, something I would have seen as way off in left field when I first started).

The rights on my first two books reverted to me. The first is now on Kindle, and the second will be within days. I have plans to get more books onto the Kindle without a publisher. And I still plan to publish traditionally as well.

At times, I feel like my head is spinning with all the different directions my career has taken me. I literally need about half a dozen sheets in an Excel workbook to keep it all straight.

And I love it.

I love how many opportunities come my way. I've learned that while the work clothes they arrive in may not match my original expectation, when they knock, I should go for 'em.

Some benefits:

So much in the process of writing a variety of fields has taught me lessons that improve my work in every area. (Even technical script writing can help my fiction. Shocking, but true.)

I have multiple streams of income. This is particularly nice between the two-times-a-year royalty checks.

I'm motivated to improve and work hard, because much of my work comes through referrals. If I do a good job for one client, there's a good chance they'll pass along my name when a friend needs help.

My skills as a public speaker have improved. The more I write and work, the more I've been asked to speak. Writing is a solitary endeavor. Public speaking used to terrify me. Now I know I can get in front of a crowd and have something worthwhile to offer them.

More doors open all the time. I'm amazed at how many new things keep coming up the pike for me. I'm to the point where I have to sit back and decide what is most worth my time, because there really isn't time for it all. (What a great problem to have!)

So no, my writing career doesn't resemble my original idea of it, not hardly. The one exception is that I can go to a bookstore and see my books on the shelf with my name on them. (Which, I will say, is totally awesome.)

Beyond that, I do a lot of work that most of my novel readers will likely never see. I don't mind; I love that I have so many opportunities to make money and publish and WRITE. I enjoy every bit of it.

So when a writing opportunity opens up, don't slam the door shut because it's not part of the image you've created in your head. Look a little closer; by letting it in, you may adding a future opportunity that could lead to bigger and better things.

Loving the Competition

2011-02-08T10:49:00.000-07:00

by julie wright

Several years ago, I attended World Fantasy and made a new friend who was new to the novel-writing world. She'd spent several years in the screenplay writing world. I loved her immediately and spent pretty much the whole weekend laughing with her.

I already had an agent at the time of this conference, but several of my friends didn't. So I made a point of agent trolling for them--introducing them to agents, talking them up to agents, and making sure that they had opportunities available to them. I wasn't the only one doing this. We were friends helping friends. It's what you do.

My new friend made a comment that stuck with me. She said, "I've never seen a business model where people are so willing to help one another--especially when those people they're helping are also their direct competition."

I hadn't ever really thought about it in terms like that before. They were my friends, and they were writers. I already had an agent and they didn't . . . so why wouldn't I want to help them? The other authors who were in my same shoes obviously felt the same way, because they were all there--helping each other.

This last week, the 2010 Whitney Awards finalists were announced. The Whitney Awards are a niche awards system for writers. A lot of my friends were eligible. I was eligible. And a lot of people who I love didn't make it into the finalist round. It was hard not having them there. It was more than just hard--it actually hurt to not have them there.

There have been times when I've felt left behind as an author. Times when my friends have acquired agents and national contracts and New York Times bestseller status. And they did all this without me.

Being left behind in that way feels like going to summer camp. At this camp, your friends all get put in the same cabin over by the lake where they have bonfires and canoe races. And while they're having a great time in their cabin, you're stuck in the bed wetters cabin. And it hurts. You feel lonely and left out and . . .

Jealousy kicks in.

I admit to this. Jealousy has reared its ugly head on several occasions for me. I'm so happy my friends are in good places--so happy when they hit the Times list, so happy when they get a six figure advance, so happy when they sell foreign rights in countries I haven't even heard of. And yet sometimes, it's easy to feel left behind.

When the finalists were announced, I thought a lot about the cabins and jealousies and love. I was a finalist, but several people I love weren't. Not having them with me hurt as much as when I couldn't go with others. I want their careers to be successful. I want them to succeed and believe in themselves.

And I know they're rooting for me in that same way. They want my success. They want me in the cabin with the bonfires and canoe races. And it occurred to me today that it isn't a race to the end where only one person can win. There is room for good books. There is room for a LOT of good books.

It's a matter of being brave enough to improve in your craft, to keep putting yourself out there, and making sure that you're paying it forward. Helping others get where they want to go feels really good. And loving your competition goes a long way to keep from feeling frustrated in your own endeavors.

Monday Mania--First Page

2011-02-07T11:17:00.000-07:00

One of our readers submitted a first page for critique. A first page of a manuscript must hook an agent or editor. Feel free to make comments, but please keep them constructive.

Critique Archive: 0040

A fistful of mayonnaise makes a decent projectile in a pinch. If I'd been thinking more clearly, I would have grabbed a handful of jalapenos instead, but my vision did this red blurry anger thing and when I ran after Brandon Willardson's black Jeep, what I threw was . . . mayo. It's probably harder to clean up and it's better that way, really. I owe him twice that for the garbage he pulled in my store. I only wish I didn't mean that literally.

I trudged back inside, satisfied with the nasty splat the mayo made before it oozed down Brandon's pristine paint job. It was only fair considering the disaster he left behind him in the sandwich shop. I pushed the door open and it swept aside approximately fourteen thousand of the napkins Brandon and his lame friends had strewn all over the floor. Katie and Tara huddled behind the sandwich bar like the sneeze guard was their last line of defense against me. Which it was.

I said nothing, just stared. Katie cracked first, like I knew she would.

“I'm so sorry,” she said, verging on a blubber. “I don't know what happened!”

I lifted one eyebrow slowly, the way my mom does when we're in trouble and you know the longer it takes to reach its full arch, the more trouble you're in. Even mouthy Tara shifted nervously now. I slowly scanned the wreckage inside Handy's Dandy Sandwiches and then eyeballed them again. “How do you not see this coming?”

A high pitched seal bark escaped Katie. It was her nervous laugh, an involuntary reflex that I hoped for the sake of her future social life, she outgrew soon. Her laugh had summoned me from the back office to catch Brandon Willardson's Band of Merry Idiots wreaking their usual havoc in the dining area. Like his older brothers before him, Brandon had no regard for rules, common sense, or (it could be argued) common decency. Just ask his numerous mooning victims.

Time: Friend or Foe?

2011-02-02T21:07:00.000-07:00

by Annette Lyon

Recently on a forum, I saw a question from a struggling writer that amounted to, "How do I know if my writing is any good?"

The man had reread what he thought was good yesterday, and suddenly it didn't sound so good.

Was it good?

Was it garbage?

Several people gave great advice. Here's mine.

When you first draft something, it's "hot off the press" as they say. You're too close to the piece to view it objectively. It really might be atrocious. Or a diamond. But you can't tell. At least, not yet.

This is when time is your best friend. Keep writing, and when you've finished the draft, put it away. For some people, a week or so is enough. For others, it could be a month or months.

However it long it takes for you, let it cool off. Let yourself forget parts, including that paragraph you slaved over and the one you thought was sheer brilliance.

When it's cooled off and you open the file again, you'll be reading it with completely new eyes, almost as if someone else had written the piece. This is one part of writing I love: inevitably, I do find parts I forgot I'd written (but there they are!) and I might even love them.

And sure, I'll find glaring problems as well: clunky prose, lame character motivations, sagging conflict, and more. But because I'm no longer so emotionally tied to the work, two great things happen:

1) I can see clearly where it needs improvement.

2) I can make big revisions without wanting to sit in a corner and cry while eating a dozen chocolate-chip cookies.

What do you do while a piece is resting, cooling off? You write something else.

After you've come back to the old piece and made whatever revisions you can, you're still not done. Send it out to other people, trusted beta readers who will see more ways to change (and improve!) your work.

Time is certainly a frustrating element of being a writer. During the submission process we wait for rejections and requests. If we're lucky, we wait on a contract and editorial notes. We wait on press dates and more.

Don't let all of that make you rush things. Take your time early on. Create a fantastic piece.

If you rush things, you'll submit sub-par work. And the end result: you won't have the opportunity of pulling your hair out while waiting for your release date.

Time can most definitely be your friend.

Monday Mania--Query Letter

2011-01-31T07:30:00.000-07:00

One of our readers submitted a query letter for critique. Feel free to make comments, but please keep them constructive.

Critique Archive 0039:

Agent name
Literary Agency
Address

Dear Agent,

Georgina Blackinsworth is not a typical eighteen-year-old girl. While other girls attend dance and piano lessons, she gets combat, weaponry, and assassination training. Not only that, but her dad puts her through “If this happens . . .” drills to make sure she is prepared for all possible scenarios. Now, as her classmates focus on high school graduation, Georgie finds herself locked in a family battle.

Kent Blackinsworth, Georgie’s dad, leaves town and fails to return. Georgie thinks it’s just another drill and blows off all signs indicating otherwise until she finds a letter which explains why she’ll never be typical and leaves her doubting if her dad is alive. Now she must discover the location of a family vault while avoiding her murderous aunt Edith.

With the help of her best friend Jake, Georgie begins a journey full of clues and discoveries. She finds she is falling in love with Jake and trusting him despite all evidence telling her she is making a mistake. As trust fights against her an ultimatum is set: find the vault she knows nothing about or Dad dies.

Encoded Secrets is my first young adult mystery, adventure novel complete at 77,000 words. I hold a Master Degree in Music and have taught in the public school systems. I am an active member of the American Night Writers Association and attend as many writing conferences as possible. If you are interested in Encoded Secrets I would be happy to forward you the complete manuscript. I have included the first fifty pages in the body of the email.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

*Author*
My contact information

Revision Time: Over-Used Words

2011-01-26T10:22:00.000-07:00

We all do it. It's nothing to be ashamed of . . . unless you don't fix it in the revision stage.

What is it? The dreaded repeated word curse. It's dead wood that sucks the life out of your sentences. Pulling out the dead wood of repetition isn't hard, but it does take time.

Doing a search of your document for these is worth the effort. Some of the most common culprits include:

The empty verb/action:

Was

90% of the time, find a stronger verb. And don't resort to passive and other awkward constructions to avoid it.

Another: would

I see this one a lot: Every day, she would make her children their lunches.

Try: Every day she made her children their lunches.

Much cleaner. Also avoid gerunds (was -ing).

Finding fresh ways of showing emotion and small actions and gestures can be hard, so those and other verbs tend to multiply like rabbits if you aren't careful, such as:

look

glanced

thought

realized

began

smile

started

Empty words:

You may find a time where one of these is needed and adds to the work. But those times are rare.

Often, these words are meaningless modifiers. If I say something is "really big," what does that mean? Big compared to what? A boot? A watermelon? A truck?

As a general rule, avoid meaningless modifiers, including:

Just

Only

Actually

Suddenly

Very

Really

Little

A bit

Directionals

Sometimes we go overboard explaining the how and where. When in doubt, cut it. Especially when you have two directionals next to each other (such as "she looked over at her mother").

from

over

toward

under

around

Other words

The most common extra word I see is that. Sometimes it's needed, such as to clarify which of something. But often, it's just a filler word, such as:

Paula saw that the class was staring at her.

Talk about a weak sentence altogether:

1) Since we're in Paula's head, don't tell us she saw anything; we'll figure out she's the one with the eyeballs.

2) We've got a weak gerund verb with was staring.

3) And then that is shoved in with no purpose.

A stronger sentence: The class stared at Paula.

(Then show her reaction.)

Every writer has their own pet words or phrases, and sometimes they vary from project to project. I've been known to catch myself repeating one word, and then in an attempt to avoid it, I inadvertently find a new favorite word and repeat it realizing what I'm doing.

Several years ago, an editor pointed out the overuse of heart in one of my manuscripts. Puzzled, I almost challenged her. How could I overuse such a specific word and not realize it? I searched the document, and lo and behold, oodles of emotions mentioned the heart in some way.

If my heroine saw the hero, her heart rate sped up. If someone was in pain, their heart thumped against their ribcage. Fear? Heart raced. Heart, heart, heart. I think I took out a good 10 instances in that book.

The Takeaway

Search your work for the most common repetitions. Several writers I know have lists they keep of words to search their manuscripts for. That's a great idea. Cut most of them.

Then have someone else read it for you. I wouldn't have known about heart without someone else catching the repetition. Your readers may find a repeated word you never imagined.

As always, don't even worry about this stuff until the revision stage. Don't paralyze your creative drafting mind by stressing out over repetition. This is for when you put on the editor hat and clean things up.

Just be sure the hat does come out at some point.

For other sneaky self-editing issues see Stephanie Black's great post.

Congrats to . . .

2011-01-20T12:40:00.001-07:00

If you are a blog follower and have a new release, please let us know. We are happy to announce it here!

Congratulations to Dean Murray, on his new book, Frozen Prospects: