Two of our readers submitted query letters for critique. Feel free to make comments, but please keep them constructive.
Critique Archive 0033:
I’m seeking representation for my completed, 65,000 word, middle-grade fantasy entitled, Little Pig, Little Pig.
When Eli, a 1950’s farm boy, receives a pair of magical, mind-reading piglets from an anonymous sender, he thinks it’s the beginning of something wonderful. What the boy doesn’t realize is that the pigs have been delivered because of his habit of telling tall tales. The more Eli lies, the faster the pigs grow and the hungrier they become. When his pigs take to secretly raiding neighboring feed supplies and even harming other animals and people, Eli’s impoverished farming community is in danger of financial ruin and even serious injury. Eli must stop the pigs before they hurt anyone else but the pigs have multiplied and the boy discovers they intend to force him to mail their offspring to other deceitful children. Can Eli defeat the products of his own dishonesty before they destroy other families and towns? Or is it too late to tell the truth and make up for what he has done?
I would appreciate the opportunity to send you a few chapters, or the entire manuscript of Little Pig, Little Pig at your request. Feel free to contact me via phone, email, or the enclosed SASE. Thank you for your time and consideration.
Critique Archive 0034:
Michael Anderson has never set foot on Earth, but it haunts him as much as the fear that he will never live up to the legacy of his astrophysicist parents. So when his parents construct mankind’s first artificial, traversable wormhole, he sets out on the mission to explore the source of a mysterious signal coming from the other side—a signal originating from an eerily Earth-like world.
Twenty light years from home, an ancient alien ghost ship materializes in mid-space and starts to chase them down. To make matters worse, Terra, Michael’s mission partner, begins acting strangely, avoiding him and refusing to share her work. As the ghost ship draws nearer, Michael must answer: what do the aliens want? Why won’t they respond to his transmissions? What caused the alien civilization on the surface of the world to disappear? And is Terra the one going insane—or is it him?
Genesis Earth is a 73,000 word science fiction novel. While it stands on its own as a complete story, it has potential for at least two sequels. I have one short story published in the January 2010 issue of The Leading Edge (Brigham Young University’s science fiction & fantasy magazine), and in past years I have won first and second place in the annual Mayhew short story contest at BYU.
Thank you very much for your consideration. As noted in your submission guidelines, I have enclosed ______.