One of our readers submitted her query letter. Feel free to make comments, but please keep them constructive.
Critique Archive 0010:
The Carrot Skin Factor
(YA novel—approx. 53,000 words)
Tomorrow night, Yankee Stadium will be attacked by a group of rebels known as the Gaddi-Anons. Can four teens and a whacky inventor discover the meaning of ‘Crying the Neck’ in time to save thousands from disaster?
Fifteen-year old Zack’s life sucks. His divorced parents have no time for him. Following a creepy midnight encounter, Zack and his three friends find a mysterious gadget called DINGO (Delivers Information, Navigates, Goes Overseas) belonging to a British inventor and secret agent, Hunter MacMurray. It's weird the things DINGO can do and foresee using holograms, known as Dingograms. One snag—the operator must be crazy about carrots.
A mysterious clue (Crying the Neck) takes the four from Connecticut , USA , to Cornwall , England , transporting by DINGO. Will Zack's fears let everyone down? Is Libby’s faith the waste of time Zack thinks it is? Suspense builds to a surprise ending—not only do they win the fight, but it turns out Hunter is Zack’s mom’s lost brother.
I decided to contact you after researching many literary agents as you have found homes for exciting YA books in the past. Enclosed is a synopsis. I have completed the entire manuscript—a fast paced suspense with mystery and science fiction for readers age twelve to seventeen.
As for my qualifications, I have three published books, one of which is short stories for Young Adults; and over seventeen years of published magazine articles and fiction for both youth and adult readers.
Thank you for your time. If I am a writer you can represent, please may I send the full manuscript? I enclose an SASE for your response.